I’m trying really hard to be strong, but it’s really difficult and I’m having a really hard time. number one priority, i HAVE to graduate. i spent hours in the studio tonight and will spend hours in the studio tomorrow. but then there are all my other classes. i can’t look at his messages, it will make me fail, and that’s exactly what he wants. i have no time for a social life. i miss him so badly, but not his insanity. how cruel can he be?! he keeps seeing how badly he can hurt me. I’m so heartbroken and I’m trying so hard to be strong but it seems impossible. i can’t deal with this. i tried as hard as i possibly could. i gave him everything i had. i love him so much I’m so miserable hurt and heartbroken. i sound like a broken record but idk what to do or say. I’m just in so much pain. the worst parts, he thinks he’s right, i love him, i miss him, i care about him, ………. ugh it goes on and on. i really hate everything.
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First priority: Graduate.
This is for you. It is time to live for yourself and accomplish these goals so you can begin moving forward in your life.
It is ok to love him and still miss him.
But it was for the best since you could not continue such a relationship under turmoil. Remember who he was and is. He wants you to fail and you know it.
Dont give in and give him that satisfaction.
But also give your self time to move on. To become happy and independent again. Let and embrace the sadness but know this is something that needed to be done so you can live better. It is hard, you will be in a roller coaster of emotions. One day you might feel ok and feel you can go on in life and some days it will crash. But each time it crashes pick up the pieces and move on.
Remember the good. Appreciate the time spent and growth you have attained from the relationship, but also remember the bad. Forgive but do not forget, and allow the bad to be motivation to be better and have a better life for yourself.
Good luck.