Every morning I get up and head towards the bathroom. Only recently I realized I was avoiding the mirror, so today I looked. Now I know why I avoided it.

Your mouth cuts deeper than the sharpest blade…

so kiss my wrists and hope my heartbeat fades.

What’s one sunny day to endless rain?

A muffled cry for help…in vain.

That blood on your fists, I know is mine

But fake the love and i’ll be fine.

Hmm? I said ill be just fine.

Just lie to me most every time.

I don’t know why, but there’s this emptiness inside of me that’s carving me out from the inside and leeching through my skin. I don’t understand it though. I’ve had a really nice day, and then bam. I want to curl up and cry, slicing my skin each time a tear escapes. I got a detention a few days ago for something stupid, and school has become hell. I don’t remember what it’s like to have an actual weekend, let alone life because I’ve been going back and forth between people’s houses while my dad looks for one of our own. I don’t think my […]

it seems no matter what i do, it doesn’t matter. i guess i have to understand that. i have decided to stop lying a while ago, for many reasons. it’s wrong and because it has only ruined my life. i dont lie anymore. i try my hardest to do everything right and i also do that because i care. i care more about him it seems than i care about myself. and that’s not good. i love him more than my own life. thats not good. i have no meaning. whether i live or die, i still refuse to go backwards. i refuse to be […]

i am shutting the world off right now. i am going to sleep and i need at least 24 hours to sleep now uninterupted. lights off. everything off. sound off. life off.

he just said “more of me hates you then loves you.” im not living like this. HE IS IGNORING THE TRUTH! I AM NOT LIVING IN A WORLD THAT I CANT GET THE TRUTH THROUGH TO HIM. im gone.

he can hate me for the past, even though i dont want him to hate me. but he cant hate me for the present. it’s not fair. he hates me. and all i want is to kill myself. I’m doing the right things now. ive been doing the right things. and it doesn’t matter. he is upset so he is ignoring the facts. he wont believe me even though im telling the truth. i dont know what to do. all i want to do is die. i know i ruined everything. i know why he cant believe me. but that doesn’t help anything. what im […]

It hurts when I hear your name,
It hurts when I see your picture,
It hurts when I read something that reminds me of you.
It hurts to miss you a lot.
It hurts to be alone.

i really want to die. i am done making things up. why cant he see that it would be so much easier to just make something up that sounds believable so we could stop fighting? i know it sounds hard to believe because it seems too good to be true. i dont know what to do. what can i do? why cant he see that not making something up at this point to stop fighting is doing more harm to me than good? i cant do this. i dont know what to do. i really just feel like dying. he is completely ignoring the facts […]

I cant take it anymore
I have nothing left
People say i have talent
People say i have something to live for
That I’m smart
People dont realise i can’t live up to their expectations and call me a failure when i say it. No i cant go to oxford. No i cant go to Durham.
Im tired of the hatred and the rumours and the name calling

Im tired of having to cover up in bandages to hide the scars, tired of nobody understanding why, tired of pushing people who care away from me, tired of causing pain to everyone i meet and im tired […]

I guess I like this song enough to want to share it?

I needed somewhere to write for a couple minutes.

Just feelings. Unconnected ramblings that swim in my head every time I feel like I am not strong enough.

You’re welcome to read, or gloss over me. That’s fine.

What do i do when i think something is in the past
and that i am no longer affected by it
because its just a distant memory, right?
But then… and then something happens
something tiny
and something inconsequential to everyone but myself
and it’s like
suddenly it matters again
suddenly it seems like just yesterday was when my heart broke
because suddenly it’s breaking all over again

there’s a reason […]

To all you people here who think you want to take your life…

Have you thought about us – the ones that are left behind? Maby you think you have a good reason to end your life – well you dont. Im not saying that noone has a really shitty life, but most of you are just fine.

It makes me really angry, couse I keep thinking about my brothers suicide…. again and again and again and again… I cant believe that he actually end someones life – so f… cruel and violent!!! It doesnt matter whos life it is .

I read in some posts, that you […]

Everyone says,  “it will get better” “hold your head up” “its gonna be okay in the end” Eventually it starts to feel better and you can’t remember you’re lows because you are so high on that mountain top. Then you are flushed with memories and pain, it hurts more physically and you fall backwards and hit the ground hard than before. From the outside everyone thinks its easy to get yourself together, but its much harder.

If so do they work?

Every night I lie down in bed and resolve that tonight I am not gonna sleep until i sort it all and find a way out. but within 15 minutes i fall asleep, and wake up next morning only to find that nothing is sorted and i will have to live another day in confusion and restlessness. I don’t know why I can’t accept the fact that there is no answer and all these are just excuses.

P.S. – I know there are people here who can’t get easy sleep. but as it is said – one doesn’t know the value of thing until its gone. […]

…if so just comment

ok i will leave.i can’t believe it. i was just trying to fit in but everybody is living because of me.you don’t have
To please i have lot’s of others forums to go.enjoy it suckers:(

i wish them the best for our kenyan brothers it is to bad they witness this tragedy.RIP

@persephone

Who has per’s email?