The thing is, im the kind of person people wanted to hang out with because they think im funny, cool and popular and because i always get straight A’s. It has always been like that. Like i dont even ask for anyone but they all try to sit with me at lunch or inside the class. They laugh at my jokes, they invite me to places and i thought wow, i didnt ask for this kind of attention but it’s all happening. That was my story. For 10 years i had that. And then i found out they were all just using me to be popular, to have someone they can talk about, and to have someone they can get answers on quizzes and assignments. I know it’s superficial but it sucks and i hate it. I have no real friends. I feel so alone and everybody’s out there having fun and living their lives while im just here. Im tired of it. My family doesnt even care. No one cares. Sometimes i just want to end it. I dont really know.
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“everybody’s out there having fun and living their lives”
Just based on all those who post on this site, that is not true, the fun part anyway. Why is it we assume the lives of others are so great? And what if that assumption if the source of our pain, how real is our pain?
Nothing is worse then measuring our lives on what we only imagine others live. In fact I would say nothing worse then measuring especially when our units of measure are subjective and almost always badly defined.
The thing about Life is that life ‘is lived’ regardless of our experience of it. We can actively participate with it or let it happen, Life does not care. A life lived badly or well is still lived.