Why since we ve been on this planet do we treat one another so bad? All through out history is rape, murder, slavery, war, starvation. So why is it considered a blessing to live?The things we suffer as individuals is nothing really when compared to all that life has dished out to all that has lived.Are we here to further insure that this madness continues .we complain about our individual lives , but what about this blessing called life.Im sickened by the whole history of man.If this is a blessing I would hate to see a curse.when does the madness end? Although I been very […]
It started out with being fired and then it went to trying to come off paxhell! Rapid heart beat…hospitalization for the first time for panic attack. Its been a slow downward spiral for 6 months. Two days ago i realized all this pain is my fault and i can’t take it anymore. I can’t take the ocd and the guilt, the derealization, the pills. I can barely hold down my job. Im afraid im going to give up. I can’t take it. Waiting to see this specialist and this specialist. Im so embarrassed but i dont have the energy to wait anymore. Im so tired […]
I dont know how this site works. What im supposed to write on. All i know is im tired of holding my feelings inside. I was diagnosed with a Chronic disease in 5th grade, and i almost died. What didnt help was kids telling everyone i was faking it or teachers telling me “you couldve done your homework while you were having an mri” etc. My dad is basically a zombie. Ever since both his parents died and he lost his job, he has no emotions. Hes never happy.. He just sits there and types on the computer. My mom is always yelling at me, […]
Sometimes I wonder what the point of all of this is? When those thoughts start running through my mind I can’t help but wonder what it would be like if I ended it all. However, I don’t want to hurt the small amount of people that actually care about me which is why I haven’t and probably wont ever do it. It’s still depressing to have all of these thoughts. I really wish I didn’t. On some level I feel guilty and I feel like maybe I’m taking everything for granted. Compared to others my life is pretty normal I suppose. At least now it […]
I am 24 years old, i have been fighting depression for about 4 years now. It all began when the girl i was in love with for 5 years was raped and she became different and left me. i have attempted suicide once and failed, i was locked up in a suicide watch institute for 3 days (worst thing ever they take everything from you and you sit in silence wanting to die even more) luckily my sister worked there and got me out. My current gf recently left me because i was too depressed of a person, i loved her with everything i had […]
It’s funny how we all live in this huge world to be known by some but feel forgotten by everyone. I walk in the streets and they may see my smile but they’ll never know my stories.. They’ll never know the truth behind this face. All the lies of happiness and all the stories of fake laughter. When will be the day that people can see beyond the “joyful” eyes and see what’s really beneath it all <\3
I’m 36, I’ve dealt with suicidal thoughts for years. I’ve attempted it a couple of times. I’ve been sinking back into depression again and I want to die. I have a son, who is the only reason I haven’t ended my life yet. I worry about him. He’s a cutter. My boyfriend and I are having problems. I think he’s cheating on me and last night we had a physical altercation. I’m badly bruised and sore today. In 2 years, he’s never done that. I don’t know why he is now. I have no one to talk to. I’ve thought about taking pills and driving […]
Everyone has their own overwhelming burdens ….. non are less than anyone elses….. mine have just become too great. i have lost my children. I had all that i could ever of hoped for…. i was adored by a beautiful perfect lady and i screwed it up. No…. not like that…. i just screwed it all up. I am not a bad man… i just have had so much pain over the years i didnt know how to just enjoy life when it became perfect.
I am now completely alone…. just wanted to say goodbye to somebody.
thank you.
Hello. I’m Bella. I’m 15 years old and I know what it’s like to go through depression. I want to help people that went through it too. Mine was from loosing my best friend on Easter night and then having his funeral on my birthday. I didn’t get to talk to him that day because I was busy with my family, but I have now made everyone with depression or problems a priority. I was in therapy for my depression because I talked with my mother about it. I was mute for almost FOUR whole months. Now I try to look at the […]
Yet again, I can’t trust anyone. My “friend” left me last night cause I told her what I trully was. She said she can’t be friends with someone who’s depressed and stopped talking to me all together. I just feel like shutting myself from the world and go mute. I’ll just talk in sigh language when I have to.just completely shut myself from the world and hopefully die before I’m 20 🙁
I just got married, and I feel so badly for my new husband. I’d love to talk with y’all, but I can’t think of anything else to say.
Hi my name is Ariel and I’m thirteen. This is honestly my last resort. I know that when people see “suicidal teens” they assume that they are “faking it” but I assure you that I wouldn’t be doing this unless absolutely necessecary. I am so scared. I tried to sleep a little bit ago but I couldn’t with my racing mind and I have been so scared that I think I might throw up. Basically, I am a very big over-thinker. Very, very big over-thinker. Lately I’ve been thinking so much that I actually don’t feel like myself and I cannot express in words how […]
Hi, my name is Susanna. I’m 21 and been struggling with my entire life. And coming to the end of my road, feel that it’s meant to happen.
II’ve been through so many things in past that i wonder myself why i’m still here. Childhood went me trying to crow myself. My mother has been too depressed to take care of us, i’ve been in foster home where I’ve been beaten and sexually abused by my own brother, and by his friend. I have an eating disorder, anorexia nervosa with bulimia, had as long as can remember, been crowned to it. My ed isn’t the only […]
You wake up in the morning – happy as can be. You strive in life to put a smile on anothers’ face, but struggle to put one on your own. The evening comes and the thoughts wander in – What if…wouldn’t it be great…how would others react it…
Ive been through this website a few times as I struggled to keep myself from making a second attempt. I read about how others feel, the struggles they go through, the stories that match mine.
Having a constant loss of happiness is the worst pain. The moments spent creating little notes and looking up various ways of attempting. The […]
my best friend, my second half, for years we wanted to kill ourselves together, a suicide pact. And a couple days after my birthday two years ago he hung himself. And I can’t deal with the guilt I don’t want to wait anymore to die my time is soon. I have no right to live. I just want to be with my second soul in heaven anywhere but here. I’d rather see blackness for eternity alone then to be here one more day not being with him
It’s been a while since I have been here 1 year. I deleted my other posts to start fresh.
I tried to be happy until up about a month ago. I tried to be positive. I ended up right back where I started and I don’t want to relapse. But it’s so hard. I feel worthless. Sometimes I think to myself is life worth living? But then again I’m just sad and I need to stop. But I can’t. These thoughts over run my mind. I just don’t know anymore.
Remember that time when you were truly happy. Truly happy despite all the crap in your life. Truly happy despite the people that wanted to see you sad. Especially happy for the people that liked to see you happy. So incredibly happy, that you didn’t even realize you were happy. You just were there, and everything was more or less alright.
wasn’t that a good time.
…
now you have a burden to carry.its all you can think about.
Why do I feel this urge to help others here? Even though I understand what they are feeling? (I can’t say I understand completely or I know how it exactly how it feels)
He is imperfect. Short, freckled, quiet. Intelligent with stunning blue eyes. Depressed and anxious. Heart broken and ostracized.
To me he is perfect. But he has been gone for quite some time now, locked away in a mental hospital I know he abhors. I didn’t know how much he meant to me until he wasn’t there. My days became more dull, I stopped smiling as much. I became sensitive, I holed up in my room, dreaming impossible dreams of a life with him.
I began to forget his voice. His beautiful face. His small stature compared to my tall one. The notes we would write each other […]
I believe that some people feel more so than others. The amount of sadness it’d take one person to crumble is what another wakes up to every day. You will never know my pain, nor I, yours. We can describe them as best we can, but I will never know what it is to carry your burden, and vise versa. I feel as though my own pain is much greater than most, as obnoxious as that sounds.. I live in a constant state of anxiety. How do others see me? Am I annoying? My breathing is too loud. Am I performing this task too slowly? […]