It had been such a good day. For once, it was good.
He and I were texting like we do every day, and then it all came to a screeching halt the minute he told me how some random girl, “about early 20’s” came up to him, said something about how she needed to get rid of the flowers she was holding, gave them to him and left. And he was in awe.
It was all he could talk about, was a stupid girl and her flowers. (Emphasis on the stupid part.)
He texted me, telling me all about it. How she just got in her car and left without a word. How confused he was, how much he wanted to figure out why.
why, why, why.
He asked, “What would you do if a stunningly attractive guy came up to you, handed you flowers and just left?”
When I tell you my heart literally dropped out of my ass. “Was she stunningly attractive?” I asked hoping he would catch a hint. Maybe a subtle, ‘please spare me’ brainwave. Praying to the universe he would say no, but fully knowing he’d say yes.
He said yes.
and like an idiot, I snapped. At that moment I said all the wrong things, but the one I should have said, the one I didn’t say was that I’m so in love with you it makes me physically ill to hear you talk about another girl.
He left me on read; I caved and apologized eight minutes later like a sucker, and he of course, like the clueless, amazing person he is, knew what to say after I was upset.
I feel so dejected.
It’s like he’s a tripping hazard and I’m already falling so hard.
At the rate I’m going, my face is about to smack the pavement and I won’t even realize it until it’s already happened and I’m left picking myself off of a concrete parking lot.
(aka, I’m screwed.)
7 comments
That’s really tricky. I’m impulsively honest like that too.
Idk, do you knowww him, like years? That’s kind of off, though, to leave you on read. Hopefully he’s mature and talks about it with you, and no fights —-
I’ve technically grown up with him in my grade since 6th, but I’d never really talked with him or anything until we became friends my sophomore year. I guess he’s kind of a popular athletic type of guy, super attractive, pretty quiet, minds his business so I sort of steered clear, yet this year we became a lot closer.
As in, we’re always together at school and he’s literally the only other close friend I have besides my bestie who’s practically my sister.
But yeah he’s actually never gotten mad at me before. I’ve had conversations with him before, asking why because It didn’t make sense that I’d snap back or argue and he would just take it. (I’ve grown up where my parents had to be right and I was always left trying to desperately prove my point), but with him there’s never been any fights.
The good thing about him is that he can be really level headed or sensible when i’m the dramatic one. (it humbles me :’) like, he always talks things over and reassures me he’s not mad, but I can’t help but feel like i’m such a burden.
That sounds kind of tortuous, to be that close to someone you feel that way about. Would it not be better to tell him, and possibly reduce contact if he’s not capable of reciprocating?
I definitely would, I’m typically very blunt about things, but were in the same friend group. I really don’t want to mess anything up based on “what could be”.
I think we have a good thing going I guess, the only main problem right now is the tension that others are starting to pick up on…as in our friends, friends of friends, my teachers, etc… So no, I unfortunately can’t reduce contact. And it would ruin everything If I told him.
optimistic spin: the whole thing was a ruse to see how you would react. and if that’s the case then you probably passed? iow the worst thing would’ve been if you acted like you didn’t care. idk i’ve seen people play stupid games like that and they usually feel good when they get a jealous rise out of someone they’re interested in. you got jealous and then immediately apologized – that’s exactly what he would want to see, if he is also interested in you
As much as I wish the whole thing was just a dumb joke or something, I know for sure he wouldn’t do that.
You should tell him how you really feel about him. You never know if he has the same feelings for you. Even if u find out he doesn’t, you can know for sure that you guys will stay as friends. It might also help with the jealousy feeling you get when he speaks about other women. I know the feeling of crushing on someone and getting jealous when she brings up about other guys.