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General

For general topics related to the site.

Is this what love is?

by bluesun 7/20/2014

written by bluesun

I don’t form connections with people easily and when it rarely happens the other person runs a mile because I don’t deal well with it. But this time with this one person she didn’t turn her back on me. She listens to what I say for the most part, doesn’t just ignore me like everyone else did and makes me feel like I exist and matter.

I haven’t been coping very well with living lately. We work together in a high pressure environment which has me stressed out for most of time. And the past few days we’ve been arguing which I NEVER do with anyone. […]

7/20/2014 14 comments

by Not typical 7/20/2014

written by Not typical

I don’t know where to turn for help. I don’t know anything any more. I feel like I am drowning. I feel like I need help. No one will or can help me. I don’t know what to do. I just want all of this to go away…

7/20/2014 4 comments

Almost there. Lost.

by Not typical 7/20/2014

written by Not typical

I can’t stop thinking about it. For hours now… It’s on my mind. I just want to be away from it all. I feel like I can’t do this. I don’t know what to do any more. I’m trying to make it through one day at a time. I can’t shake this thought. I’ve thought it all the way through. I am debating almost every day now. I know better, but I am so close. I have reached out for help and tried to help myself in every way that I can. Nothing is working. I really fell worse. Like I’m digging myself a hole.

7/20/2014 3 comments

Should I??

by You Dont Even Care 7/20/2014

written by You Dont Even Care

So I don’t know what to say. But I’ll start here I have a boyfriend. We have been together for awhile. But he can me like shit allot. Well I’m pregnant with his baby. He doesn’t want it neither does his dad. So they want abortion. I’m not sure. I want it but he doesn’t care. He bugs me about it al the time. I feel like all he wants is for me just to kill myself cause that’s what he wants I know so he can just be done with me. Know one understands how I feel and won’t. He also is always looking […]

7/20/2014 4 comments

Hate

by DeathDreamer 7/20/2014

written by DeathDreamer

I HATE EVERYONE. This is not a fucking poem. Why am I still here… I feel a distant pain echoing in the caverns of my heart.

This life I am living is not a life at all. Despair and hopelessness, in 3 years I’ll be 30. Nothing to show for it. No stable job, no friends, nothing left but my insanity. I don’t wanna go on. Can’t wait until it’s over and I’m free

7/20/2014 3 comments

euthanasia assisted death and ********

by meganers 7/20/2014

written by meganers

Hello. I would like information on euthanasia. I would like to know how to go about requesting to be put to permanent sleep or be assisted with the medication. Please help. I do suffer from depression. What is the cost and how effective is it? This not a 6mnth prob or 1 year prob for all d losers who think they opinions on how precious life is matters. I am tired of feeling d way i do for so long. Went on medication n seeing a doctor. I jus want things to be peacefull and the way it can be like that for me is […]

7/20/2014 37 comments

Women, do you think I am ugly?

by KinGinYelloW 7/20/2014

written by KinGinYelloW

This is a serious question. Please be 100% honest, especially if you have bad news for me. I never had a girlfriend. After all the rejections and hurt I’ve gone through bec of women, I cant be objective about my looks anymore. I just hate myself.

I want to find out, if my shyness and sadness is the only reason, why I never had a relationship OR its also because i am just fuckin unattractive to women.

Could u find a guy like me in any way attractive? In my self-perception I couldnt 🙁

ps: i hope i figured out how to upload that picture ^^

7/20/2014 107 comments

World Industries And The Defect. I did not f— this one up.

by Bisban 7/20/2014

written by Bisban

Oh. Oh. Holiness, is dead.
Oh. Killing me softly.
The water, the words, down the drain.
Oh, the music, awaiting for the outlaw.
Hold it, by the claw. The bear, the world needs to blow.
The celestial mad cow, look into her eyes. Take her blood, instead.
From our, hybrid evolution, never evolved. I wonder, our caveman.
The killer clan. The God of Man. I am the only, a Morlock.
God is dead. God is real. My obscure projection into reality.
The new age is the golden age.

Our soul never evolved, only our machines.
The ant, the ant, they grow. What will be, of behind […]

7/20/2014 0 comment

Becoming a Statistic

by seppuku 7/20/2014

written by seppuku

People with a psychotic disorder such as bipolar or schizophrenia are 12 times more likely to commit suicide than the general population. Up to half of people with manic depression (hey that’s me yo) attempt suicide at least once in their lives. 10-15% of manic depressives will end up killing themselves. That’s even more than those with schizophrenia (10%).

I have a pretty severe case of bipolar 1. I’ve had more than thirty episodes of psychosis which ended in forced hospitalizations. I have never attempted though. I don’t want to ever attempt (who does?). If I am to go this route |I want to be successful […]

7/20/2014 6 comments

don’t use gasoline

by gossamer 7/20/2014

written by gossamer

So I doused myself in gasoline today, because I was having another of my apoplectic fits. I did this right in front of my girlfriend, after cutting my forearm with a sawzall blade and scratching my throat with the same.

I guess I just kept driving myself to up the ante. I was working – with lead paint? maybe that matters. Fits of apoplexy are nothing new to me… I was scraping lead paint. The guy I’d given $70 bucks to to help me with my yard hadn’t showed up. Just a down on his luck hobo who was going to help me clear weeds, kept […]

7/20/2014 5 comments

Fighting a relapse.

by Rey 7/19/2014

written by Rey

Hi.

This is my first post. I should probably introduce myself.

I am a 21 year old girl living in New Zealand. I first began to notice a dip in my mood when I was 12-13 but understandably at that age I couldn’t quite get what the feelings were a symptom of. I constantly hit what I thought was rock bottom only to find myself continuing to slide down. I spend years battling it, as well as an accompanying eating disorder, and finally recovered fully in 2013.

I decided to leave home in order to continue my recovery journey. I have been living on my own for the […]

7/19/2014 7 comments

alone

by desiree 7/19/2014

written by desiree

i feel so alone.everything i do feels wrong the only thing that helps is to sleep and drink.to be honest i just want to sleep,drink,and have sex.i should be dead i deserve to be dead but only the good die young,i guess ill be loving forever.please help

7/19/2014 3 comments

I’m so scared.

by DreamingOfDeath 7/19/2014

written by DreamingOfDeath

I keep waking up. I woke up in a pool of blood that one night, a month ago. I woke up. 80 ounces of the hardest alcohol I can afford, twenty cuts later, and I still wake up. I’ve overdosed so many times, on pills and booze it’s like my tolerance is way too high now. I wake up every time. Even as a kid, I’d try at least once a week. I’d wake up every time. A whole bottle gone, and I would still just wake up.

I’m scared, because every time I try to finally die, it just does not happen. I’m scared because when I get these last […]

7/19/2014 17 comments

Too free?

by CatMan 7/19/2014

written by CatMan

Over the past two years, things have been pretty rough.

I’m a fairly successful 40-something, a good job and a reasonable house. I enjoy some great hobbies and am pretty competent in a competetive sport.

However, I have recently lost both parents due to terminal illness and then, because I was unable to support her emotionally, my wife left me for another man. Somebody I knew.

We had been married for nine months.

She was significantly younger then me and, despite trying for a long time, was childless. We had been trying for much longer than we’d been married but it just wasn’t happening.

After she left me, I got […]

7/19/2014 2 comments

stupid ?

by keckis 7/19/2014

written by keckis

New to the site. What does no partners mean in the website homepage?

7/19/2014 8 comments

not quite sure

by br0kensmiLe09 7/19/2014

written by br0kensmiLe09

I’m not quite sure of who I am.

sometimes I like to think that I am a perfectly fine teenager because isn’t the biggest symptom of madness denying you have a problem? if I admit to this I am probably not quite insane, am I?

but I’m too tired too tired to care too tired to live all I want is to fall into a deep slumber forever and ever…

its painful to wake up everyday dreading that you’re gonna live.

life has been deliriously tiring lately I don’t even know what I’m doing. sometimes I wish I could drag that blade across my wrist hard but no matter […]

7/19/2014 5 comments

another option

by keckis 7/19/2014

written by keckis

I can only tell you what is working for me at this moment in time. I am taking a multitude of meds at the max doses and my mind is clear. I still have suicidal ideations and nightmares but I’m a single mom and have chosen for today at least to write this post and give another option. I believe in mood stabilizers and other meds when combined with counseling. You have to put in the effort and tell your drs what is and isn’t working. I know my meds and have tried every combination and strength. Some didn’t work at all. Some made me […]

7/19/2014 5 comments

Today…

by CrimsonDream 7/19/2014

written by CrimsonDream

I would like to inform every lost soul on this website that there is hope. I haven’t concord my depression or anything, I know it’ll be back sooner or later but right now in this very moment I can say I’m glad I didn’t kill myself. The scars are there but you know what? I like my scars , they show me that in a point and time of my existence I didn’t want to live and it makes me feel a hell of a lot better that I could figure that out. I am aware that I’ll be on here in like a month […]

7/19/2014 2 comments

Its all just a messed up joke

by Procel 7/19/2014

written by Procel

Life is nothing but a series of comic fuck ups and disappointments, its like its just waiting for you to want something before it screws you over, u make every step forward that you can, you get everything under controll and one thing just comes along and puts you back to square one. The one thing u want more than anything else is dangled infront of you but u don’t get it. U get to be close enough to breath in its scent but u cant touch it. U get to be right beside it but u might as well be a million miles away […]

7/19/2014 4 comments

Pyromaniac

by DeathDreamer 7/19/2014

written by DeathDreamer

FUCK THE WORLD AND LET’S GET DRUNK.

7/19/2014 17 comments

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