I can’t tell you I love you. I mean I told you many times but not recently, it’s been well over a year since we last spoke. You were downright abusive and I told myself I was the strong one for walking away. So I can’t tell you again in person so I’m sending it out into the ether. I love you so much, I think about you every day, no…every moment of everyday. Also fuck you. How is fair that you got to move on and I cannot. How can I feel so much love for someone who feels so little for me? This […]
whatever421138
I don’t really know what to say anymore. I feel the need to express how I feel, like it will gain me some kind of catharsis but it never does. I’m out of words. I hate everyday. I hate everyone; I hate myself most of all. Please can something change? PLEASE. I can’t take this anymore. I’ve done everything you’re supposed to do (prescription drugs, professional help, etc) I’m still doing it. I’ve been strong, I’ve taken this pain and I’ve endured. ENOUGH. FUCKING STOP. I can’t do this. PLEASE SOMETHING CHANGE. I just can’t keep going through the motions. Will this pain ever stop. […]
Non depressed people just don’t get it. I feel like this should be an easy thing for a “normal” person to wrap their happy little head around. Just take all the emotions you are capable of feeling, get rid of em all…but keep the shitty ones. Pretty simple really.
So why why why why why, do “healthy” “normal” people still feel the need shower me with observations about how I’m just not trying hard enough. Allow me first to say that it is true. I do very much need to get my shit together. I’m told I look like crap. This is true. They tell me […]
People like to tell me to give it time, that I won’t always feel the way I do. Well years keep passing and the only thing that’s changed is that I’ve gotten older. So when will this positive change be coming then? I mean it. FUCKING WHEN. I am so tired of dragging my sorry ass about, bitching and moaning, feeling like accomplishing the most basic tasks is a herculean effort. It’s pathetic. My therapist tells me I should fake it till I make it. I’m tired of pretending that I feel something other than self loathing. The days all blend together, all I do […]