It’s stupid to think that nobody would miss you if you died. Incredibly so, because someone is bound to notice and miss your presence. Your friends, family, pets, that guy you sit next to at work or class. That’s never been the issue for me, I guess.
Ive been doing so good. I thought that maybe it wasn’t so bad anymore. I didn’t want to die, I wanted to move on. Relapse really sucks. I wish…I wish that I had a better time with those therapists. I wish my psychiatrist actually helped me, I wish the pills worked but they didn’t. What a sorry state I’m in…it’s honestly so pathetic of me. I’m 17 for christs sake, I should have this down by now. I’m not a little kid anymore.
My parents are nagging about me getting a job, I have to set college up, I have to pass my classes, my homework needs to be completed, my relationships are dwindling, I’m isolating myself, I sleep too much, too lazy too useless. Nobodies worried, nobody notices, and when they do they don’t dare speak. They don’t want to put up with me, I should be over this by now. I should of had everything figured out.
1 comment
Whats sad is that sometimes people dont realize a persons worth until they are gone.
Then when the persons gone we wish we might have said somethings or done some things that we never did when they were here. Like reach out to them in some way.
I am sorry you are having relapse issues and depression. I hope you are able to push through it. I hope and pray that some big change for the better comes your way.