I think suicide is just about the only thing I think about anymore. I doubt if I will commit any time soon as I want to record some of my thoughts to leave behind so my family knows whats been going on right in front of them. The reality for me now is that someday I will die by my own hand and nothing can change that. I don’t even have a story, all I am is a middle-class white teen with too much time on his hands. *sigh* Heading off to work, so I can think about suicide while people around me think about other shit.
Ciao,
Brayden
8 comments
What is making you feel this way Brayden?
Its a lot of things, but mostly how I feel about the world.
I know how you feel. Half the time at work these days I’m on SP while my colleagues around me think I’m working. I know the feeling of you feeling horrible inside while people around you seem so happy and normal.
I read your other post and you said you overthink everything. Were you always an overthinker or something happened and you started overthinking and start thinking about suicide? I feel if you were always an overthinker its still better and you can learn to live with it and make things better before they get worse. I have always been an overthinker, but insomnia has made it worse
I know how you feel. Half the time at work these days I’m on SP while my colleagues around me think I’m working. I know the feeling of you feeling horrible inside while people around you seem so happy and normal.
I read your other post and you said you overthink everything. Were you always an overthinker or something happened and you started overthinking and start thinking about suicide? I feel if you were always an overthinker its still better and you can learn to live with it and make things better before they get worse. I have always been an overthinker, but insomnia has made it worse
Don’t let yourself down. I get you can’t stop thinking about it, but maybe it’s just a hard time Brayden… And everybody has a story. Otherwise we wouldn’t be here.
If its just a hard time, then its been a while since its been easy. But I don’t think that’s it.
For some life is easier. Still… Everybody who wants to end with life has had a though life. In one way or another.
Indeed my life messed up from the start yet suicide failed so many times.I know if i could get a gun it be so simple , even plan trips to america shooting range game over not happened yet tho and now i find myself laughing and giggling at simple things.Maybe i should hold onto the simple things instead of hoping for more.