I’m so tired of being a punching bag. Why do you have to push all of your ideals, veiws and bs on me. I’m wearing out real fast now and I have no idea how much longer I’ll be able to last….
If you hate me so much now and have regrets the why the hell did you even keep me ariund.
Well dont worry. You know my favorite saying a man is known by the silence he keeps… I guess I’ll take that saying literally and become silent forever.
In this life I have learned that being loved or belonging is an illusion. I have learned in this life that the way to get close to people is to be something they need. If some arbitrary trait isn’t proven or provided to others then a person is left lonely, disrespected, and unloved. I don’t know if I have ever felt real love or bonding with another human. I don’t know if I have known a person to be selfless and kind spirited without some ulterior motive. Whenever I put myself out there and begin to trust the world I am reminded of how truly […]
On October 26th, last Thursday, I ate a handful of poison hemlock seeds I had researched thoroughly. I was so ready. I had prepared all summer. Ready for peace, or nothingness, or heaven, or hell, or my next life, or a reset. I want to die, and I’ve wanted to die for a very very long time. My chest and gut physicaly hurt when I think of having to push on for 60 or so years living only for my friends and family. ..the seeds are from a camping trip. I know hemlock. The leaves, the flowers, the colors, the smell, and yes, the taste. […]
I honestly don’t know what to do. Everything’s slowly coming apart at the seams. I’m falling behind in all of my classes and hardly paying attention to my parents. I’m unattractive and most of the people that I hang out with just think of me as really annoying. I bet there’s a line of people waiting to try and kill me. Hell, I’ve even stopped reading books as much as i used to. And it’s not just that I feel unmotivated. I just don’t know what to do anymore. I suppose that’s what it’s like when you live your whole life doing what people tell […]
We need to get a hold of Jim Carrey. Hit me up for this. Pilgrimage.
just wondering whos from these areas? i currently reside in kent but am from london.
you know your born into this world and for the first copal of years of your life you think hey what could go wrong? sadly you soon start to open your eyes and see the world for what it really is i don’t know much about any of you just anonymous bloggers like me i guess but i know one thing death is unavoidable wether it is from natural causes a tragic accident or self inflected. sometimes you don’t want to die other times you know your ready like me i know i want to die i know that theres nothing anyone can do to […]
Is it possible that there is a force bigger an even more capable of destroying me than just the society, the world and human beings this planet is.. Like the saying I have heard and used so many times before ‘the universe is against me’ Maybe yes it is yes it really is. I have tried so many times through my life to try and figure out why…. why me, why is this it, why was I born. what is the point of all this the point of life well maybe there is really no point who ever came up with everyone has a purpose […]
“No matter how hard you try there will always be someone better´´ This statement is to do with girls ovcourse, Its something a family member of my age said to me when I told him my story. He said that’s a lesson he’d learnt from his very sad love life story. But i’m not here to tell you his, I’m here to tell you mine and maybe find some confort between all us injured men.
I dont knw where to start… its a very long story (arent they all!..), so i’ll try and summarise: I’d know this girl for 12 years, for two of those we […]
but this is the last straw,
its my birthday in a couple weeks (27), i should be excited and i have alot of things i still enjoy. i can walk, talk, see, smell and hear. and that alone should be enough. I made a list of all the things i appreciate in life, but i look at my list and i dont feel grateful, maybe its the media or the 1st world society problems that i think are so terrible. but im just done with it. every day i wake up and i raise my hand to my head and “pull the trigger” just hoping that […]
I’m sorry but, I can’t take it anymore… the nightmares get worse, my family seems to enjoy my suffering and online… things just seem to be getting worse, I can’t take it, I have no means of escaping the pain anymore…
I….. I have to end it all tomorrow, final chance for everything and everyone… Not like it’ll matter…. not like any of them will notice… :'( I’m sorry for not being good enough for you, I hope you find happiness, where I failed to provide you hope. :'( Good bye…. forever. :'(
But, please know, I didn’t want to do this to you, I’m not ending […]
My dads’ cousin just hung himself. I’m not going to the funeral – I met him maybe once and barely remember him. Yet it makes me feel… I’m not even sure what. Sad doesn’t quite cover it.
I’ve been thinking about suicide myself for several months now (have considered it many times before, but this is the longest prolonged period where it has seemed the only solution). I guess that just always makes me feel sympathetic to those who do go through with it. More than a year ago an actor, rather famous in my country, killed himself. I wasn’t all that much of a fan of […]
I should end my life, tomorrow’s the big day after all… No one will miss me, no one will care, Tomorrow is the only day I’ll have to myself, NO ONE WILL TAKE IT AWAY!
Tomorrow, I die!
Sliced wrists, Downed pills, and a rope around my neck! I’m making sure I die this time! GOOD BYE FOREVER YOU HEARTLESS MONSTERS OF THE WORLD!!!
So this certain thing had to happen
Does everyone go through it?
Why? Why must they feel such pain?
For one person…
They came in,
Wrecked our minds
But we had the decency
To think about them
Dream about them
Start loving them…
They’re the wind to our wings
The Sun on our cloudy day
But he’s my sunshine
The gold in the rough
Im delirious
Smiling about him in the day
Crying about him at night
I can’t sleep or function
What should i do?
Kill myself?
He’s no ordinary
He’s extraordinary
Is this Love?
Could be, how am I suppose to know
My […]
My name is Jammy, I used to write a lot, i used to read a lot, i used to draw, paint and climb everything i looked, I also used to pull my hair, crash my head against the wall or fight my siblings when i was mad, and all nights i used to cry until i felt asleep, Mom couldn’t look at me when she came tired from work so she used to send me to the backyard at nights, first I was scared (just as every kid would) but then I start it to like, i enjoyed it being there but that wasn’t normal […]
Where’s the Halloween party be at. Hit me up
I hate this day completely.
I quit my job and moved across the country so that I could afford living without a job while I apply to grad programs. At the same time as studying for the GRE, I got engaged to be married. You’d think it would be a really exciting time in my life, but the same two months I was going to use for improving my GRE score ended up being dedicated to wedding planning. Wedding planning was a nightmare, I felt extremely depressed, and then I would beat myself up for feeling depressed during a time I was supposed to be happy. Oh yeah, I forgot […]
So useless.
Can’t do anything right, can’t do anything well.
Good-for-nothing.
Filled with envy.
Filled with hatred for oneself.
I just want to sleep, sleep forever.
Once upon a time ago, there was a little girl that honestly couldn’t have pictured a more perfect life. She was a successful athlete, had friends, a great girlfriend, but apparently that just wasn’t enough to help her survive. Where she grew up, if you were a good athlete you were automatically popular, so she was popular. But she didn’t like feeling superior to others, so she kept the friends she grew up with. However, they weren’t athletic so this girl that once had it made was now getting talked shit on by the whole high school. Why would they spread such harsh things about […]