Im sick of this pain after school ends i’m gone i’m finally going to do it… my body is deteriorating from not eating from the 7 ibuprofen i take when i get home from school and when people try and don’t you dare say its selfish i’ve tried and tried to make people listen but they all ignore me i’d rather be dead than to deal with this pain…I’m tired of the pain I can’t handle it anymore I’m sorry but this is goodbye
I’ve been cutting at work, probably not the best idea but I mean, I’m alone there for 10 hours a day with nothing to do but talk In a mic. It becomes inclusive at that point, I don’t know what to do anymore at this point. Grr
It’s almost 2AM. I’m in my room alone. Crying my eyes out wanting to die. I haven’t felt this way in over a month. I look at my scars and notice them fading. Why are they leaving me I don’t want to see them go. They’re such a big part of me, I swear they’re my closest friends. I’ve tried everything to clear my mind, but nothing seems to work. I’ve tried snapping a a rubber band, I’ve tried drawing a butterfly,I’ve tried all I can think. I don’t know what wrong with my mind. all I know is that it’s back. The urge to […]
As a mmo gamer I find myself tragically stuck in the role of tank. I can’t help but feel life beats on me a little more than others. It is selfish to think that way, because everyone is fighting their own battles, playing their own parts, but sadly I think I am just to perfectly fitted to this part. My nature is to protect, to take the first hit, the last, and each one in between. I feel like I care far too much to fit in properly in this day and age. The only thing I want is to help people smile, and to […]
Im kinda hesitant in posting this… I was raped by my father when I was 7 years old. I still remember the blood that was everywhere after he finished his thrill… What kinda person does that to his little girl, over and over again? I am now 25 years old. and I cant seem to get over this… I literally feel like screaming all the time. I am trapped inside an adult body. All I can ever think about is suicide. I dont want to live with the memories of something so horrible.
My dad was a crackhead. He’d allow his drunk/ high GROWN men to […]
About 5 months ago , I had a horrible night . My moms drunk boyfriend was fucking her in the living room and made me sit next to them and kept yelling “Your next little one!” ( it keeps replaying in my head still this day ) and I sat there crying. Obviously he wanted to have sexual intercourse with me. When he went to bathroom to use it , I ran out of the house. I hide in the dark underneath cars hiding from my moms boyfriend ( lets call him H ) , he was yelling my name like a concerned father. I […]
The girl that always seems to come back to me one way or another in such a way that i want to control but emotions,memories all coming running back. I cant seem to move on, Ive tried so many times to forget but its not enough time because she comes back to me. Being broken up now for over 5 months, being together for a total of 3 years its hard to just forget someone like that. Are we meant for each other? Its her family that worries me…. They hate me…I don’t want to be hated for feel uncomfortable around them. What do i […]
This is the first time I’ve posted on this site, having discovered it only a few days ago. Well, posting for myself, anyway, because I’ve actually given shout outs to a couple of other people that I hoped could take the words to heart. But I continue to wear my mask, even here, in the presence of those who’d likely accept me without it. But, truth be told, I wear it around friends and family that I’d gleefully step in front of a bullet for, so it’s not entirely surprising to me.
I’ve felt the urgings of suicide for the better part of the last 25 […]
My internship which requires me to wake up at 5am is starting June 9th, and given my night-owl tendencies, I’ve subscribed to sleeping pills – the first dose of which I’ve taken a few minutes ago.
Talk about putting the drunk in the driver’s seat…
Does this stuff even work?
I’m 16 next month… i cant take this anymore. I’ve been through so much. I believe God makes our plans before we are born and this is part of mine. I tried telling people but they think I’m being dramatic or I’m not serious. I wish someone understood. My friends know but they cant help me, they tried. I cant help myself anymore. I’ve been harming since 6th grade but it isn’t helping anymore. I’ve become a raging ***** to everyone and i dont know how to stop it. All i do in life is hurt the ones I’m close to and break everything i […]
Days like today make me recount the week that I was hospitalized and my mother was the ONLY person who visited me, aside from my fiancee, who expressed the entire time how much he didn’t want to be there and constantly found excuses to go do stuff somewhere else. I’m so lonely. I’m not sure what it is about me that just repulses people. Nobody acts like they truly want to spend time with me. Right now I’m sitting alone at my kitchen table while I watch all of my fiancee’s friends play the new Mario Kart 8. There’s nowhere for me to sit and […]
It’s been 3 years since we said goodbye. He wanted it to last, I wanted it to end. I knew I broke his heart, but I had to do it. I was nearing my end, and I had to end us before I ended myself.
I didn’t tell him that reason though, I told him that I was too immature for him. He deserved someone on his level, a smarter person, someone unbroken. I wasn’t ready to take on the responsibility of someone else’s feelings.
I removed him from facebook, made my profile extremely private, and made my last status.
The rope wasn’t strong enough.
He’s always been in the […]
hey guys so this is the first time ive been on a website when ive been suicidal….
im just not sure if i should be alive… i feel like  there are some people that are just meant to die early and I am one of them…i have been thinking of this for a while now… really dont want to live anymore its just too hard… if anyone wants to talk i would love to
dont wanna put this shit on anyone i know but feeling really down
How does one find hope when having a terminal disease? How can one withstand all the pain it causes while knowing it’ll never end – only gradually evolves, gets worse and finally eats you alive? Is hope even a slightest of possibility?
Expecting a miracle perhaps gives something to keep one’s head up. But preferably person just has to accept the facts; this really was perhaps my unjustified destiny and the clock is ticking ever faster like it has for so many people before me. Fear, tears, a mountain of hopelessness and beside me a conjurer of never-ending agony and despair.
Where do those people […]
i’ve decided that i’m done; i’m done with everything, and i’m ending it. goodbye
To be honest with you, I don’t remember the first time I did it. I never really cut at first.. It was more like scratching. I used to get my key and scratch my arm with it. It hurt… That was all I wanted at the time. That began over a year ago.
Why did I do it, you may ask..? Well I felt so helpless, I had no control over anything in my life and I thought that it would help, but it was more than that too! I felt numb. Nothing made me feel anything, but when I scratched myself, I felt pain… And […]
It’s hard for me to even type this out, to be honest. I’m a very private person, one who rarely lets people in on the darker aspects of my life.
All my life, I have felt worthless, pathetic, weak. People have abused, violated, and abandoned me without any regard. And I let them because I am too weak to do anything about it or unable to.
Suicide crosses my mind at least nine times every week. It infests my mind when I’m not even paying attention and always makes sure to make its presence loud and clear when my situations are bleak. My chest constantly feels heavy except […]
This is my first post so hey,
Imagery is a weird thing isn’t it?
Since I was 13 I’ve had that sort of ya know emoish look about me, listened to the music, wore the eyeliner, all that sort of stuff. At that time people couldve somehow assumed, because of this “image”, that I was rebellious, depressed and suicidal. But what’s ironic is at that time when I was going through that sort of “phase” none of that applied to me in the slightest. You could say I was one of the most friendliest, world loving emos our there aha.
I was “a goth” before my dad got […]