my littel joke has always been i tick the remember me box when i sine in cos that way at least some one will its a sham that its becomeing more and more true iv just come back from a larp event a place were NO ONE GIVES A SHIT WHO YOU ARE OR WHATS WRONG WITH YOU AS LONG AS YOUR UP FOR FIGHTING RP AND DRINKING AS LONG AS YOUR A NERD OR A GEEK AND AS LONG AS YOUR NOT A DICK UP FOR A LAUGH AT EVREY AVALABUL TIME YOU ARE COOL non of them give a shit about my spelling or my scars or the fact i fuck things up or that im sad thay done care that i could go “fuck it” at any time and top my self if i REALY whanted to that dont care because thay know you will be haveing to much fun to be sad that you will have some one to talk to any time ic or ooc thay know (and this is the mane bit) that you will be to lost in the world your bilding around you to be afected by you past or present the only thing i regret is not being abel to talk to my gf so yer i worryed about her all of the time it was always there at the back of my head so when i get home im confused i meen i freeked out thingking she was gone the night befor then i got home and thought that she was dead like really dead now im just sick cos i dont know were the fuck shes gone theres two voces in my head telling me difrent things one shes dead two shes alive and there yelling at echother no what happund when you mix blue and yellow you get green and is you mix that together with all the things in my head you get a “dark rainebow” iv called it this for it starts with two things (happy or sad) it mixes with the rest of my head and its down hill from there iv been looking for the reson i whant to die for s lng life is just an abstract pichure to me it just whont click at allsome times i find an poit to live for and its always the same thing my gf but i cant tall her that imagine if you got told that your the only reson some ones alive you would freek ! there would be to much to take your holding a life in your hands so thats my gf who has my heart my sole and now my life so now im freeking out that she might be dead… omfg if she is let me have the strenth to do whats right or what i see as right
i love you all stay strong ~”emo hippy stoner nerd”