I used to think I was afraid of death and maybe I was years ago. But I recently found some strange spots on my skin and I thought I had cancer. I actually don’t have cancer. It turns out that its actually just some rash or fungus. Its still something I should take care of ASAP but a couple weeks ago I thought I was gonna die. I really thought that I had cancer and that I was gonna die soon. One thing I noticed was how hard it was for me to shed a tear. It actually took lots of effort to shed a […]
It had been a while since I’ve allowed myself to resurface until tonight. It happens every once in a while. There comes a point where I desperately want to feel it again despite the fact that I live in a world full of evil. I did just that tonight. I allowed myself to be this way tonight. I remembered my past and I didn’t focus too much on the negatives of the past. I remembered what my mind was like back then. I remember not knowing many realities. At the time I still hadn’t discovered what violence really looked like. I didn’t know […]
I wish I never discovered porn. It’s destroying my life. I can see how it’s kinda f***ed up…..yet I allow myself to watch it when I’m stressed. I’m not even religious and I know how damaging it can be. If you take religion out of the picture your left with basic human morals. And if you take that out then I don’t know what you are. I know this is a very controversial topic but f*** it. I’m gonna admit the truth on how I feel about this….after all it affects all of us in different and similar ways. For me….it makes me lose confidence […]
I refuse to die at the moment when all of humanity is doomed. I refuse to die in a shocked crowd as we watch bright lights detonate all around us. I refuse to see the look of hopelessness, regret and fear in the faces of fellow brothers, sisters, and all other life as we await our final moments before the unimaginable pain of hell on earth is unleashed unto us. I deserve to die but I don’t want to see these images with my own eyes the moment I die. I want to die a peaceful death. So if I see a bright flash in the sky one […]
I just wanted to say that if you’re someone who’s going through a really tough time right now…..don’t give up on life. Really… just don’t. Stay alive……..Also stop getting so caught up with the media. Stop staring at the screen so much. And give your ears a break with those ear buds and those big bulky headphones. There’s someone out there making a profit off your inner sadness with those things. Don’t get me wrong ….music is awesome but for those of you who use it as a crutch to get through your day need to stop doing that. Stop using that crutch and start […]
I think I’m going down a dark path again…………..Just when things seemed like they were gonna get better…..F***!!!…..this always happens. One problem ends and then another arises, one problem ends and then another arises!. It’s an endless cycle. I wish I could know that things were gonna get better but I just can’t see it. All I see are the 4 walls and the ceiling of my apartment everyday; nothing else besides that and school; which is barely any different. I just want something to change. The only time that I really get to truly enjoy myself is when I’m at lunch with these five other […]
Love is beautiful. It gives you a reason to live. Just go out there and give….. It feels awesome.
My dad is always getting pissed off all day. I think he’s just really stressed all the time. And I get that but he lets his anger show all the time (a little too much for my taste) Anyways so I decided to type this up right now because I just recently witnessed my dad’s abusive parenting?(I don’t know if it was) My dad just got done screaming at my little brother for having bad grades. Not only did he scream at him but he also grabbed him tightly by the arms like he was some kind of dummy and started shaking him violently while […]
So me and my dad don’t get along very well…..we never have. I love him and he loves me but unfortunately I inherited too many of my mom’s genes……too many for him I guess. We’ve never really had time to bond, especially not in a family of 7 or what once used to be a family of 7……Don’t worry, nobody died. My parents just got divorced a couple years back that’s all. But anyways the point is me and my father are 2 completely different people. Sure I’ve got some of his genes in me but not enough to show. I’m a really calm, easygoing […]
It gives you an opportunity to overcome a challenge that will only make you stronger if you allow it to.
It teaches you that it’s impossible to please everybody in this world.
It allows you to realize what others feel when they get rejected.
I got attacked with lots of rejection today but……I’m proud to say that it did not attack my happiness……Today was a great day.
“Don’t let rejection steal your happiness”
My dad drives me insane, and I don’t think I can take it anymore. That’s why I want to run away. My dad has really bad anger problems and their only getting worst as he gets older. He yells at me everyday for the smallest problems in the world. And when I say everyday, I mean everyday …..that is unless I’m with my mom but she can be too careless. And when my dad gets really mad at me he gets in my face and screams really loud as if he were the incredible hulk. Sometimes he hits me really hard on the side of […]
I’m tired of religious groups going out and trying to make people believe in what they want them to believe. Especially the Mormons in my neighborhood. They think they can just come into my house and tell my family what’s right and what’s wrong. They think that they can just tell us a couple lame stories(or scriptures) and make us believe in what they believe. And they may have gotten my family to believe that but they’ll never do the same to me. I’ve got my own beliefs and as long as they aren’t hurting anyone then I’m not changing them. I’m just sicken tired […]
I’ve always been what kids at school call a “loner”. (And I never had a problem with it until people started acting like it was something to be ashamed of. I actually enjoyed my solitude before that because that was just me…..anyways this isn’t a post to talk about why I hate being a “loner”(still hate the way people say it lol), I’m just trying to understand something. I’m 17 years old and I’m currently in my junior year of high school. So here’s the thing; I’ve spent all my years of school being this lonely guy who didn’t really interact much with all the […]
At long last, I’ve found myself……As a kid I’ve always enjoyed my time of solitude. I didn’t need anyone’s company to keep me happy. And I was always this way….until sometime around the age of 1o and 11 I lost myself. I started to let people mess with me. I let them get in my head. I started to let people tell me I was no good. And I believed it. They would tell me that I was weird because I didn’t talk a lot like them. They would tell me that I was weak because I didn’t have any friends. They would tell me […]
The storm that had once raged inside me has finally come to an end. And I’m finally happy with my life again. But I lost something. It’s not completely gone but it’s not as strong as it was before neither. I’m a little unsatisfied to say that I lost quite some faith in God. I’m a happy young adult again but I want to believe in him, I need to. I don’t know exactly why my faith in him has weakened. Perhaps it’s because I think a lot about him sometimes. A little too much in the perspective of science. I don’t know if he […]
I’ve finally defeated my demon that’s haunted my life for the past 6 years. Not only have I defeated this demon that once controlled my life but I have found a reason to live, not only have I found a reason to live but I’m finally happy with my life. Although I can still feel it’s presence, I feel it  fading away day after day. This demons’ chains can no longer bring me down to it’s living hell, not even on lonely days. Loneliness has always haunted my life. But I’ve finally learned how to live with it. I realized that there’s lots of souls […]
I haven’t been on this website for a while but I just came back to say that I’m not giving up. It’s not my time yet. I’ve been lost in life for far too long now. I’m a 16 year old guy who spends lots of time alone. I’ve lived most of my life alone. And I’m ready to live the rest of my lonely life. I’ve had lots of time to think. I’ve realized that this is who I am, I will always be lonely. I realize this was meant to be. Loneliness has made me a strong person. I don’t like being alone […]
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I don’t know what to do anymore…..I don’t know how to live anymore. I don’t know how to live in this world by myself……too long I’ve fought my feelings of giving up…..too long I’ve refused to accept the truth…..I’m ALONE…..and there’s nothing that can change that…..I have tried over and over again…..and all that trying just to fail over and over again….not a single friend made….I was born to live a lonely life…..I Â was born to die alone…..And I’m tired of therapists telling […]
Lonliness….It’s what I feel everday of my life….It’s what I’ve felt for so long….too long….I’ve gotten used to being alone….but just because I’ve gotten used to this, it does not mean that I like to be alone…