Today i realized something. Most people i know think i’m a heartless person. Of course they think this because they do not know what my stepfather did to me. they don’t know what it was to know that you had to give everything up in order to save your brothers and mother. you know what really sucks of that? that those brothers i tried to protect don’t know who i am. They don’t even remember who their big sister is. They just know i’m the girl that “betrayed” their mother. that what mom’s made them believe. And that hurts. But can you really blame me for being like this? For not letting anyone get to close? I mean they’re gonna leave someday and you’re gonna end up alone, so why not skip all the getting close and then hurting me part? really it’s easier that way. I’ve survived 14 years like that. And it’s great to know that the only way i’ll cry is if mom calls me. Though, I don’t enjoy the fact that many people are scared of me. I mean sure carrying scissors in the small of my back doesn’t help. but its not like i’ll actually use them. I have them there because they make me feel safe. But are they right? am I really a monster? I hope not because then mom would be right and i would really hate that.
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If you stay with people who hate you, you will only hate yourself. Its not an advice; its what I’ve felt. This world is a dark place(u already know that) . and to survive ,you must be tough. your experience made you tough, at least that’s the best part of it-
You carry scissors all the time? I don’t think that’s the best idea… doesn’t make you a monster, but how about taking physical defense classes instead?
Women who date pedophiles and rapists don’t want to believe that the person they’re “in love” with or whatever is lowlife scum who doesn’t deserve to live, so they like to deny the truth. You should tell your brothers about what happened, though. Not enough people inform kids of what to do if they’re ever sexually molested. (I.e., tell an authority figure at school and get them to help you talk to the police, or something.)
Yeah, this happened in mexico and currently i’m in the u.s.
Really cool avatar pic.
Truthfully, if carrying scissors helps then just be careful not to stab your back. Still, that is really no way to live. Can you get some therapy maybe?
as for your mother adios to bad trash. i was raised by the worse narcissist on the face of the planet. Growing up it was a war zone. Even after my parents divorced the insanity followed me on really sick levels. Don’t look back, keep walking forward.
Still, careful with the scissors.
I will Haze Day Sunflower. Thank you.