I’m still alive…

I’m still here, found some friends who have been making my life better which has helped. Husband and I lost the house, we got some money back from it. And are now living with his parents. I’ve spent some of the money unbeknownst to him and now after 9 years (celebrated our 9th on Sep 27th) I am planning on leaving him. I wanted to know if ya’ll have any suggestions on what i should do before dropping this bomb on him that im walking away. Things have gotten good then bad and now worst, he is always angry at me and is now playfully smacking me in the face. He says its “playful” but i think he is just testing boundaries to see what he can do. He has no issues telling me how worthless i am and how much of a pardon my french but, c**t i am. And how no one other than him could love me because of how i am. I am going to slowly work on getting my precious stuff out of the place we are staying. Like my Nino’s flag he got when he died since he was in the service and my pets ashes. I am worried this will go badly so I plan on telling his mom first so she can be around when this goes down. I am serious this time and am looking at an apartment Friday. I couldn’t have done this without the friend i mentioned earlier. She is so amazing and i am so lucky she fell in my life the way she did. I feel like i acutally deserve to be happy for once and i know that wont happen with him. Any advice would be appreciated! Thanks for reading Snowy! <3 <3