I really don’t know who to talk to about this or where to go but lately especially my life has been so disastrous?? I’ve felt soooo isolated lately. More so than usual. I have no friends to rely on. No boyfriend. My mom hates me and I can’t stand her, and the only family who I am close to live overseas and I’m unable to get in touch with them. The fact that I have social anxiety puts a strain on everything so much more. I’m so so so terrified to get a job, but I need to get out of this house, I can’t live with my abusive mom and her piece of shit abusive husband anymore. I don’t know how to meet people or make friends. I don’t know if I’ll ever feel like i’m not completely fucking alone in my life all the fucking time. I have been thinking of ways to kill myself, and for me that is unusual. I never do that because i don’t have the guts to but lately things have been so bad that I don’t want to deal with my shitty fucking lonely life anymore. I just.. living is so strenuous. I feel so paranoid and depressed all the time. I don’t know who to vent to or where to go for help. I’m broke, I don’t have anything to my name, and I have nobody in this world. This, right now, is all I have in my life. Thanks for letting me rant though.