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I don’t know what to do anymore. I’m lost and no ones helping me find my way. I’ve fallen out major with the person who saved me, I want to talk to him but he’s deleted me from everything except my number. Seeing him happy without me at school breaks my heart because I’m not happy without him. I miss him so much. Makes it worse when I’ve got to spend a week with him in Poland with my school. It’s going to be so awkward.

I’m even making myself go deaf by how loud my music is when I have my earphones. I like to […]

My best friend since child hood was hit by a bus five years ago while he was roller skating the image is still with me today. He wasn’t just my best friend he also taught me love has no gender, no age, no color and now hes gone. I feel guilty that he died because I was going through a phase that I was just being a shut in and not talking with people I feel like if I just called him earlier that day he would still be with me hopefully that’s what I tell myself and its what I think and what I […]

My life is falling apart, things that I didn’t think could hurt me have managed to get inside my head and I don’t know how to get rid of them. I haven’t open up to anyone because just the thought of it terrifies me. I’ve only ever opened up to one person in my life, she was a therapist and she ended up lying to me and sharing my secrets with people who she knew I didn’t want to hear them.

If this is how humans live on this planet, I don’t want to be part of it.

My conscience says that our life can be way better. Each human that sprouts on this earth is special. And has right to get all things that human race developed till now. But it’s not happening.

The first and foremost one must do ” strive for intelligent human beings on earth”.  or at least let dumb ones know the fact ” He is dumb and don’t deserve to extend his genre”

intelligent: If problems comes, find a best or innovative solution that no one had thought. 

dumb: If problems comes, suicide or a poetic […]

I’m so tired. To tired even for a proper cry for help. Or maybe i don’t care. I don’t know.

For anyone who has attempted with overdose, I was thinking about OD’ing on my antidepressants. How does it feel, is it very painful?

when people say stay strong things will get better i promise.. it never turns out to be like that in my case i get over everything. and it comes back cuz of something else happened to top that problem..
feeling like shit and nothing going right in your life. called whore by your dad and telling him to pack your things cuz she dont want you living with him anymore. then moving in with my mom everything starts getting better then BAMM you get raped by your step dad then end up getting a bf that same night and scared your gonna lose him your […]

We listen to objectively vulgar, demeaning, and strange music. The lyrics hold meaning that are not widely accepted by society. To me, and I’m sure plenty of other teenagers, the lyrics hold a different meaning. Those who know serious emotional and psychological struggle see those lyrics as refreshing, and symbolizing an encouragement intended to help deal with the struggle. That’s how I see it, anyways. Opinions are like anuses.My generation astounds me, negatively and positively. They act out particular behaviors that are cliche for a teenager, but these “punks” are still human beings. They have the same brain every other human has; only teenager brain’s […]

I tried to do it about 3 days ago. I tried to take my own life. It was a situation where it should have happened, and I was prepared for it. I had written all my notes to everyone who would have cared and I cleaned my room so it wouldn’t be a hassle afterwards. I was ready and I did it. I drank bleach until I couldn’t take it. I knew the end was near and my peace would soon come. But my peace never came. I woke up the next morning drowsy and in pain. But 3 days have now passed and the […]

Good thing-I feel like I’m starting all over.Time to do things right.

Bad things-Sure there a lot of beautiful girls but none of them are you.None of them have your eyes,none of them have you voice.I thought my first love had a beautiful voice but then I heard you and now sometimes before I go to sleep I hear the voicemails you left me just to hear you.I have yet to meet a girl that’s like you.You were everything I looked In a girl and more.I’m not young anymore.I want to settle down.I could honestly see myself settling down her.She used to always worry about her […]

Its what we all seek ultimately whether we want it or not, is it not true? We search this world for someone who understands us who can accept us and love us, thats the dream. To mean something to someone, at least based on my perspective how can I mean anything to myself if I mean nothing to no one? When I was younger I always wanted love I mean I never truly had it I was drunk on the idea of love and in my mind love was the only thing that could heal my brokenness. I found love, it was amazing truly and […]

My counselor asks me what I’m going to do when my mother is gone.  Then I’ll be on my own and I’ll be forced to learn how to be viable outside the womb… haha.

I make hints at my true intentions, but she doesn’t seem to pick up on them.  All she knows is that it will be tough.  I told her that there would be nothing, but perhaps I think differently than other people.  Nothing to me signifies blackness.  I will neither see nor feel.

It’s the only choice given the circumstances.  Nobody can spare me from being stuck here the rest of my life.  So […]

im actually so sick and tired of the problems i have with my boyfriend. All he seems to do is blame me for everything but i honestly cant see what i have been doing wrong. Then he just chooses to ignore me instead of actually telling me what i have done wrong. We havent seen eachother in 3 weeks because he is always ‘busy’, but hopefully i should be seeing him this weekend but im really doubting that. I really don’t know what i should do? Any suggestions?

I’m not here,
I’m not there.
You can’t find me anywhere.
I have left,
I have gone.
Cause everyday
made my life wrong.
What people do,
what people say.
” I hate u”,
” Go away.”
I tried to keep calm,
and have no fear.
But it got too much,
so i disappeared.
I took a rope,
and made a bow.
Put it around my neck,
and just let go.
For a second there was pain,
but soon there was no more.
As the life in me left,
my body went limp and poor.
Nobody knows,
nobody cares.
I’m transparent,
as thin as air.
People’s […]

Standing here
all alone.
Everyone left me.
I’m on my own.
what did I do?
What did I say?
To make them go
so far away.
Nobody wants me.
They don’t care.
They say mean things,
and give an evil stare.
IT really hurts,
inside and out.
I just want one thing
to change my life’s route.
I want someone to love me.
One who’s life i’ll share.
Someone who’s always with me.
Someone who’s always there.
I know who it is.
It’s always been you.
So kind so brave so bold.
The one who’s always true.
I want you in my life.
perhaps one […]

I’m going crazy.

I’m going insane.

All my thoughts

inside my brain.

i can’t take it.

Make them go away.

I am so confused.

Don’t know what to say.

I really need someone.

Anyone will do.

Someone i can vent with.

Someone I can talk to.

I’m so young.

Why is it I can feel like this?

All these emotions,

putting me into an endless abyss.

So many tears

I often cry.

I don’t know what to do.

I don’t even know why.

I’m garbage.

I’m shit.

i am done.

This is it.

So many doors.
Don’t know which way.
Nowhere to go.
Nowhere to stay.
I hear voices,
inside my head.
I hear things creeping
beside my bed.
They say i’m different.
They say i’m crazy.
I don’t do anything.
They think i’m lazy.
If hear voices
they give me shots.
Oh so much medication.
Pills? I take lots.
The people in my head,
they give me so much pain.
But now I know the truth.
I have gone insane.
In my home
I share with many,
each person has a room.
For there are always plenty.
We are all so different,
but yet we’re all the […]

nothing good comes from you
here is something u can do
take a rope and tie a not
leave ur body cold and blood running hot
let it out and let it pour
see it all over the floor
dont wake up and just stay down
if ur still alive u”ll make me frown
i”ll send a bullet through ur head
and make sure ur forever dead
nobody wants you and nobody cares
your heart deserves the hate it bares
goodbye you piece of shit
you’ll be in hell in a bit

its done

its said

im gone

im dead

no one misses me

nobody notices

what was the point

im better where im at

if i see a tear

i know its not for me

i wont be in the way anymore.

goodbye