I don’t want to be dead. I don’t want to live. Limbo is the only answer. Sorry no cheer here- but I do mean the things I posted to threads today. But still- blah.
In a way i feel this is limbo. Half alive but dead inside. Incapacitated in ways that are invisible to the eye. One of the few (actually one of two) reasons that still keep me here is the fear of things being worse when you die. Imagine having the same pain for all eternity but never being able to do anything about it… oh wait, that sounds like life, lol, guess you get my point.
Fun about the posting in threads things. I’d say most of the people that reply to threads in here do so in good faith and really believe what they are posting. I guess it’s really easier to see hope and solutions in other’s situations than in your own.
Yes,Mf agree with the fear death would be worse than this. Yes, not being able to do anything…yell, cry or kick our feet in disgust? Being separated from everything. When I post to others, I’m posting to myself. I need to share and it helps me. And I hope it helps the other person and other posters. 🙂
There’s a lot of people who feel as you do, that life offers nothing, but death does the same, so are trapped in a kind of half-life. I wish I was dead, but then again why do I cling to life, I don’t want to die but feel I have to just to get out of this pointless existence and find peace. I don’t know if you feel the same, that we’re going nowhere, that depression took it all away from us. Death may indeed be worse, who knows, at least in life we know what’s happening to us, in death we don’t know, is it just non-existence as I hope?
Depression didn’t take away my life… it was the response to my family life. And as I understand the events, I understand how those things hurt me. But understanding the feelings I am feeling still is harder! But feelings aren’t to be understood- they are to be listened to, accepted to lose their power.
As I get stronger, the depression gets weaker. But on some days… it is so hard.
I’m not so much afraid of death – as I don’t believe in any kind of afterlife – but one of the things that occurs to me is, what if I try to kill myself and fail? What if I end up some kind of vegetable, unable to talk or move but still aware of what is going on? Or in a coma on life support and then wake up years later? All kinds of possibilities swirling around in my head.
But I also feel like I’m in Limbo. I’m only around to watch my children grow up. Ideally, I could watch them but not be bound to the physical life with all its other demands and expectations. But, I can’t pick and choose which aspects of life I am part of and which I’m not. Obviously. So continues the dilemma. Too painful to live, not quite painful enough to die…
I don’t want to be watching from anywhere. Esp. watching hurting people for my action and I could do nothing about it. I agree that it would be horrible to have bad consequences that leave us in a worse state.
Today is bad. Today I’d go gladly but I can’t. Not even on the worst day. 🙁 I know that is a good thing but I’m not feeling it.
Ever thought that you matter, like really you all (not me of course) cos one man can make a difference. I couldn’t see that cose I was thinking too big. Even with out noticing you can make difference between life and death.
Like I could have been a completely different person. All it would have taken just one man.
Don’t you ever watch the news and think ,,Damn, I COULD have made a difference” but why didn’t you…
10 comments
In a way i feel this is limbo. Half alive but dead inside. Incapacitated in ways that are invisible to the eye. One of the few (actually one of two) reasons that still keep me here is the fear of things being worse when you die. Imagine having the same pain for all eternity but never being able to do anything about it… oh wait, that sounds like life, lol, guess you get my point.
Fun about the posting in threads things. I’d say most of the people that reply to threads in here do so in good faith and really believe what they are posting. I guess it’s really easier to see hope and solutions in other’s situations than in your own.
no cheer!? its a fuckin suicide site…christ, lighten up goddamn disappointing…shocked ur so negative honestly
Yes,Mf agree with the fear death would be worse than this. Yes, not being able to do anything…yell, cry or kick our feet in disgust? Being separated from everything. When I post to others, I’m posting to myself. I need to share and it helps me. And I hope it helps the other person and other posters. 🙂
being sarcastic pretend girl just in case u thot i was serious… but seriously not allowed to be depressed on a suicide forum.. doesnt make sense
I knew you were but I needed to express my hatred of my depression. I am so sick and tired. Don’t worry.
There’s a lot of people who feel as you do, that life offers nothing, but death does the same, so are trapped in a kind of half-life. I wish I was dead, but then again why do I cling to life, I don’t want to die but feel I have to just to get out of this pointless existence and find peace. I don’t know if you feel the same, that we’re going nowhere, that depression took it all away from us. Death may indeed be worse, who knows, at least in life we know what’s happening to us, in death we don’t know, is it just non-existence as I hope?
Depression didn’t take away my life… it was the response to my family life. And as I understand the events, I understand how those things hurt me. But understanding the feelings I am feeling still is harder! But feelings aren’t to be understood- they are to be listened to, accepted to lose their power.
As I get stronger, the depression gets weaker. But on some days… it is so hard.
I’m not so much afraid of death – as I don’t believe in any kind of afterlife – but one of the things that occurs to me is, what if I try to kill myself and fail? What if I end up some kind of vegetable, unable to talk or move but still aware of what is going on? Or in a coma on life support and then wake up years later? All kinds of possibilities swirling around in my head.
But I also feel like I’m in Limbo. I’m only around to watch my children grow up. Ideally, I could watch them but not be bound to the physical life with all its other demands and expectations. But, I can’t pick and choose which aspects of life I am part of and which I’m not. Obviously. So continues the dilemma. Too painful to live, not quite painful enough to die…
I don’t want to be watching from anywhere. Esp. watching hurting people for my action and I could do nothing about it. I agree that it would be horrible to have bad consequences that leave us in a worse state.
Today is bad. Today I’d go gladly but I can’t. Not even on the worst day. 🙁 I know that is a good thing but I’m not feeling it.
Ever thought that you matter, like really you all (not me of course) cos one man can make a difference. I couldn’t see that cose I was thinking too big. Even with out noticing you can make difference between life and death.
Like I could have been a completely different person. All it would have taken just one man.
Don’t you ever watch the news and think ,,Damn, I COULD have made a difference” but why didn’t you…