it was december 20th this happened to me. it was the last day of school before winter break. i had gotten an e-mail from my friend, Cassandra, who is the transportation coordinator for my hometown school district (and the best friend i ever had) the e-mail was shocking to me. it basically said that she can’t be my friend anymore. i felt the world crash down on me. i cried for a maximum of 5 hours, sobbing away like i had nothing better to do. at this point in time i just want to die. i’m dropping out of school because this happened to me […]

I don’t know why my mom hates me I’m just tired of life 🙁 I hate thinking suicidal my mom is always proud of my brothers :'( but not me I just miss being loved by my family I hate being the black sheep every one in my house thinks I’m a whore or slut but only if they knew I was rape:(

“Wiping away these invisible tears that have been hiding behind this smile for all of these years everything that you’ve known about me has all been a lie cause the girl that you think is happy is wishing to die.” ~ Ana Chable

If you have ever felt like there is no light, no fulfilling happiness, you can’t find happiness…? You’re where I am. I am empty, hollow really. There’s nothing here… I don’t cut myself on my wrists, it’s too obvious. I have cut myself on my thighs, cuz no one sees them there. I’ve tried everything to Gain happiness… Sex, drugs, alcohol, suicide, animals, nature, friends, family, counseling…. But nothing helps. I don’t have a smile on my face for very long, if I do, it’s probably fake and it’s there to keep people off my back.  I look fine on the outside, but inside… I’m […]

Nothing makes this person want to blow their heads off or take an overdose cocktail more than the holidays. Nothing brings up anger, sadness, discontent, loneliness, and every bad moment in life than the holidays. Having a birthday close to Christmas and having to deal with the fa la la la la bs really doesn’t help. So yeah short and sweet: This blows in more ways than one. This blows and makes me want to blow my head off!

School was the worst time of my life with constant bullying.i had so much anxiety that i felt i was dying from inside.diagnostic with cronic depresion because i have it sinve 15 i am 18 and iam still depressed.my parents didnt understamd through what i was passing.i had so much amxiety i waked up and puke .everything i eat i puke it.i was white as milk.dying slowly.when i could make it in my school for so much bullying i changed.but in my new school i was so depressed and sow low.i didnt make any friends.and when i did they where skinheads.they introduce thos ideas that […]

Have any of you seen this crazy,awesome cartoons.i am 18 and i am a ig fan of them.(maybe because i am a pothead)they are so crazy,abd hace so many subliminal messages.my favourite cartoon is ice king,a sociopat which loves to kidnap princess.this cartoons talk a lot about a mistical paralel life.a fourth dimension.its really interestin i realy recomend this cartoons and if you ghave a joint you will crack out.
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It’s hard to read all the pain in these posts.  Why?  Because I’ve been there.  No one to spend Christmas with.  The one time of year when everyone else has family and friends to share the time, and I had no one.  It hurts.  Especially, if you are depressed to begin with.  Reaching out is hopeless.  Who wants a misfit around?  Christmas time is indeed the saddest time of the year for people like us, because the fact that we don’t fit in stabs like a knife.

It was at times like these that I’d listen to Jackson Browne’s Hold On Hold Out, again and again, […]

I know it is hard to say/see coming here, but be happy for what you got!

Enjoy your time with family and friends and enjoy the christmas together. Don’t take it for granted!

remember; there are people living in poverty, wishing your lives to be lived. they would love to spend a holiday night together, with tables full of food, drinks and whatever they can wish.

I know that me myself, I wont probably live to what I have said here, but that doesnt mean you dont have to! Even though i dont know any of you and i probably never will I hope you all enjoy […]

Hey, I’m Anna, I hope someone can message me and we can talk some, check out my profile ~

I’m struggling with my own life and most of the time i think that everyones life will be a whole much better if i’m not around, so most of the time i feel like self harming or just ‘falling’ of a building because yes they will be sad but after a few days they wont even remember my name, for most of my life i have been bullied for being different and i never feel like i fit in any where even when at home, when i was young my parents kept agueing and then they split up and seeing my mum go pretty much […]

I don’t think I can go on in life, I’m going to move out with my sister so she can start her life and then I’m going to kill myself. Maybe with a gun? Pills? Who knows, I just can’t find any worth in myself, I’ve tried so hard to get somewhere in life but it’s not working.. I can’t be happy. I know when I move I’m not going to be any happier because I’m a nobody and nobodies go no where and aren’t worth anything in this world.

Today’s one of the days that I just feel like letting go. I want to just let go of this world and disappear. No one will miss me. I’m alone even in my own house. I hid these feelings from everyone because I thought I can control it. It sometimes comes out in my stories that I write or poems. I pretend that I’m okay, but I wish I could express these feelings. People look up to me to cheer them up when they’re sad. No one is there for me. I just want to disappear. Once I do, no one will miss me, no […]

the scars get deeper every day. it takes away the pain. my parents beat me. people are always telling me to go kill my self or that im a worthless slut. ive tried getting help but no one understands. people are always tell me that it’ll get better but they don’t know anything!!!!

It would be different if anyone remembered why we are supposed to “celebrate”. We were supposed to celebrate the birth of the only mortal incarnation of a supreme being; the only human incarnation of the deity that supposedly created humankind and gave it free will. Then out of ‘love beyond all understanding” gave us the mortal incarnation to take the punishment for the evil we chose with our free will so we wouldn’t have to suffer just and eternal retribution.

But what is the “buzz” all about for this sacred season? Hundreds of thousands of bank accounts put at risk because of a security breach ay […]

that night I just got home from my friends and my brother raped and beat me.

Today I’ve come to the irrevocable decision. I’m going to go out my way.

I haven’t fired my pistol in 15 years and I’ve cleaned it, oiled it and gotten fresh ammo – nice heavy ugly looking jacketed hollowpoint bullets. I want to test it first to be certain its still in good operating condition. I can’t get to the range before the 27th and probably not until the 30th. If it functions okay I need to strip it down and clean and oil it well again. I plan to jump from a bridge (not the Golden Gate) and shoot myself in the head as I […]

Another perverts gotten me mad

this will be my final post on here,

yesterdah at 11:32 pm my mother passed away.
she didnt care for me but still.

ive decided my demise,
im going to hang myself its the easiest way.

ive written my offical will and note.

i love my little sisters and I hope they wil stay strong without me andunderstand why.

bye.