For general topics related to the site.
This is for those who chose to “hold my hand” last night. Questions, answers…..we are ALL pilgrims.
This is Pilgrim, sung by Ruthie Henshall, British musical theater star:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8JEAln3dBE4
people always say that suicide is bad. but, why?
i think if a person wants to leave, they should be able to leave this world without any judgement.
everyone is going to die eventually, so why not now? all the memories we create are going to fade in the end anyway.
There’s always talk about habits like cutting, binging, drinking, ect on here.. But what good habits do you have?
Umm I guess for me, Whenever I text Zoe it’s really easy for me to tell what kind if mood she’s in. I can always tell when she’s upset by the way she texts. Another habit is I meditating at least 3 times a week.
So what about you?
Suicide….it is ever present in my mind…I’ve almost finished with all of the paperwork (will, power of attorney, advance directive, etc). I’ve prepaid for my cremation. The urge just won’t leave me alone or give me any respite, any rest. I think of suicide each and every day now.
I am so profoundly and desperately lonely. I have a constant headache. I could buy a gun tomorrow (this is Arizona where people openly carry them into restaurants)…I could answer the call of the Golden Gate Bridge….I just don’t know. I cannot discuss this with anyone I know, it’s already caused some people to avoid me and denigrate […]
I have become a caffeine addict for the reason that it is easier to tell myself that the unrest and disquiet I feel comes from a chemical stimulus rather than that my own body is unable to chemically stabilize itself. Â It, so far, is keeping me alive. Â Maybe if I can lie to myself, tell myself that this urge to cut, to die, is due to me drinking too much coffee, then I can stay here a little longer?
I want to understand why you guys post on here and what you get from it. I feel like shit and feel very numbly depressed…. and that is pretty much the only thing i feel motivated enough to say on here. None of you know me…. you can’t truly empathize with my problems and you can’t help me. So what’s the point?
You know how, when you actually do sleep, you end up sleeping on your arm? You know that feeling when you wake up, like the arm isn’t there, but you know it is? Well, I no longer hurt…I’m just that “dead-arm”.
I was happy in the haze of a drunken hour
But heaven knows I’m miserable now
I was looking for a job, and then I found a job
And heaven knows I’m miserable now
In my life
Why do I give valuable time
To people who don’t care if I live or die ?
Two lovers entwined pass me by
And heaven knows I’m miserable now
I was looking for a job, and then I found a job
And heaven knows I’m miserable now
In my life
Oh, why do I give valuable time
To people who don’t care if I live or die ?
What she asked of me at […]
Everyone falls off the wagon, and it hurts. So why climb back on? You know you just run the risk of getting another injury. Or, maybe someone pushed you off the wagon…why give them another chance
Dang, I haven’t been on here in forever, it brings back so many memories! I see there’s a lot of new additions to this site. Nice to see some new faces. Erm. Uh. You know what I mean. Anyway, I was just in the neighborhood and thought I’d update on the depression status.
My parents found out that I had been cutting, and they took my knife, blades, safety pins, and lighters away. I haven’t cut in 2 months and 3 days. I have never wanted to cut this badly before. My scars all look like those really cool white ink tattoos and you […]
My piece of shit brother, actually, he’s not my brother, he’s just a piece of shit that has the same mother as I do. Anyway, this piece of shit is cheating on his wife yet again. (Funny she didn’t see it coming, considering their relationship started with him cheating on his girlfriend at the time) and somehow I’m an asshole for being pissed. My youngest sister (who already can’t trust anyone) just found out she can’t even trust family, my other sister is getting shit ’cause she’s taking Tina’s (the wife) side, which I say is the right one. But somehow, our mother is naive […]
If i have plastic bag over my nose and mouth and a scarf tied over that… how long will it take me to die?
tonight is my last night. i’ve already said goodbye and I’m sorry to my mom. but she refuses to accept it. i told her to make sure my note is read by all the people it concerns. she’s in disbelief. my father doesn’t allow me to be upset.
i can’t live with him. it will only be arguing and fighting forever. nothing will get better. and i can’t live without him.
I’m going to see my grandparents one last time tomorrow.
im in the middle of drafting my note. i want to make sure i say everything i need to say.
I’ve tried everything. there […]
but I am hurting, I’m hurting so bad that I do whatever it takes to shut everything off. I want to die so bad, and everyday some part of me tries to talk me out of it. I know I get it I truly honestly do you have to live for yourself make yourself happy do things you want. But I don’t care about myself I don’t love myself so its hard for me it really is. I self destruct, I give up, I have never truly done anything solely because I wanted to. I have done nothing but hurt myself, I have so much […]
I’ve been hearing of allot of suicides in the news lately,allot of young people too.Jumping from a building and in front of a train are the preferred methods.This is a bigger problem than I thought.Why does life suck so much?
The word ‘MoM’ doesn’t only mean the person who held me nine months but let me say ‘ my doctor, my teacher , my best friend and of course my soul. Mommy if you could just see my heart , i will show you the love I have for you and your name ‘Khadijah’ craved in my heart.
I do believe in love from first sight? Do you know why mommy?! It is because since I was born and opened my eyes I saw you and loved you .Years past […]
A vast majority if my life as been spent sedate. Â This may seem like a bad thing. Perhaps it has stifled my coping mechanism. Either way the reality I the situation is this. when I was 16 I attempted Suicide. My parents foun me my stomach was pumped an I spent 9 weeks in the mental ward at the hospital, as long as another 5 months at a day treatment program. Truthfully at that time I wanted help. it seemed to me the more that I tried to use the services around me. The worse I really was, or the worse the people overseeing me […]
When you sink into your low points, the pro/con ratio presents itself. You search for reasons to stay or go. It’s pathetic that a lifetime bottles down into a risk vs. reward scenario.
My question is, do you really need a reason? Do you honestly have to maul over the burdens that make living desirable?
It can be true that most of life’s setbacks are temporary problems. But some linger and will never be resolved. When they continue to stack up and never find a working solution, hope is in decline.
So I find it’s not as simple as hovering over one reason or a couple. It’s […]
Just curious, where are you people on here all from?
PD: Having my ups and downs still, but been hanging in there for a few weeks now. I spoke up to my parents recently, I actually feel better after actually letting them in.
Feeling okay,
PURPLEPAIN
This has been said to me a lot. Did I really get better before? If so, how could the darkness overcome me so hard and fast again? Why doesn’t the darkness slowly recede, but continue to get darker and darker. Maybe I never did get better.
I was forced into therapy and meds about 10 years ago. Well, forced is too strong a word. I guess I could say I was pressured into it. I was just following orders. People know I’m weak and fold easily, will do what they say. Whatever, I’m deviating from the main point of this rant.
So was I better after that? […]
Please log in to report posts