Things I hate hearing when telling people I want to commit suicide

March 22nd, 2018by IMDeadInside

I’m still here, for now. First let me apologize in advance if anyone is offended by this post. Bitter sarcasm is about all I’ve got left. So here are the things I hate most when telling people I want to commit suicide.

Drum roll please…

1. Telling me that suicide is a sin and that I will go to Hell.
Wow, awesome. You just made me feel so much better. Thank you, mighty infallable one! Passing judgment and acting morally superior really turned my life around! How about instead of criticizing me and telling me how awful I am just for entertaining the thought of suicide, you could offer some words of encouragement and support? Too difficult?

2. Telling me that suicide is selfish.
Yes, I should just stop wanting my pain and suffering to end, and cater to your every whim. If someone was twisting your arm and causing you pain, would it be selfish to want them to stop? Or are we supposed to say “Please sir may I have some more?” You know what’s really selfish? People who don’t care about the pain I’m going through, the ones who ignore my cries for help, but proceed to call me selfish because I didn’t think about them.

3. “You just need to learn to love yourself.”
Wait, what? Do you really think I enjoy all the pain and suffering I’ve been through all these years? I know I never deserved the torment and abuse I’ve gone through. Trust me, I do love myself. I love myself and want to protect myself from continued anguish.

4. Telling me to “Go to church” or to “Seek God.”
Seek God? Hold on a sec…. Well, I looked and all I could find was some loose change in the couch, my keys (not going to tell you where I found them), my device to help me find my lost keys, oh, but I found Waldo. Does that count? Sadly going to church was torture. Some of the most judgmental people I’ve met. (The churches I’ve been to at least.)

5. Giving me that horrified, disgusted look.
Wait, did I just suddenly grow horns and a tail? Perhaps a second head? Maybe I turned into an alien? “I’ve come to this planet in search of intelligent life. Oops, I’ve made a mistake.” (Miss you Robin Williams) Come on, I’m still the same person you were talking to a few minutes ago. Show some empathy or something.

6. Silence or telling me “I don’t know what to say.”
Oh, I get it, your thoughts are buffering. I’ll wait… Did you use up your data allotment on thoughts this month? Thoughts get slowed to 1G? Say something! Anything! I vent my frustration and pain, crying out for help and I get silence? My dog showed more empathy.

7. Saying “I’ll pray for you.”
Sure some people genuinely believe that that is helping, but some people use it as an excuse to do nothing. No offense but please save your prayers. When I was being abused and raped my prayers were never answered.

8. Saying “It’s just a phase” or “They’re not really serious. They just want attention.”
No. Just no. If this is “just a phase” how many f-ing times did they attempt suicide? “Just seeking attention?” If I just wanted some attention I’d go streaking on national tv during the Super Bowl.

9. Telling me things will get better.
Okay, this one I have mixed feelings over. Trying to give someone some encouragement and hope is one thing, but can you really guarantee my life will get better?

10. Giving up on me or abandoning me when I am in need.
This one hurts the most. I’m already feeling alone in the world, crying out for help, and they decide that I am “beyond help” and walk away. Way to stick in there, champ! You sure gave it your all. People on the brink of suicide need love not abandonment.

I don’t know any of you here, but I love you all.

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