my birthdays coming up, and I think I’ll kill myself. Or maybe I’ll wait till the day after, for Friday. That way no one will be expecting me somewhere. i work for two hours each weekday morning. So if I wait till Friday my week is done. I think Friday is the way to go. but I’ll wait and see what I feel Thursday
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I am going to go back and read your post. I am new here. I don’t want to just tell you something stupid and cliche.
I like your poems. Don’t feel guilty. I also hope to go into the ocean one day. Just swim out and keep swimming. For now, I have reasons to stay. My going, right now, would indeed be selfish. Although I agree with those who say selfish is asking people to stay who are never happy only because you want them here. I hope you find reasons to stay a little longer.
thanks for your comment, I love that you went through and read my other stuff. I want peace, I hope to find it by no longer living. I hope peace comes your way as well.
if you need to talk i am here.
I don’t know you but I thought you were nice and I’m having a tough time today and I couldn’t think of anything to say to you that would help. Sorry.
it’s ok, I wasn’t really looking for help, I’m just trying to decide on the day. I really can’t make it any longer. I don’t know how I’ll make it to Friday. I want to clean up first. My room and my car is a mess. I’d like to clean before I go and for that I’ll have to stay a couple more days. I’m done, my suicide note has been written for allmost a month. I planned on doing it when I went to Florida but I was never really alone. and I honestly haven’t had the energy to do it since. But holding on is pointless. it just is, I want peace
actually its a great idea, i will join u on friday 🙂
Peace is certainly something we all want ultimately. I try to stay neutral on things, yet I certainly lean towards living. Either way I’m here for you. Just someone to talk to and express to if you like. I know you want to go on Friday and that you ready to be done. But also know that you don’t have to. A friend of mine from here took their life this past November. I got to know her well enough and she knew me pretty well too by the end. She knew that I would rather she had chose not to. I promised her that I wouldn’t forcefully keep her from making her choice though either. I hope she found her peace. I hope you find yours as well. Please don’t think though that taking your life is the only way. She understood it was not before she took hers. And that is really all I can ask for I guess. I certainly understand the desire and want even though I might not understand the why behind it. I cannot say myself that I will not take my life one day. Honestly as I sit back and look at it……it’s probably most likely that I will I guess…..maybe not. I’m not sure cause I have kinda just accepted for now that I really have no ultimate reason or purpose to even still be alive right now. I am just floating if you will. Seeing if reason and purpose doesn’t perhaps find me again, I don’t know really. Just don’t take this decision lightly please. It’s a serious one. Understand it fully and know what your choosing and why your choosing it. I hope the best for you.
thanks for your comment . I could go on but I just don’t have the strength. Of course there are other paths but they are too long and hard for me to travel on. I just really want to be done. I don’t want to feel this pain anymore, I’m done disappointing everyone, not getting out, not having friends. I’m a lowlife and I’m done.
I remember spending all my birthdays alone. But killing myself on birthday never occured to me.
I like the idea of going out around the same time I came in