For your poems.
Tall, proud flowers project
Plucked one by one
Until I am all that is left
No competition for sun
Instead of basking and having fun
I shrink down to the size of a thumb
For I made the other plants feel dumb
Category:
Poetry & Art
You think you’re miserable? You can’t even fathom my misery. You remember every bad thing I ever did to you. How quickly you forget. The things you said and did to me. You know, we could spare each other all this pain.
I know I can change, how about you? Can you spare me all your fucking lies! And all I ask is to talk to you again. But you don’t seem to want to. I wish I could take a walk with you. I would show you all my pain. You took everything I had from me. I can’t wait…to get away.
Will it help?
Probably not. […]
Set to the music “The Fool on the Hill.”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UNfS9Ywb2Cc
I have become the clouds. No feelings, just expression. They only appreciate in passing. A compliment here, a compliment there, their heads turn back, to the ground. Beautiful, for those that look. But I am not beautiful, its just a point of view. Clouds at night, hidden from everyone. Unable to see no matter how hard you strain. Sadness, happiness, productive. Irrelevant. No one understands the work that goes into forming me. The sun, creating a phase transition of water, condensing back down… I form rain, snow, thunder. Some hate, others love. Emotionless either way. Some fly […]
Goodbye, Goodbye,
Tonight I die.
Today, Today
I’ll go away.
Tomorrow, Tomorrow,
Will be full of sorrow.
Goodbye, Goodbye,
I shall not cry.
This world is boring , boring world . why movies, games, anime/manga, fantasy / imagination is better than this world / better than life / real life / real world / reality ?
by niki
written by niki
I hate this world .
This world is so boring , boring world !
Why movies , games , anime / manga, & fantasy / imagination is better than this world / better than life / real life / real world / reality ?
everyday life is the same : wake up, eat, go to school/work, boring, then go back home, eat, then sleep, then repeat again.
but movie / game / anime / manga / comics / books are much more exciting & interesting than this boring life !
for example: like in the world / universe of Harry Potter, Avatar, Lord of the Rings, […]
I found the remedy for life,
I have the remedy for love.
These feelings make me sick
Death is medicine
I feel worthless, but I am not.
I feel ugly, but I am not.
I helped her heal, but I did not.
She found another, but I did not.
She lied, I never will.
She abandoned me;
Perhaps , I will.
Feeling alone again, far beyond the feelings of yesterday
Insanity creeping in gently like a swift blowing wind
Looking for ways to lessen the pain without needles in veins
“Stay sane,” Is what I tell the voices in my head.
Little whispers, “Embrace the pain.”
I think, “Cutting again?” no I’ll refrain
There should be a better way, there always is
Maybe a stare back from the mirror, a slight admiration of self
Maybe the girl across the street a little kiss
Maybe an inspiration from the deceased
As the thoughts rang, it came.
Like an answered prayer
A thought, a pen and paper
I wrote it as I felt it I described it like a painter
I felt […]
I must pick up the pieces
And Put them together
Make sure all the cracks are concealed
So they stay out of sight
The audience must be pleased
Even if I’m not at ease
Don’t trust me.
I will make you believe that I am happy. I will make you believe that I have my shit together and my life is perfect. I will make you believe that everything is going on my favor. I will make you believe that I enjoy being around my family and friends. I will make you believe that I am in love with life, nature and sun. I will make you believe that I always look forward to parties and hangouts. I will make you believe that I’m the kind of person who wants to live as long as possible when the truth is […]
Life? Life? You mean the everyday struggles. You mean the everyday suicidal thoughts. You mean the everyday struggles to get out of bed, because you don’t want to interact with people who will never fucking understand what you’re going through. You mean the everyday pretending to be okay. You mean the everyday faking a smile. You mean the everyday breakdowns. You mean the everyday panic attacks. You mean the everyday being a burden. You mean everyday being a disappointment. You mean the everyday feeling worthless. You mean the everyday telling yourself that everything is going to be okay, when its only getting worse and worse. […]
Life is boring , boring life. why movies, games, anime/manga, & fantasy/imagination is better than life / real life / real world / reality ?
by niki
written by niki
life is boring , boring life. why movies , games , anime / manga, & fantasy / imagination is better than life / real life / real world / reality ?
everyday life is the same : wake up, eat, go to school/work, boring, then go back home, eat, then sleep, then repeat again.
but movie / game / anime / manga / comics / books are much more exciting & interesting than this boring life !
for example: like in the world / universe of Harry Potter, Avatar, Lord of the Rings, Narnia, Marvel / Marvels, Avengers, X-Men, Divergent / Insurgent , Star Wars, The […]
I couldn’t do what you said
This is a death note instead
There’s these voices in my head
Just wanna put them to bed
They’ve been screaming ’bout the pain
That’s been coursing through each vein
I’ve been trying to hit reset
This is all such a mess
They said suicide is a sin
But this game I cannot win
Mama said to hold on to the most basic emotion, love
Love, failed me over and over as I bled from all the cuts,
Cuts, done by unseen sharps as she again let me down,
Down, further in hole than the last one,
I can not be undone, but I am broken,
And none see those hopeless moments
They see the iron-will in me and its all false
In the end it shows, they see as I rot
Can’t hold on for long, I tried
Play the song “When I’m gone” when I’m gone
I hope you read this and know you’re not alone
That the pain in these words you realize as your own
when you look at your scars bleeding red
know that I have them too
That I just wanted to feel something other than alone
I thought I deserved it
I truly did
As I shaped jagged lines I would scold myself for not being better
for being such a waste of life
but the pain always came back
No amounts of cuts changed that
So stop
now
I’ve been on that ledge
I know how much it hurts right now
I can’t promise you […]
I’m very, very tired. I can’t live every day debating whether I should live or not – if I continue living, it’ll stay like this. If I die, I don’t have to deal with this. I know you say it’ll get better, maybe it will, I won’t live long enough to find out. For some reason, I can’t feel happy, even though there’s been cheerful people in the atmosphere. I’m very, very tired. Shall I go about eternal slumber?
I had 4 public speaking engagements in three days, I taught a class and then went to a kick off for a charity walk. No classes this week – spring break. I still have a shitload of homework to do but I am about to leave for Niagara Falls to gamble for a 3 day vacation. I am on the Deans list with honors 4 semesters in a row but I think this class I’m taking is going to drop my GPA. So I joined a couple honor societies while I still have the GPA to be invited to these things. I need something to […]
The end justifies the beginning,
“Take a step to oblivious, “he says.
“We came a long way to give up
You’re at cliff’s edge, one more simple step.”
“Embrace the fall,” he continuous
“Gently let go of the sorrow,
In the end I’ll well welcome you with open arms,
We’ll even sing one of His psalms.”
“Take my hand,” he says.
“There are no holes in my palms.”
I snap back, thought rang, “This is deadlier than reality.”
I smile and say, “let’s try this tomorrow.”
“The loneliness almost had me,
Somehow you came thru with that calming devilish voice,
At least someone to talk to when no one is.”
As far as answering the call, hold on
I’m not ready to […]
lately my mental health hasn’t been too well.
i feel like i’m wearing a mask.
i am the happy and energetic person with my friends, but when i get home it’s like i’m a totally different person.
i always feel so unhappy and i feel like there’s something missing.
it took me a lot of courage to actually type this out.
i’ve started self-harming
i’m surprised no one has noticed all the scratches on my wrist, but i’ve been trying to hide it.
i’ve gone from scratching myself with fingers and biting myself
to pazors and compass points
but i want something more
i want to cut, but
i don’t want to see the blood
see all […]
My treacherous mind lives in the hope of a new world while outside I become an insensitive monster.
The part of me that still feels shout in agony locked in a world full of bullshit waiting for the moment when we both get free. The moment of my death.