I’m off tomorrow, away for a bit. Doing something I’ve never done before – wild camping, far out. I’ve spent most of my life indoors, not being allowed to have my own independence, so my experiences are limited. I’m looking forward to it, but at the same time, I’m not.
I’ve been really slacking, not having the motivation to do much in general (which includes writing this post, took quite a bit of energy to) and get packing and sort out my room before I leave, so I’ve left it to the last minute. This is really stressful.
The long hikes I’ll be taking might drain me pretty quickly, since I’m not used to long-distance walking. What’s more frustrating is that I have back, shoulder and foot pains and have no idea where they’ve come from. I’ll try to persevere regardless.
It’s a good way to just… get away for a while, take a break, away from my usual city and everyone. When I return, I’ll have to face reality again… the reality of failing, not knowing what to do with my life in the next year and whether my family will accept my choice to take the year out. Whether they’ll believe that these issues are more than just a phase, that it’s debilitating enough for me to not be able to progress onto the next year. These thoughts are tiring to think about, so when I’m gone, I’m going to block these out and get the most out of the experience for the first time.