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If you could choose any creative way to die, what would it be?

by BlueDiamond

Yes, I mean anything. It could be anything related to cartoons, fantasy, sci-fi, real life, anything.

Mine would be overfed by a tribe of aliens that eat humans. These aliens humanely kill their humans. I would have six months to live, probably enough time to make me weigh 700 pounds. They would feed me anything I like such as McDonalds, ice cream, pizza, cookies, cake, and sandwiches. I feel excited to eat a brownie sundae! Not only do they fatten me up, but they pauper me such as giving massages, keeping me clean, easing any health problems that came with obesity, just sending me love. Then, they could have this play area where I could swing, but I would be too fat and then the seat would break. I’ll have a computer to watch TV, and any video games I wanted the aliens would get it, then when I reach their required weight, or my time is up, they eject me with lots of ********, then I die. The aliens get to have a nice feast.

Realistically, if there were aliens that ate humans. They would probably put me on some shitty diet, so I would taste good. They would probably torture me because meat tastes better when the creatures suffer, and I’m probably at the right weight for these aliens to eat me.

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14 comments

suicideisnotachoice 5/4/2017 - 11:25 pm

Drowning in Kit-Kats bars and Reese’s and Double Cheeseburgers.

BlueDiamond 5/4/2017 - 11:35 pm

Yeah hey, you got the idea!

BIGRICH 5/4/2017 - 11:45 pm

That sounds like a good book idea or a cartoon lol

wanttodie2 5/5/2017 - 1:16 am

By sexual pleasure. I never had any, so maybe could be nice

adeblanc 5/25/2017 - 12:20 pm

You may wish to poke around Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal or investigate Mary Roach’s comment about babies who are born aware that they come with a built-in toy. I don’t mean to make light of your comment, but sexual pleasure is there for the asking. Sexual intimacy is a whole different bag of worms.

Epilogue 5/5/2017 - 4:59 am

Lying on top of a large crate of dynamite just before it all goes off- You wouldn’t feel a thing!

_lost._.one_ 5/5/2017 - 7:41 am

just being shot

winterofdead 5/5/2017 - 1:03 pm

I would like to be shot off into space, so that my body could travel on forever.

SweetQuietus 5/6/2017 - 2:05 pm

In a flotation tank (with the salts cut back for semi-buoyancy) lying naked in someone’s arms, skin on skin, being held and caressed (but that’s too selfish even for a fantasy) in a sort of twilight high, with his voice speaking softly, kindly and music playing in the background and when I am completely at peace, the N is released into my vein.
(PTS for peeps)

BrokenKitten 5/10/2017 - 3:36 am

Find my .exe on the theoretical universe computer and uninstall xD Basically any way that would just immediately remove me from existence, with no fragments left behind so there’s no reason for anyone to feel guilty or anything, they just won’t have any memory of me

adeblanc 5/25/2017 - 12:14 pm

Had I the power, I would live in Palestine, near the border. When Israel did something considered atrocious, I would invite those mortally offended to kill me instead of wasting their lives attacking Israel. I’d invite them to take their anger out on me, then let guilt do its work. I’m 67 years old, you see, and love the notion of leaving that particular mind bomb behind me. Who knows? It won’t be too many years before two doctors will sign off that I’m terminal. I can’t do it now because it would be forbidden as suicide – but if I’m already dying …

littlesoss 10/23/2017 - 5:54 pm

Haha! Do you you what the aliens would be like/look like?

I can’t think of anythnig good right now. The most pathetic thing atm is that I want to lose the two stone I put on whilst I was depressed before I die, so the police don’t find me as an out-of-shape corpse on top of everything else. Yes, I know just how messed up and narcissistic that is.

littlesoss 10/23/2017 - 5:59 pm

Bit off topic, again, but I find it so disturbing that when suicides or untimely deaths make the headlines, there’s about 80 per cent more of an outpouring of ‘love’ for that person if there is an attractive picture in the article, and they usually perceive those people to have more positive personality traits, and therefore a greater over-all loss to society than someone ‘average’ looking. Like just that pattern alone confirms the unfairness and irrationality of society, every single time I see that.

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