I’m done feeling the pain I feel. Let this be read by some who may care. This is final as I’m slipping into death now. The pills are overtaking me I can barely type so I’m stopping.
i’ve always been someone who needs to be someone to other people, you know? having lots of friends who depend on and trust me has been the thing that keeps me going and makes me appreciate myself and my life. i don’t know when exactly i ran out of energy to spend on other people. why did that happen? at some point i became insanely apathetic. i had no energy to try and take care of everyone anymore. i lost my purpose, my calling in life and people got mad at me for not caring enough. why did i become such a bad friend? now i’m […]
I don’t want to live like this anymore.
I know there’s nothing I can say to the image left inside you.. when brilliant light decides to shine through..the dark illuminates behind truth..
And you can leave it all behind you..settle for a life I lied to make myself to seem above cruel intentions for a failed youth..
And i can see it leaves a fever.. my faith will make me a believer.. burning every time I see her put her hands together just to pray for me..
There are many fears unspoken.. more than many bones unbroken.. try to close me when I’m open..but i shed a light to see..
But you won’t see me […]
we decide whether to be happy in our lives or to take everything in a negative way. I learnt a very important lesson in life which is to make people all my friends and laugh with them and have fun, but never tell your secret to anyone keep your secrets for you because some people will listen to you but then they will make fun of you. if you feel you need to talk just write o a paper what is annoying you . just be happy and don’t over think and try to be positive ..
Virtual Reality is an escape from Reality ,
Virtual Reality is the escape from Reality ,
this boring Reality (Reality is boring ) !
this boring real life (real life is boring ) !
this boring real world (real world is boring ) !
boring life ( life is boring) !
Seriously, when Reality is boring & mundane (even real Science is boring & mundane too, science fiction (sci-fi) is better than boring science real ! ) , Virtual Reality is the only TRUE / REAL progress for humanity / mankind / our human species !
with Virtual Reality (VR) technology , we can enter into […]
Believing in Jesus ultimately helped me. Not too long ago I was very suicidal and broke down. I prayed to God and asked him to help me. The next morning the morning news aired a story about TMS to treat depression. Soon after that I attempted to partake in a medical study that offers TMS for depression. I was screened out of the study which disappointed me and I never got the treatment that I cannot afford. Before the treatment I had to get off 2 medications I was taking to treat my depression. It made my condition worse. When I was screened out I […]
I still feel is if I’m still to young to complain or feel sorry for myself yet, I get a mixture of guilt and worry.
But, to put it simply, I believe our existence is meaningless, I feel alone, because I am, but that’s not really necessarily true.
I have some family like a mom and errr- dad, but I’ve never viewed them as companions.
I feel alone, no one can understand me, apparently. I wish my ‘depression’ was very simplistic, but it’s because of a fact that can’t be changed.
I just have no one. Iv’e cried lots till I can’t even if I tried.
I always dream of […]
Running fingers repetitively over scars, hyperventilating.
“No worries. Just breathe. Everything will be okay. It’s okay. Relax and breathe. You’ll be alright.”
“Find a corner. Corners are good. Yeah. Corners are good.”
“It’s okey doke. Things will be okey doke. No worries. It’ll be okay. Breathe breathe breathe. “
When you look at me like that, I don’t get it, I just can’t breathe at all. When you look at me like that, You make alive what I thought it was dead inside me. And all I want is learn a way of how to let you know…
Welcome to your life
There’s no turning back
Even while we sleep
We will find you
Acting on your best behavior
Turn your back on mother nature
Everybody wants to rule the world
It’s my own design
It’s my own remorse
Help me to decide
Help me make the most
Of freedom and of pleasure
Nothing ever lasts forever
Everybody wants to rule the world
There’s a room where the light won’t find you
Holding hands while the walls come tumbling down
When they do I’ll be right behind you
So the plan I had created, exactly October 24, 2012 is still in. And I have to say I am really proud of myself. Because on that day I wanted to go home and kill myself. But I told myself, “not yet, because you’re still a kid. What if your life gets better after your graduate.” So I graduated high school that year, and I made a promise that I will try to community college and then transfer to University, so experience life a little. I decided to let myself try at least one semester in university, away from my parents and family. And try […]
So Uh look at my timeline, ohhh how stong I am to make it this long. Its long fulll of bullcrap. QQQQQQW
Life can be full of pain.
Most people have difficulties dealing with every day life,
and it’s more serious circumstances.
Some people are luckier than others,
they deal with mundane and less serious things.
Some aren’t so lucky.
What led me here?
What led those I have cared for here,
in this down in life state?
Monsters,
they don’t care for the consequences of their actions,
only their selfish gains.
Do monsters feel pain?
Do they know the depth of damage they cause others?
Do they know the lives they destroy?
I don’t believe in karma.
There is no ‘being patient’ for karma […]
Apparently, I am so easily triggered to become depressed about my appearance by seeing pictures of attractive girls.
It’s probably stupid to you, I know, weird
It makes me so upset about myself…..I already hate myself. I don’t need to self harm; there is no positive usage to self harm, but I do it anyway…I feel like I deserve it though…for not being pretty enough, not smart enough, not good enough to live…I’m just a waste of space.
I would kill myself right now, but the fear of dying circles around me, mocking me and laughing at my tragedy.
My whole life has been a living heel since I […]
I was always bullied because of my race. I never done anything about it and I never told anyone because I was afraid. Everyday in school I get racism, pushed and even physical damage. One day I told my parents but they never done anything about it. It’s like they don’t care or want me to settle it myself. I want to settle it myself but I’m too weak and I always think about how everyone thinks about me. Like how I look or how good am I at sports. I did try to settle it but I became emo at an early age when […]
I’ve never been on this site before ever. I’m killing myself tonight but I just wanted to talk to some people before I do. Idk. I haven’t really talked to my friends lately. Just something to keep my mind off of it for a few hours I guess. Thanks homies
Even on my good days, I can’t help wondering why I’m staying alive. I don’t enjoy much, and I don’t see myself going anywhere in life. Why even try anymore?
Hiding. I don’t want to go to the movies with you. I don’t want to celebrate anyone’s birthday. No, I don’t want to visit with you. Please don’t come by. Please don’t ask to make plans with me. Please don’t call. I have nothing left to give any of you. I cannot be a friend at the moment. I’m exhausted by all of you. You remind me of who I was. Who I am presently not. I know you want to see me smile. I […]