…and it made me want to commit suicide. yes, it was that bad that i have lost all faith in art, theatre, and humanity.
i applied two of my plays to this playwriting competition this year and last year, and got rejected both times. it sucked. last year, i was not able to see the final plays, but tonight i watched this year’s plays.
what. dreck.
the first play was kind of witty, making fun of crappy community college theatre that is up its own butt, poorly written and poorly acted.
the next 2 hours was basically…all the plays the first play was making fun of.
it was awful. i had to say the whole time but i wanted to kill myself to get out of there.
i hate to say this, but the plays i submitted were way better. they actually had something to say, a story, not just a collection of bitching, 21st century pop culture references, and the same bad jokes over and over again.
i wish there was a theatre around here that could produce some of my plays. i really want to tell all the playwrights that their plays sucked but i can’t because it’s not polite.
i’m just fed up of self-important theatre. it’s just like people and life, so self important that they do not care about others, anyone other than themselves. i stayed late to help them, and got some thanks, but other than that, i feel so abandoned.
i have this weird feeling, once again, like it’s just all coming to a head. i went to see a counsellor last week and it helped, but i am not sure that counseling and medication is enough. i am just violently disappointed in humanity.
this might be a shallow post but i really just want a hug and some decent art.
4 comments
1) Why couldn’t you leave? Were you chained to your chair? Why on Earth would you stay for a play that sucked major balls?
2) Why can’t you tell these people their plays suck? Is politeness that fucking important? No, it isn’t.
I say this as someone who can relate to your situation. The other day I was at a songwriter circle, and I brought in a song I consider unpolished, but okay. I get mixed feedback, worse than I had expected. This handsome, kind guy plays a song that, while really skillfully written is… a bit pretentious.
The one woman in the circle gushes completely over it, obviously due to the guy’s handsomeness more than anything. I just want to shoot myself.
I feel bad for saying this, as I actually liked the guy. He was incredibly nice and gracious.
My point is that here I am bitching like a coward instead of expressing my honest, impolite opinion in the songwriting circle. Cowardly.
re: your situation, bitching like a coward is fine. if you thought it was pretentious, probably someone else in the room shared your opinion, at least a little bit. these things tend to not be a solo venture.
for example, since my department is mostly female, there is a lot of “water cooler talk” about chauvinism, sexism, and “man-splaining.” i had lunch one day with one of the other female students, and brought that up, and she told me that she agreed with me that all of the other girls really sh*t on men for absolutely no reason at all, and that it’s absurd to think that just because a man talks to a woman it does not mean that he is “man-splaining” or talking down to her, the overwhelming majority of the time. she also to me that there are other females who think that the women who constantly ***** about men are being unnecessary and ridiculous. she didn’t want to say anything to them, because she knows they would not listen to her because they’re so stuck up their own asses.
1) unfortunately, i couldn’t leave because stupid helpful me signed up to volunteer to help strike sets/costumes/props after the show. and it was so crowded that if i had left, i might not have gotten back in until it was over.
2) these people are people i work with and go to school with. i can’t really say stuff to them. they already make my life miserable enough as it is. if word gets out to the powers that be or the higher-ups, i might get into serious trouble or at least a talking-to that will be avoided if i just keep my opinions to myself and a bunch of randos on the internet, anonymously.