Fuck caring ,fuck all those tears i cried for you
Fuck all the time i tried to make shit right
Fuck the lies ,fuck the pain! Fuck being the only one who ever stuck up for your ass
Fuck all the “i love you” ,fuck the fact that i gave my heart to someone who just walked all over it!
Fuck all the cheaters ,fuck all the backstabbers!
Fuck all the people you thought were your friends ,fuck all the betrayals ,fuck all the manipulations!
Fuck all the feeling were hurt ,fuck the trust , fuck being there for you!
Fuck all the late nights […]

today i morn the loss of my good frends dan edwords i fownd his bodey this morening he was a frend and a brother to me in his note was a letter wich he had read befor me its was open (for a few weeks hed been opeaning my letters for some reson) and he put a note inside saying “do well i love you dont …” the rest was to messey or coverd in blood to read so crying aand stagaring on my feet i take it from the guy who has just given it to me and i reed the note but i […]

I want to say hi
But do I dare?
I don’t want to be annoying
I don’t want to be clingy
I always start the conversations
Maybe you’re busy
I don’t want to annoy you
But I worry
So much
I guess maybe another time
I’ll say hi…

I’m sorry
I panicked
I didn’t know what to do
I promised you something
But I broke that promise
I feel bad now
I couldn’t do it
It’s difficult for me
To do that action
And now I feel bad
But I don’t want to bring you down
And I don’t know how to make it up to you.
I just
Panicked
I’ve never done that action before with someone like that
And I didn’t know anything about it
I broke my promise
And
I’m Sorry

nihilism: highest values devaluate themselves. the aim is lacking;”why?” finds no answer.

does any one experienced nihilism?

if so how to cope with it? is suicide is the only way to get rid of it?

I found a picture on tumblr, and it’s pretty funny, because it reminds me of a few years ago. In that time, my breakfast also looked like that. But that picture also made me realize that I’m going back to that time…

Okay it’s Saturday………Exam day oh yeah but guess what police came to my house at 7 in the morning to take my parents car (we got them but back ) I had a huge panic attack I hate police so much and I had to go down there and now all my neighbour know my family is in debt ……………….oh yeah I meet my new therapist I kinda like her ………..gone to study before the exam thou wish me luck imma need it

i think its safe to say from what has just happund no one cares about me at all

i think i need to think for a bit

so long

ok so i came back after a wile and theres so meny people here i dont know iv just come back outside of a acting jpb that has made me to bisey to check up on people and its all my falt now i think its cos i was in the forcis (dont ask cos im not going to tell) but i feel like ok frends gone… get new frends then i know somewere inside that most of the people i knew are ether dead theres no two ways about that one then theres some who may just be hiding in the depths of the sp and […]

did you ever see that film into the wild if you havent stop reeding go on netflix and spend 2 houres of your life in the presents of artistic wonder rely good film any way the man in the film is troubeld by the welth and greed of the world and gos to hide in the wild he is poetic… any wayi wish i could do that just pick it all up and role on out with jacey and stick a midel finger to the world and this cost of liveing we all haft to have i feel srry for the world you know i […]

befor the days were i bent down to pick up pecis of my sole my eyes were bright my hear was long and i didunt cear as long as the sun shone high in the sky but the das are gone were i have time tolook at the sky in a world were i hafe to pay for “the cost of liveing” if you look at it its a joke the cost of being alive… im sorry but what the fuck

At home and alone lone is the only time i let my really feelings show. All sadness, pain and hurt. I try to tell people i really do but i just don’t want the looks that you get after. Not only of worry and pity but also the looks of disbelieving from all the people who believe there is nothing wrong. That it’s all for attention. When really your hurting inside.

sorry if the title misleads but I have come to the realization that where I cut is not helping me anymore.. maybe my body has adapted and realized what im doing.. well I see this vein going along my bicep.. that’s going to be my next area of cutting! its a long vein so I can make a long cut and let just the blood flow

I suffer from low self esteem and confidence, I don’t have anyone to talk to and pretty simply find this is the only way I can cope with my emotions. I don’t have an outlet(other than here) to let go.. I […]

I give people hints all the time that i need help.. mentally physically and emtionally i cry out for help all the time and no one will just open their eyes.. UGHH. I hate life.. I recently watched a really good movie on netflix. It was called the suicide virgins it was really really good yall have to watch it.. It made me think .. i flushed my blades so i cant cut but ive been thinking of so many other objects to use i just cant do it i made a promise  i know if i do one ill keep doing it .

Hello

My name is not important and I have been experiencing suicide ideation and fantasy since I was 10 in my memory , likely earlier, 6 as reported by my mother.

I am 21 now and things are more or less as bad as they usually are in my perception. I struggle with self-criticism, anxiety, depression, etc, worthlessness, hopelessness. You know the ropes by now.

I know there are people that love me and people that care, which makes things all the worse. Usually my ideation and fantasy has more to do with the concept of “un-existing” or “erasing” my life. It’s not a spite or glory or […]

My boyfriend who “loves me” is messaging his ex, saying they are close friends or whatever . Well I don’t like it, it’s not that I don’t trust him, it’s about respect and if theirs no respect in a relationship then theirs no relationship.
It’s not the fact that he can text her a storm and rarely message me throughout the day no, but for him to get upset about my feelings?
He wouldn’t like it of I were to be messaging my Ex, no, no, no he wouldn’t. You know what else he wouldn’t like if my Ex messaged me saying […]

So I got this worksheet thrust at me today (and she even compared it to school homework) about “my intended change.”  Hmm, somehow I think this is going to be harder than writing an analysis of some uncommon piece of Victorian literature.  And far less interesting.  Thing is, I’m not sure how I’m supposed to do this on my own.  What else is new.

My intended change:  I told her pointlessness.  Also in the running were boredom and loneliness.

My main goals for myself in making this change:  Um… I don’t know.  To make life not suck?

I plan to do these things…

Other people could help me with […]

Really sucks when you tell your family that you are suicidal and the first words out of their mouth is “you’ll burn in hell”. WTF!!! That’s the furthest thing from my mind when i’m holding the razor blade to my wrist. She did not even ask me why I want to do it and still hasn’t. That was over a week ago and I saw her today and told her again my suicidal urges are growing stronger. Even told her about my dreams I have been having where I go to my own funeral after I commit suicide. Still nothing. I am not telling my […]

Hi Guys,

So today was a reaaaaaaaallllllllllllllyyyyyyyyyyyyy good day. 😀 I’m actually kind of crying of happy tears. 😀

So let’s start off. Normal routine with school and stuff, BUT I GOT TO MEET SOMEONE THAT I’VE BEEN DYING TO MEET. And oh my goodness. I’m just really happy. Of course me being the awkwardly social human being I am I just blushed and didn’t really speak. (Sorry about that, Michael). And it’s just amazing.

I finally feel happy for once. I’m finally smiling. 😀 It’s just great. And the best part is that when I got home from where I was, it was about 11:00ish. My sister […]

What is the true definition of perfection?

Entirely without any flaws or defects

We are all perfect in God’s eyes. He made us from his own image.

You might be thinking:

Why did he do this to me?
Why did he put me through this?
Why can’t anyone else see what he sees?

You know I don’t really know the answers to these questions either because I was asking them too at one point in time. But one very wise person once told me:

He only put you through this because he knew you were strong enough to handle it. So don’t loose Faith in him. Don’t give up Hope. For he knows […]