Category:

Suicidal Survivors

For those who have survived suicide.

Thoughts & Advice for Suicide or Survival – Suicidals Please Read

by coconut 9/15/2014

written by coconut

I found this site last night when I was in a bad state. I haven’t been suicidal since I was 19 and am now 22, but came here looking for a supportive voice because even though I’ve escaped my battles I still feel the after effects (details in my earlier post). After reading some posts I’m concerned. Remember I have been there and I know how it is. I am being very honest and my comments on how to go, how to not go, motivation and survival preparation are towards the end.

Suicide:

1. If you want to kill yourself that is your choice. Please keep in mind though, death […]

9/15/2014 13 comments

fuck Reality ! Reality sucks ! Real world sucks ! Real life sucks ! Reality boring ! Real life boring ! Real world boring ! movies, novels books, comics, games, manga/anime are better than Reality !!

by niki 9/14/2014

written by niki

fuck Reality ! fuck real life ! fuck real world !
Reality sucks ! Real world sucks ! Real life sucks !
Reality boring ! Real life boring ! Real world boring !
movies, novels, comics, games, manga/anime are better than Reality !!
there is no MAGIC, no SUPERPOWER , no ‘cool, magical’ SUPERHERO / SUPERHEROES like in those movie , novel , comics , game / games , manga / anime , etc etc !
FUCKING BORING real world / real life / reality !!!

I also hate this life, I hate people / humans, I hate reality, I hate this world.
its very BORING […]

9/14/2014 3 comments

There’s no way out

by Sunflowerdaisy 9/12/2014

written by Sunflowerdaisy

I’ve always been aware of the things around me but yet i’m so scaredof everything. i’m a senior and i’ve been depressed for a long time now. Everyone i had turned their back on me because they didn’t like who i was. worse,when it ever came to confrontations iwas and still afraid of standing up for myself and i hate the fact that i’m weak and worthless. I often hide how i feel and disguise it, noone cares about me. Last year i tried comitting suicide a couple of times but failed because i don’t want to die without atleast trying to be happy. i […]

9/12/2014 1 comment

Unprempted Survivor

by Scarlett Dawn 9/12/2014

written by Scarlett Dawn

I thought I had finally found the perfect method. Tbh, I had in my time frame and with what I could get in possession of.

Yet destiny must have thought against my wishes and I was revived in time.

Last Friday night I injected just over 5mg of ithium methadone (not being a junkie, I missed my vien) swallowed approx 230mg of water dissolved fluoxetine cognitive mixture and a bottle of JD to try and OD.
I was in an induced coma for three days then in ICU at Redcliffe for two with breathing, feeding, etc tubes down my throat and needles sticking out of me everywhere. […]

9/12/2014 4 comments

“Not Falling”

by bigjamdaddy 9/11/2014

written by bigjamdaddy

“Not Falling”
by Mudvayne

Always, known in, all my time,
A little left of center now
Reflect as I realize,
That all I need is to find the middle pillar path to sit like the sun by a star in the sky and
just be.
Sinners, casting stones at me

I… I stand, not crawling, not falling down
I… I bleed the demons that drag me down
I… I stand, (for nothing), not crawling, (the center), not falling down (of calms within the eye)
I… I’ll bleed, (for no one), The demons, (but myself), that pull me down (for me and no one else)

Goodbye, sunshine, I’ve put […]

9/11/2014 2 comments

I don’t even know what this post is

by queenofdarkness 9/11/2014

written by queenofdarkness

When “I’m depressed”

comes out of the mouth of a 7 year old,

a kid too young to know what it really means,

you say “Don’t be one of those people, they’re selfish.”

Knowing full well that I am one of “those people.”

Is it terribly adolescent of me

to think,

“Oh yeah? You know what’s selfish? You. You and your fucking religion, fucking forcing me to do things I don’t believe in, praying fucking five times a day, wearing a fucking headscarf every fucking day, pretending I like the sexist homophobic Arab-elitist bullshit that spews out of the mouths of the imams giving the Friday sermons. You and your little victim […]

9/11/2014 1 comment

I tried

by imdrowning 9/10/2014

written by imdrowning

Well i almost succeeded in dying. I was so close i could feel myself slipping away and then i could hear them. my ex-best friend finding me, the paramedics coming in and then the hospital. in the end i guess i survived. I’m still dead inside and have no reason to live. I just need to get out of this life i can’t do it anymore.

9/10/2014 2 comments

im not sure if this is a hello or a goodbye but i need feedback pleaseeeee!!!

by oncehaditall 9/6/2014

written by oncehaditall

hello there fellow SP readers im in need of some advice or guidance im so lost right now and for months the only solution to my problems is suicide.

My problems: Legal issues- im looking at some serious time for a crime im innocent in

Because of my legal issues im out of a really good job and i cant afford my bills and have missed many payments now

Im gonna be paying for my lawyer for the next 10 years for something i didnt do

everyone in my town hates me because of the way the media portrayed me and i cant leave […]

9/6/2014 19 comments

My secret side

by rainofhope 9/4/2014

written by rainofhope

I was 21 when I first had suicidal thoughts. I was struggling at college, and had frequent migraines. The first time was really upsetting -how could I imagine doing that to myself? I kept going, and even managed to finish college. I got a job, and constantly worried that people would see me as not good enough, and wouldn’t want me around. It was hard to sleep. I would agonise over mistakes I could make. I changed job, and things got worse. I had a manager who was passive aggressive and a supervisor who was cruel, insulting us at every opportunity. I attempted suicide twice […]

9/4/2014 3 comments

Inspiration, Hope and Determination

by Unlov3d 9/4/2014

written by Unlov3d

Well, I sure did put my 2.5 cents in today on many comments. I was inspired, for lack of a better word.

Whew. Apparently, a muse somewhere struck me with the writing bug this morning. Or, y’know, too much caffeine to know what to do with myself.

I will be gone for a few days. My mother’s memorial service is tomorrow, and I’m taking the rest of the weekend to remember and honor her. I’m sad she died, but I’m relieved she’s not suffering anymore. I know without a doubt she’s responsible for the events in the past two days. It’s my mother’s undying love […]

9/4/2014 3 comments

My Mom’s Divine Intervention and an Unexpected Gift

by Unlov3d 9/3/2014

written by Unlov3d

Yesterday, I got a package in the mail, but it was delivered to my aunt’s house. I went to her house, and when I saw the handwriting on the package, my knees buckled and the tears started to pour out my eyes.

It was my mother’s handwriting. My aunt explained before my mom died last week, she sent the package to my aunt because she knew she didn’t have much time left. It was postmarked 25 August 2014, two days before she […]

9/3/2014 12 comments

Almost died yesterday

by fallensovietgirl 8/30/2014

written by fallensovietgirl

Everyone was asleep last night, so they couldn’t hear me. Easier that way. I decided I was ready to kill myself, and began to strangle myself. I started to choke silently, and blacked out soon after. I thought I was dead! That I had done it! 30 minutes later, I woke. Probably going to do it tonight again.

8/30/2014 4 comments

life’s choice s affect everyone u know

by bryan higgins 8/27/2014

written by bryan higgins

Some time life’s great tell you realized your quest in life Is Worth it but only to you .in the end do people really care about u .or were u just part of a lust full delusion of an illusion. I’m happy in life and have no real issues to speak of ..but I feel like seeing what’s in my next life .

8/27/2014 0 comment

Understanding the Damned

by KissOfDeath 8/26/2014

written by KissOfDeath

I don’t expect you to understand,

no one ever does.

Our own mental status should be controlled by our own hands.

We are all condemned to death,

so why are we just sitting around?

Like ticking time bombs,

why not handle our own miserable lives,

instead of allowing others to choose our fate.

8/26/2014 2 comments

She just wants to go home…

by Suicides-Angel 8/25/2014

written by Suicides-Angel

So I’m 19…and supposedly a girl who has the world going for me. I’m “pretty” and smart and everyone loves me.

So they tell me. When I was 11, my mom abandoned me to a city who devoured me like the storm devours ships. I was gangraped nightly, used, abused, beaten…..starved, and tied to a bed for days at a time.

I’ve suffered losing everyone close to me, either being left or God takes them from me.

I found a guy that loved me for everything I was….and man I feel hard. And I was doing okay….until May 2nd, 2014 when I lost my daughter, Dylan Michelle…at 6:30 […]

8/25/2014 10 comments

Sometimes, I think I hate everyone

by Engie 8/21/2014

written by Engie

and I just get by by pretending that I don’t. Not inwardly, I mean on the outside. A mask of sanity. I’m a apathetic misanthrope portraying the character of a normal lovable person in a perpetual improv act.

I’m polite and sweet. I listen to people. I laugh at their jokes. I’m considerate. My mind is dissecting them. I’m dead inside.

I’m just not there.

I’m not depressed any more. I haven’t been for almost a year, but I no longer feel complex emotions of any kind. Some would call this a mixed blessing. There is nothing mixed about it. If I had to choose, I would trade […]

8/21/2014 0 comment

is superhero real exist ? are superheroes real exist ? is superpower or magic real exist ? (like in those cool movies, games, comics, novels, books, anime / manga, etc) ? fuck this boring reality / real world / real life !!

by niki 8/21/2014

written by niki

is superhero real exist ?
are superheroes real exist ?
is superpower or magic real exist ? (like in those cool movies, games, comics, novels, books, anime / manga, etc) ?
you know, like in those ‘cool’ superhero movies : X-Men (X Men), Superman, Thor, Spiderman, Iron man, Captain America, or in those ‘cool’ fantasy / sci-fi (sci fi, science fiction) movies : Harry Potter, Narnia, Lord of the Rings, Avatar, TRON, or games like Final Fantasy, Kingdom Hearts, etc etc ..

otherwise, fuck this boring reality / real world / real life !!

I hate reality, I hate life , I hate this very *LIMITED* & […]

8/21/2014 5 comments

The Rope

by KissOfDeath 8/21/2014

written by KissOfDeath

I don’t understand what you’re expecting of me,

your needs a bottomless pit.

Just because you don’t understand these feelings,

doesn’t make me a misfit.

I don’t wish you to understand,

this mind, it’s my own personal hell.

I’m scribbling down my note written in my own twisted fate,

hoping no one remembers to tell.

The rope, hung ever so delicately,

my last and final hope.

The knocking on my door loudens,

as my body begins to mope.

8/21/2014 5 comments

Questions

by KissOfDeath 8/20/2014

written by KissOfDeath

What in life makes it so hard for you to stay?

What is your magic potion?

What has made you stay this long?

What’s the thing you’ll miss the most?

Who do you think will miss you the most?

8/20/2014 17 comments

My Story – Scottish Tornado

by ScottishTornado 8/19/2014

written by ScottishTornado

Since October 2012 I have been living in a nightmare. I was engaged, with 2 children living in a nice house with a good job. Then I made a mistake and I lost it all. I lost the job and then family within the space of 7 days.

I had regular access to my kids until Christmas 2012 when after an argument my ex decided I shouldn’t see my kids. I missed my daughters 1st Christmas, so on the 31st I decided to kill myself. I drove to the cemetery near where I grew up and I took 90 Amitriptyline hydrochloride with a bottle of vodka. I waited […]

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8/19/2014 7 comments

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