Poetry & Art

For your poems.

11

I don’t know

  May 12th, 2011 by FirstTimeSurvivor

what to title this post…. a very long and difficult day that once again had someone on this site saving me from myself. For the second time in 4 days. Because I feel like I should give something back in return for these two individuals, here is another poem that is being published as soon as it is finished. Titled, “Now I’ve Gone And Done It”

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Somewhere deep in the back of my mind,

I always thought I’d be too scared to try.

But now that I’ve actually gone and done it,

I’m afraid I’ll never be too far from it.

– – – – – – – – – …

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6

Afraid of the day

  May 12th, 2011 by FirstTimeSurvivor

this one is just a few minutes old….  once again, thanks for the cyberspace – FTS

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Afraid Of The Day

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Somehow I feel safer at night,

the demons must sleep then.

It’s around noon when try I might

and death comes calling again.

The daylight burns scars on my soul

when evil comes out to play.

Under the lonesome bridge like a troll,

I am fearful of the day.

– – – – – – – – – – – – – –

Absent stars, a velvet black sky

protects me from myself.

But morning looms, a new day is nigh

and again I go through Hell.

Why am I so afraid of the sun

and the day so full of …

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1

The Last Package – Excerpt

  May 11th, 2011 by Taurus

Good evening everyone,

I’m throwing this post in the two categories that make the most sense; one should be obvious, the other perhaps not so much but at this point in time you could probably tell since this was originally submitted back in 2009 but still holds the author’s original name (Undisclosed).

This piece is part of an extremely long compilation of 200+ writing pieces that no one ever bothered to read, and the consequences with that neglect have made themselves very well known, unlike the author and his other hundreds of writing pieces.

I’m submitting it here so that others who may have more interest in it …

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2

I walk alone

  May 11th, 2011 by FirstTimeSurvivor

Just another poem from today…. I’ve written more today than I have in 5 yrs….

“I Walk Alone”

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Amongst the rubble and the ruin,

smoke hangs heavy upon the mist,

full moon rising, darkness falling,

I walk alone

– – – – – – – – – – –

Black, barren oak trees

form a sullen empty canopy

over the desolate rocky path.

Chilled to the bone.

– – – – – – – – – – – - –

Within the shadows, creatures lurk

and feast on careless souls.

Down this sinister path of life,

I walk alone

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37

Today would be the day

  May 11th, 2011 by FirstTimeSurvivor

like I said earlier…. difficult day…. all of the poems I’ve posted here so far were written much earlier in my life… years ago…. I think the most recent was from 2005…..  this one was written today… about today…..  titled same as the post… “Today Would Be The Day”….. thanks for the cyberspace….

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If it wasn’t for a promise I made,

today would be the day.

To end the pain and all the strife,

today’s the day I’d end my life.

I told someone I do not know

that I’d be there, so off I go.

It seems to me to be so absurd,

but I said yes and gave my word.

If it …

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2

Tough day today

  May 11th, 2011 by FirstTimeSurvivor

Not quite 10 am my time…. it’s already been a difficult day….  sorry for my rants.

Another of my poems…..  hope some one can relate.

this one is appro po for today…. titled “Killing Thoughts”

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No one around to pick me up,

livin’ a life that’s stuck in a rut.

Just sittin’ around, lonesome and blue,

lookin’ for ways to get my mind off you.

– – – – – – – – – – – – –

The sound of my thoughts is all I hear,

those of suicide are the ones I fear.

I don’t like myself or anything about me,

with rope in hand I search for a tall tree.

– – – – …

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2

Tomorrow Beckons

  May 11th, 2011 by FirstTimeSurvivor

Lack of confidence, low self-esteem,

mounting frustration, eyes without gleem.

Signs are they all, of impending disaster,

the end rushes at me, faster and faster.

– – – – – -  – – – – –

With no one around to share how I feel,

it will take forever for my soul to heal.

I can’t do it myself, no not all alone,

can’t somebody hear me? My life I bemoan!

– – – – – – – – – – – –

I don’t have the guts to make it end,

it’s taking too long to finally mend.

Oh! To be rid of this sadness and sorrow!

I turn my back on today and look for tomorrow.

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Thanks …

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0

You isolate yourself

  May 10th, 2011 by steffy

I trusted you.
You were
The only person
I could tell everything to.
I ignored
Other people telling me:
‘Hes an asshole’
‘He’ll just mess up
Everything for you.’
I gave you
The chance
No one would give you.
And you f***ed up
Every chance you got.
I loved you.
When everyone hated you,
I was always there
For you.
But you,
You wanted more!
And me. . .
I found someone
Who wasn’t you.
You got mad
With jelousy
And f***ed
With your friend’s mind
Telling him that
I didn’tlove him!
That i slept with random guys!
I don’t understand
Why would you say
Such horrible things
About someone you love?

I know now
Why everyone
HATES you!
You’re gonna die
Alone,
And it’ll be all your fault,”dad.”

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7

Not Understanding

  May 10th, 2011 by FirstTimeSurvivor

what’s the line in the entertainment biz? “Once more, with feeling!”? Here’s another

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I don’t understand why I feel so bad,

I thought I was over the feelings I had.

There’s no one to talk to or help me out,

I just wish I knew what this was about.

– – – – – – – – – – – – –

It can be so confusing, sometimes I don’t know,

what it is that I do, or where it is I go.

Yes I’m alone, but at times I don’t mind,

it’s just that right now, life is a grind.

– – – – – – – – – – – –

If it weren’t for …

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4

Thank You

  May 10th, 2011 by FirstTimeSurvivor

For all the help and encouragement…. to everyone. I’ve only been here since Saturday, but this place was crucial to my survival through Sunday and yesterday….  I have been encouraged to post some of my writings…. and although I’ve never shared them before this past weekend, I feel it’s the least I can do….. here is another…. titled “If Things Don’t Change”…

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With my feelings,

there’s no pickin’ or choosin’

’cause most of the time

they hide away snoozin’

– – – – – – – – – –

When I look inside

it’s only perusin’

I’m so empty now

my life I am losin’

– – – – – – – – – –

If …

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5

The Love I’ve Lost

  May 10th, 2011 by FirstTimeSurvivor

I know a lot of people are here because they’ve lost some one ….  

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I never thought

I could feel this bad.

I’m so sad and lonely,

what a good thing I had.

– – – – – – – –

It was finer than wine

and sweeter than honey,

I was richer then

but had less money.

– – – – – – – – –

It was so good

and  I didn’t know it,

but now that it’s gone

I’ve turned into a poet.

– – – – – – – – – –

This love that I’ve lost

it’s gone somewhere new,

this love that I’ve lost,

yes, it was you.

– – – – – – – – – – –

These …

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0

Violent Silence

  May 10th, 2011 by FirstTimeSurvivor

Alone with my feelings,

there is no one around.

My head is reeling

from all of the sounds.

– – – – – – – –

They all seem so hazy,

I can’t make them out,

it’s driving me crazy,

I just want to shout.

– – – – – – – –

As I continue to fight

these things in my head,

the day fades from light

and I get ready for bed.

– – – – – – – – –

As people come in

and out of my life,

they all seem to grin

unaware of the strife.

– – – – – – - – – –

The conflicts inside

are strong and yet silent,

from others they hide

but within they are violent.

– – …

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12

Crestfallen

  May 10th, 2011 by wastedlife

Every time I see or hear about someone who has died, been in an accident or killed in some way I can’t help but think “lucky bastard” or “I wish that was me.” Why can’t it have been me that died? why am I still alive when other people die who want to live?

even when I was holding my mum’s hand as she passed I way I wanted desperately to trade places with her. That is an image that I can never forget.

I want to die but I dont want to kill myself, I just don’t see a point to go on living so I …

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4

A new one and an old one

  May 9th, 2011 by FirstTimeSurvivor

First is a new poem, written on Thursday, May 5 2011….. it pretty much explains why I’ve never owned a gun in over 50 years of life…. I’ve never wanted to hurt others….. it is titled “IF I HAD A GUN”

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If I had a gun

I’d show y’all what fun

If I had a gun

we’d never see the sun

 – – – – – – – –

If I had a gun

you’d all still look for some

If I had a gun

I’d be the one you shun

– – – – – - – – –

If I had a gun

there’d be no “we have none”

If I had a gun

it would not be …

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5

An Ending

  May 9th, 2011 by FirstTimeSurvivor

I have been asked to post some of my writings. So hopefully some of you can enjoy them. Here is one titled just like the posting…. An Ending

= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =

The sun beats down

as I lay on the ground,

that is red from all my bleeding.

Shot through the heart,

soon Life will depart,

of nothing will I be needing.

– – – – – – – – – – – – – –

My mouth runs dry

and I begin to cry,

I know no help will arrive.

I know it’s too late,

I accept my fate,

nothing can keep me alive.

– – …

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12

I’m All Through

  May 8th, 2011 by FirstTimeSurvivor

They say it’s a sin,

to feel pain from within.

I don’t know, it may be true.

But if it’s a sin,

it will happen again,

I can’t help but feel so blue.

It won’t go away,

everything is so grey,

what am I supposed to do?

I don’t care what they say,

I can’t face the day,

with this life I am all through.

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4

So Sick of This

  May 8th, 2011 by tryingtohangon

I feel…

Like I’m losing my mind

Everything is crashing around me

I live in a cloud of exhaustion

I am too tired to care anymore

I am sick of it all

I’m smiling in your face

But all the time I wish you could take my place

People tell me that it’s worth it to fight

But I feel like running

Feel like taking flight

I want to reach out to someone

But who will help a girl like me?

I don’ t really want to be

Anymore

I can sing and I have skills

But I just want someone to kill

Me

I don’t even have the energy to end my own life

So how would I have the energy to endure …

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7

My Brothers Death

  May 8th, 2011 by LeighAnn5588

Receiving the phone call, jumping on a plane to LA and taking the elevator up to the 8th floor where my brother was is all a bit of a blur. Walking into to ICU and seeing my brother, broken, swollen, and almost unrecognizable is very clear in my mind. They had to remove the right side of his scull in order to relieve the pressure in his head. His eyes were bulging out of his eye sockets. Blood was slowly oozing from his ears, his eyes and his nose. He was being jerked up and down by the ventilator. …

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2

  May 7th, 2011 by wastedlife

Now I see the times they’ve changed,

Leaving dosen’t seem so strange.

I am hoping I can find, where to leave my hurt behind,

All the shit I seem to take, all alone I seem to break,

I have lived the best I can

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4

Dammit..

  May 5th, 2011 by Silent Screamer

I lost it.

I’m that much of a failure.

I lost my own fucking blade.

My mom found my other 2.

Now me.

Super smart me dropped it somwhere and now I can’t fuckung find it.

I retraced my steps and everything.

Fuck.

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