My whole life I’ve felt so empty and worthless, it’s like I don’t belong here, I used to be the kind of person who just put on a mask and tried to live life thinking, “Well if I can’t know happiness I’ll just try and make others happy instead.” Bad idea. People will take advantage of you every single time whether you see it or not, no one cares, and the ones who do are only pretending so they can get something out of you in the end. I hate living, hate it. every time I look at my own reflection I get so mad because the person i see is horrible and disgusting, full of pain and misery, I hate that face, and I hate the person behind it so much more. The only person to ever make me feel like I was worth something is long gone. She kept me alive by telling me how selfish it would be for me to kill myself, that I had to think about how it would make everyone else feel. Well after a year of bitter loneliness I no longer care about being selfish or hurting people. I only care about what I want, and what I want is my own death.