Feeling like every day I dread this damn exercise program. I get so irritated. Problems with my car, ultimatum on my weight loss, arguments and the constant yelling at me for various things, even though he’s trying to help me.
I don’t know if I can even keep this up. This shit is really driving me mad. Not even sure what I can do at this point.
This damn diet, the exercise, the constant do betters and use your brain and critically think. It’s really pissing me off.
I’m going to have to find a 2nd job on top of all of this. Not even sure how I’m going to go about this anyway. If I find a physical 2nd job that’s part time, maybe that will help. That’s how I kept the weight off before…
I’m genuinely incapable of being the person that some family members want me to be. I’m pretty sure I’m not looking to get married or have kids. I completely blew my chances with that when I was younger, and even then, I feel like I don’t vibe with anyone here anyway. Always was finding love interests thousands of miles away anyway…
I’m just a weird person and a part of me has completely stopped caring. And yet I’m still trying to lose the weight and improve myself. Not even sure why at this point.
share your suicide story
Report Post
Please log in to report posts
6 comments
I’m on a somewhat similar thing, diet and exercise program. I’m curious where the ultimatum is coming from?
Mine is just body image issues. Whole life, I’ve worried about getting overweight. Up until earlier this year I’d only had to worry about it once. I thought I’d brought it back under control, but time and age… and a touch of a sweet tooth on my part. I’m terrified of losing my knees. I’m tall, see, and my knees have acted up all my life. My granddad spent his last decade in a chair, miserable, I don’t want that.
That’s the thing about legs, use them or lose them. I’ve had an uncomfortable close up look at what blowing out just one knee will do to a person, so…. eating right, and cycling. I can’t even jog, because the high impact is bad for the knee. I wish I could swim more often, that’s the best for it.
Then there’s my back, that’s a whole other essay of pain and trouble, short version of the story I have to work at it to keep my body working, else it’s pain and misery.
The ultimatum is if I don’t lose 30 pounds by May 1, he’s moving out.
At this point I’m about to just tell him to do what you have to do. I’ve burdened him and all my other family members long enough.
FFS, that’s absurd and awful, I’m sorry he’s done that. You deserve to feel supported and comfortable in your body, but that’s me, one of those hippie body positivity types. Medical necessity causes enough troubles in this world without people being assholes
like I said, I’m just trying to keep use of my knees into the last decades of my life, if someone in my social sphere of influence wanted to make an issue of it….. they can go jump in a lake
I know I’m a fat fuck, although I appreciate the kindness.
I think it’s just not going to be enough for my brother until I start acting a certain way.
I think I’ve lost him tonight.
I know how horrible of a person I am in general. I know how fucked my own head is.
I’m going to see about getting proper therapy, maybe cognitive or something idk.
I’m also going to stop asking my younger bro and my parents for help with things so they can focus on their own stuff and not deal with an ungrateful brother and son.
Maybe I’ll just sell my computers and be done with it. Maybe.
I’m just tired of feeling like nothing I do will ever be enough for anyone. I’ve completely lost the plot and it’s my own fault anyway.
I know it’s not the most rosey place, but I’m glad you’re still around if that means anything. Thanks for caring, even a little.
losing 30 lbs in 1 month is 1- unlikely but also 2- even if you did, it’s not healthy. massive weight loss means nothing if one just gains it right back. for it to a kept off for good, it needs to be a lifestyle change, which is slower but also more permanent. “dieting” – ie losing weight, then gaining back the weight – is definitely not the right way to go. But losing weight is not easy.
Sorry there’s all this stuff going on in your life. Idk what to say. I wish we didn’t all have such shit lives here.
Thanks eternal, I’m just tired of a lot of things as of late.