There is nothing wrong with my life. Everything is perfect. But I am feeling so down, so sick, so bad.
I am so scare of failing my suicide attempt. I can’t move. I wont try it, I know it, and I hate it.
I am scared of men, I am scared of women too, I hate living. And yet, everything is going as each and every little thing should go. People are nice and everything is ok. Except my head.
I wish I was different in a deep unconscious way. But there is this part of me that’s rotten and that I can’t heal. I don’t know why. I killed it with my ignorance, and my stupidity, and now I can put some cords on it and make it move like a puppet, but I know it is dead.
Stupid me, stupid ireflexive, lazy, ignorant me. I wish someone could help me, I am crying, calling for help, but there is me, always screwing things up, avoiding every effort to succed. still deaf, still blind.
I could change how I am, but there is me, making it imposible.
10 comments
It’s as if the world is a faded version of itself and you no longer know who or what you are but can’t find a way back. Ignorance is bliss
There is good ignorance and bad ignorance…. like the difference between being inocent and just wanting to be blind.
I don’t know…
I can relate to that feels like a constant battle with myself
And then suddenly out of nowhere I smile.
I am nuts. …
You know
__________Miss. Moneypenny.
Some will goes as far to relate to the simple explanation’s of what’s on the mind or how it hides the truth from us… ” Nothing wrong ”
Simple Definition of nothing .merriam-webster.com/dictionary/nothing
1 : not anything : not a thing
2 : someone or something that has no interest, value, or importance
Full Definition of nothing
1 : not any thing : no thing
2 : no part
3 : one of no interest, value, or consequence
————————————————
Simple Definition of wrong .merriam-webster.com/dictionary/wrong
1 : behavior that is not morally good or correct
2 : a harmful, unfair, or illegal act
Full Definition of wrong
1
a : an injurious, unfair, or unjust act : action or conduct inflicting harm without due provocation or just cause
b : a violation or invasion of the legal rights of another; especially : tort
2: something wrong, immoral, or unethical; especially : principles, practices, or conduct contrary to justice, goodness, equity, or law
3 : the state, position, or fact of being or doing wrong: as
a : the state of being mistaken or incorrect
b : the state of being guilty
Your answer is there, Pure logic is freeing to the mind.
So this describes in its own time that the next statement is the problem.
“”Everything is perfect.””
Perfect would be having a “Hooters Restaurant” for my Livingroom.
I had to read this several times…. But I think I am geting there…. it’s just that the hooters image keeps distracting me, don’t even know why….
if i had the answer i would lend you some help.
Hey Moneypenny
I really like you. You’re awesome.
I’m so sorry you’re hurting like this.
I really want you to be happy.
Hugs
Hugs to you too. I love hugs
🙂