I’m known well among the people I have been close to for my devious “master plans” , as we call them. This summer I had it all planned out. I had plans to have fun. Reckless, dangerous, stupid fun. These plans have kept me going with the promise of something better, but as I’ve learned so many many times in the past, promises are made to be broken. My bridge to possible happiness has been smashed by a wrecking ball and the rest burnt to the ground. My secrets rummaged through and posted on a wall for all to see and for all to make sure that no matter what, I MUST NOT get my way. Gravity is getting stronger by the day, not just holding me down but pulling me into the earth. Pulling me down down down like quicksand, and they all just watch me disappear with vapid expressions.
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Having a fun time before would be great. I think i remember what fun was like. I can remember once my god parents took me to disney and i punched a guy in the crotch dressed as grumpy the dwarf. I wasn’t even a quarter of the way through my current life then but it was a terrible time then too.