I give up

My problems are probably minimal compared to what others have gone through but it still feels like a lot to me. I feel like my family hates me, they always yell at me, including my sister who is literally trying to control my life at the moment. My parents think i’m immature and probably doing drugs because i like going out with my friends and so they yell at me for nothing. Really they look for reasons to yell at me and everytime I’m yelled at i end up cutting, I don’t want to cut but it’s temporary relief and for a second I forget everything in my life, i sometimes feel like its worth the pain.

I’m still at school and because i’m near the end of school there is a lot of stuff going on and i can’t keep up, I just don’t understand anything and they tell me to ask if I can’t understand but then yell at me even more because its apparently easy work and to go ask a classmate who has actually been paying attention. I feel like i’m causing problems for others and that i should just end it all because i don’t know what to do, the yelling is all i hear at night and it makes me cry so much that it feels hard to breathe. I don’t know how to deal with people anymore, I feel if i got to know anyone or tried to all that they would do is yell. I just can’t deal with anything anymore.