It’s been a while since I’ve been on. I didn’t blow my brain out as soon as I was planning. Which turns out to be one of the worst mistakes of my life. I met a girl, and as hard as I tried to not let my guard down, she got past it and actually tricked me into trusting her. Then, after a few dates and saying that she wanted us to be a couple, she basically said, “Nevermind,” on the day of what would have been our fourth date. I fucking hate life, there’s no fucking justification for all of this bullshit.
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4 comments
I’m sorry things went so badly with her.
I don’t understand how people can make such strong attachments by the fourth date. Then again I stalk a guy who I hardly know. Kudos.
Mate she ain’t worth it my friend.
Isn’t it weird that in real life making your saving throw can feel like a bad thing?
Sorry about the woman troubles. 4th dates are usually good for me because by then I’ve got them down in the basement. (I kid. I kid. I would never trap anyone in the basement. It’s way too damp down there.)
Human contract is so wonderful. Don’t beat yourself up for allowing it. It’s so weird to think last February I started seriously planning to end myself and at the same time I was on OKCupid finding dates. I needed to isolate myself to prepare for my death but at the same time I was trying to be social. How absurd, really.
“I weep for you,” the Walrus said:
“I deeply sympathize.”
With sobs and tears he sorted out
Those of the largest size,
Holding his pocket-handkerchief
Before his streaming eyes.
Sometimes we deeply love a person since the first date. No matter how many dates, what matters if the connections we create with a person. Does love at first sight exit? Some will say no, others who found it will say yes. Be glad that girl is not part of your life. It is better be out of the wrong relation on time. Better early than later. Keep going, for all of us, there are some one perfect and unique out there.
SeeSmith, love that fragment of the poem, very symbolic, very real. Thanks for sharing.