I think that I’m the type of a good girl, I have never talk back to my parents, not even when they crushed my dream of becoming a ice skater, not even when my mother forgave me from seeing the love of my life, but actually she is over- protective just with me, I have 2 bigger sisters, but the only one that my parents don’t allow to go out at night or even with my friends on a Saturday is me, I really can’t live anymore in this controlled life, they are making me do all the things that they can’t do in their lives, also they forced me to start studying medicine, but I don’t like it at all, my dream was biology but they again told me that biology wasn’t a good choice so my mom forced me to start medicine.
I hate my life, I’ve always hated my life since my mother chased me out of my dreams, I was hoping that maybe with the time I would be able to live in this overly- controlled life but it’s impossible anymore for me, I’ll try killing myself, but I’m afraid that I won’t die.
I really don’t know what to do anymore, I’m so messed up, I cry every night just hoping to never wake up again or that all of this is just a bad dream. If my suicide attemp is successful I won’t write again, if not gonna write again.
8 comments
Are you over 18? Then you’re being a pushover. You have to start making your opinions known to your parents. Do what YOU want, not what they want you to do. Stand up for yourself and then they’ll start to treat you with the respect you deserve.
Hey sorry you feel this way. I know really I have no right to judge you on how you feel cuz if you see what I tried to do tonight wasn’t good. But if you also read my new post you will see what happened
Hey there Liz, I first and foremost will strongly advise that you do not attempt suicide by overdosing on sleeping pills. This method almost always fails and has a great risk of causing permanent damage to your body, which will only worsen your situation.
“I really can’t live anymore in this controlled life, they are making me do all the things they can’t do in their lives”.
I can understand the nature of a parent to be protective of their child and only wanting the best for them, but to go as far as limiting their personal freedoms and controlling the aspects of their future is going overboard and extremely unfair. They are creating an environment and a life that is breaking you down and forcing you into path of self destruction. I can only imagine that you feel your suffocating in a life that you feel is not even your own anymore. A life devoid of any happiness and restricted from dreaming.
You deserve to be happy and have the opportunity to make your own decisions. You should not, nor have to deal with living out the dreams of your parents because they failed to attained theirs. As of now, I can only advise that you have a heart to heart conversation with your parents about how you feel towards their actions against you and how it has impacted you life tremendously to the point of depression and suicidal ideation.
Be cautious as to how much information you give about yourself, as it can negative reprocussuon especially if you are minor. But do not feel the need to hold back your anger, sadness and overall desire to live your life the way you want to from them.
And note, once your 18, there is not a damn thing they can do to you nor can say in order to dictate anything about your life. So reclaim your life, seek your happiness and be open to your parents about how you truly feel, even if you must seek a compromise until your of legal age.
I truly hope everything works out for you and never lose sight of YOUR dreams.
Take care Liz.
Hey another thing is talk to them. Yes I know it’s hard and I just did it last night/ this morning myself and told them how I have felt for years. So just try. My parents are very understanding right now
And yours might too
Thanks to everyone but my parents aren’t that understanding, I’m not underage, but they still treat me that way, I’ve tried talking with them but they are self-centered in their ideas that didn’t even bother to look at me, they just thought of it as a joke and even laugh when I told them how I feel, that was before I thought of suicide.
Who’s life are you living? Your own or your parents? What happened to your dreams? What happened to your ambitions? Do you not have the right to be who you want to be? Sometimes you have to cut a finger to save a hand. Otherwise you will die. And when you die it will be too late to do what you want.
Your life. It’s your hands. The sky’s the limit. And no one has the right to take that away from you… many years later when you’re successful they’ll come back rushing to you.
I’m overage too and am in pretty much the same position as you. I understand how you feel, there’s basically no way out of the situation without making everything worse. I live everyday wanting it to be the end. I know what you’re dealing with and know that talking to your parents isn’t going to change anything and getting older doesn’t seem to change anything either. The way I think about it is that some people like ourselves are unlucky and it sucks but that is the life that we have been born into and so have to learn to accept it or finish it. It’s terrible but when you’re in a situation like that there’s no ideal solution, the only thing you can do to make things slightly better is to speak to a counselor at your uni – that way you can learn to deal with what you’re going through. It’s what I have done, even though I know it’s not going to resolve the situation.