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Five Finger Fillet

by Mars_42

I can’t bring myself to consciously cut open my own skin, but I found out that I CAN play knife roulette–and the cuts I receive with each slip-up feel much better. Additionally, if anyone asks about the scars, I can just tell them about my “parlor trick”.


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Soda 6/24/2019 - 3:16 am

It’s a very peculiar behavior. Firstly to self-harm because of issues in one’s life. Then to try to disguise the injury as some game and then to feel proud or clever at fooling others.

I’m not putting you down, I realize you’re probably dealing with serious issues. However I’d suggest finding a more productive way to channel those negative emotions, like going to the gym.

You need your body-no matter what you do in life. Let’s say you decided to end your life, that takes real thought and planning. There are some ways to do it with little effort but you still need to be physically whole.

One of my greatest nightmares is to lose my intellect or the ability to use my limbs and be reliant on others. If I ever get an incurable disease, I’m opting for euthanasia before I lose my ability to function.

If my life goes to hell, say I end up homeless, then I am definitely going to end my life asap. Some people are fine living on the streets, but that’s my redline. I’ve suffered enough already so there’s no way I’d let myself experience something even worse.

Even if you hate your life, at least you should love your body or take care of yourself. Who knows in a week or a year your life might become better. But should you decide to ‘exit’ like in my example above, then you’re going to need to be in decent shape to gather the materials you need to bring your life to an end.

Strange Days 6/24/2019 - 4:35 am

This is not meant as an insult but in the literal sense your reply is ignorant. To preach at someone about self harm when you don’t understand it is like some cheerful person telling you that depression doesn’t make sense so you should go to the gym and be happy. Not helpful.

Mars_42 I’ve been where you are, I used to cut myself with rocks and tell people it’s from hiking. It’s not to fool people and feel clever like Soda assumed above. Exactly the opposite: it’s a way of asking for help when you know nobody will help. So you hope just 1 person will figure it out and spare you the embarrassment of spelling it out. But no one ever does.

I managed to channel my physical self harm into other forms of self harm that are more “acceptable”. Drinking, dangerous hobbies, other stuff I won’t mention. It can be argued that it’s not an improvement. But it is in 1 respect. I don’t get judged by people. That’s my advice to you. Society will never understand cutting or even suicide, they will always judge you and make it worse. But lucky for us, drinking is still glamorized, and if you happen to fall off a mountain while rock climbing, they’ll pay you tributes and say what an awesome adventurer you were. Not just some loser who jumped off a cliff. Gotta love society.

shatterediris 6/24/2019 - 5:07 am

Yeah it is honestly really stupid how stigmatized (how do I even know that word?) self harm is…. Also I do very much so agree with Strange Days here self harming in less traditional ways in my experience was more of just a way to feel more normal about self harm. When I was younger I would often provoke my cat into attacking me, and I feel it was mostly just so I could convince myself that everything was okay. (proper attacks, not just scratches but more of her trying to seriously harm me.(I do still feel really bad about this, and sometimes wonder how my relationship with her would be if I never had done that)) It did eventually turn into other things that were likely to have “accidents” and then eventually turned into just cutting…. It’s hard.

Soda 6/24/2019 - 1:35 pm

Strange Days, did you even read my whole post or did you just decide to jump into attack mode because omg, a non-cutter dares to offer advice to cutters.

That is real ignorance coming from you, taking my words out of context and thinking you have some to teach me. If you read further instead of going off on a rant, you would’ve realized I gave him exactly the same advice you did, which is to channel his emotions into something more productive.

I also told him to take care of his body-oh no what an as.shole I am. If he had a problem with anything I said, he can tell me himself. I’m pretty sure he’s a big boy and doesn’t need someone like you to stick up for him.

And like it or not, self-harm is considered abnormal behavior, you know it as well or you wouldn’t be talking about disguising it as rock-climbing accidents.

You guys need to calm down and realize we’re not your enemy, stop freaking out over little things. Two depressed people are not going to talk each other out of depression. Sometimes it takes a ‘happy person’ to offer a different perspective.

Lastly people are giving their opinions on this site, if you don’t like it, then ignore it. Telling people what they should or shouldn’t say because you happen to think differently will just lead to conflict and people not being helpful to others. It defeats the whole point of being here.

justarandomguy 6/24/2019 - 11:41 pm

Jesuschrist you two he poured some of himself or herself ya know 2019, out and ur fighting like bitches fuck me get it together… just jesus fuckking Christ you two

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