There wasn’t a time I ever didn’t feel depressed. Even with the cocktail of drugs I’m always on. Everything hurts. I miss my dad. He killed him self 5 months ago. Today is my turn. I’m just done. A lot of people say it. Because it’s true. I don’t want to draw this out. I just want to say I’ve been hurting nonstop for 17 years and it’s gotten to the point where I just can’t be bothered anymore. I love my pets, and I feel they’re the only ones who will honestly miss me. Well, I know of about two people who will. But they’re not family. Anyways, just wanted to have something of mine left on this earth. Goodbye.
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3 comments
Dont kill yourself. You are only 17 you have a lot to live for. Dying will end everything, even the pain but still end everything. You don’t want that. Live for those who care for you especially your pets. They depend on you to survive. Don’t forget that
You know how much it hurt you when your dad killed himself. Do you really want other people to feel that pain and loss if you go? You don’t know if pain ends when you die. It might intensify. Why risk it when you can just find out what mysteries are around the corner in his life. Find out what you are here to do. If you would die, you have nothing to lose and can take risks and face all your fears. So go out and do something you were too timid to do before…..ideally something that makes this world better.
Dealing with my mom killing herself is the worse thing I have ever experienced. I think about doing the same and how it will effect my 21 year old son.
So I keep putting it off. Sometimes for months. Sometimes for only one day.
It’s been 15 years since my mom ate a bullet. I’m amazed I made it this far.