I keep thinking about my dad killing my mom. I’m the only one he really talks to and every time I talk to him, he’s always going on about how I’m the only one that cares about him and how my mom only wants his money. Or some other grievance he has with her. He’s never been violent to me, but he’s also mentally unstable and refuses to take his medication. My parents live in two different states but I still worry because he has the means to get here if he wanted to. He’s also a retired veteran and has guns. I don’t think he would ever hurt or kill me. I can’t say the same for my mom and the idea of it weighs on my mind to the point where it almost makes me sick. I just woke up from a nightmare about this happening and it felt so real. When I woke up, all I could do was cry. I feel so helpless. There’s nothing I can do because he hasn’t actually done anything, but I’m scared he will.
I might be jumping to conclusions, but the stress and anxiety is real, and it’s eating me alive.