This is first time I have ever posted on web about suicide, this is actually pretty cool. I will not go into all my problems, just to the point where as so many other times in my life, I question why am I living? I have lost really great jobs, decent marraige, etc. and now I feel alone. I also like many others here have seen countless therapists, doctors, been diagnosed with two different things by several doctors, bottom line – I am miserable, I hate where my life is, unfortunately I do not have the balls to commit suicide. I prayed even today several […]
I think its possible the monster energy drink is what’s causing my erratic behavior.Â
On a side note, I still can’t chew even a fucking donut. Really hurts when I do. Or a slice of pizza.Â
(805) 861-5295
Thats in case you wanna text me if youre in the vicinity of me.Â
So I just met schizojinx. Awesome girl. Um ifonlyallofyoknew: I am sorry i was being an asshole yesterday. I was angry and took my anger out on you i dont normally do that and all i can blame it on is the monster i drank. Howtosurvive: text me, sorry I fell asleep. Anyone wanna chat? My […]
i’m dying
I just posted a book in a reply to a post I read on here. This site isn’t what I was looking for however I am grateful to have found it. This topic of conversation isn’t exactly what you feel comfortable or welcome to discuss openly with anyone. I don’t advocate suicide for anyone, it’s horrible in fact and when I think about the impact it has on the people who care about you it does feel selfish. I can only speak about my own situation. Today is a very dark, lonely day and I have never felt more isolated or alone in my life. […]
well…finally got this thing running…im schizojinxx, but please, call me lexi. im schizophrenic, emo, bipolar, depressed and psychotic at times. i have very few, but VERY nice friends. i enjoy drawing, but i SUCK at drawing people…i cut, often. but i am going to try burning. i atempt suicide often…VERY often but im scared of how my friends would get on. fu(k my family, they dont care. i curse alot so yeah..thats me for ya…i hope to find someone like me on here…
If u have a incurable disease that can be past though your genes it would be cruel to have children and pass it on. Yet my mum has had depression all her life and still had me and passed it on to me. Then I did the same like her and 2 of my 3 children have depression. I have great regret bringing them in the world and inflicting pain on them. It is selfish to have children to satisfy your own selfish needs. I wanted to be a mother and I didn’t once think about them. If I could turn back time I wouldn’t […]
My father’s existance summarizes how my life has been for me in a metaphorical term. Emotional blackmail.
My father calls me 24 times a day sometimes more for very trivial things. I do them. If i don’t I know what will happen.
Trash, yard, clean, glass of water, make my food, find my shoes, shave my beard, find my clothes, mow the lawn, water the grass, find my glasses, where’s my tooth brush, let’s get groceries. You go in the store I’ll stay outside (he talks on the phone to some woman i don’t know) Oh i didn’t give you enough money? How much is the […]
anyone live in Idaho?
There’s so much misery here, but it’s so nice outside. Things aren’t as they say in the paper and on the news. There are no bombs or psycho killers; just people trying to get by.
Why don’t I have anything to say… uhhhhh, I’m so confused right now. I’m hungry, have some broccoli and half a cucumber in the fridge, eggos in the freezer, apple on my table, but I don’t want any of it. I don’t want to move. Some stupid part of me thinks that if I sit here looking stupefied and feeling like a bag of crap for long enough, I’ll simply cease […]
Amy, its been 3 years since your passing and I want to leave you a message but never knew where without being ridiculed and questioned whether or not I’m not ok. I was thinking of the day we me so young and carefree I was hopeless and depressed when you met me. That changed so quickly I suddenly had purpose for everything I had a reason to like myself and to like the world around me. I still have your glasses from freshman year safely perched next to the last picture of us, the last time I didn’t fake my smile, the last time […]
Who am I kidding?? I’ll never be OK
I am the Slave of Depression. This must be the main thing that made me this way
Anyway I’ve  always had a dose of craziness in me…Why can’t I be happy?Everyone around me knows how sad and unhappy I am but they don’t give a damn.They even make things worse
I need a miracle! I don’t wanna be like this anymore
wells, today, actually every thursday in the summer means a break from my sisters’ demands, since she will be at a friends, but instead i decide to speed on my bike and flip right over it, now my legs is torn and it hurts just to stand this isnt much of a problem except i was supposed to hang with friends (rare, very rare) the one day i get out im forced to sit on the couch all day…grrrr this is fucked.
…about life, the universe and everything, send me a mail at
anon46 [.at.] lavabit [.dot.] com
I’ve got various instant messaging accounts, but I prefer plain old e-mail or google talk.
If you happen to live nearby (although that is highly unlikely), I’d even go out with you for a coffee…
I’m so sick. Everyone wants me dead. Why do I keep trying to find someone to hold on to? Noone will ever care about me. I can’t keep the happy face anymore, it’s just too much. Everytime that I show someone the agony inside they’re like “Run for the hills”. I will always be alone. Noone could ever love a stupid loser like me. I thought that I could help if I would talk to people around here. But how could a fuck up like me ever help anyone when I can’t even help myself? Everyone is going to be better without me. Nobody will […]
Hello people of SuicideProject.
I’ve been a long time lurker, and this is my first post.
I know there are many kinds of people here.
Young, old, intelligent, poor, mentally ill…
You all have your reasons why you want to leave this world.
But one of the reasons I keep hearing the most is something like:
“I am a complete loser/fuckup and I am unlovable person”.
I have to tell you – that’s probably not true.
And do you know why?
Have you ever thought how many people there are who are much more stupid, much more ugly, and much more fucked up than you are?
Have they ever […]
I haven’t posted anything in a while, while I have been reading others posts and commenting I really have nothing to say as far as myself. I posted that I was entering a manic state, but now I’m not so sure. I have bipolar 2 so I don’t experience intense mania. I have sperts on and off of whats called hypomania. Less intense but still manic and comes with a harsh crash back to reality soon after. So for the last 6 days or so I have been calm, cool, and collected.
I woke up and realized I was completely over my ex and my depression […]
Does anyone else feel happy for a couple of days then just sit down, look at a wall and think “I’m not ok anymore..” then just get really tired?
I Feel Lost, Confussed, BreathLess, & Its It’s Getting Harder To Right Down How I Feel Because I Can Never Find The Exact Words To Explain Any Of My Feelings, I Have Such A Great Life And A Loving Family But Yet This Feeling Always Seems To Creep Up On Me,..Honesly I Dont Know Where Or How Ima Go On With This…..
As a child, I used to idealize the world and humans .. I knew there were people with bad intentions, but my then-gullible-self believed the majority of us were working to make this world a place where one can feel alive most of the time (a better place) .. I used to see light and darkness wouldn’t have me shaken for too long .. I had genuine hope for the future (not that forced hope you’re expected to create)
From adolescence to when I dropped out, illusions had evaporated one after the other .. truth is people are overly concerned with improving their own situation, humans […]
My parents dont give a shit about me, or how I feel about anything. Only that I get good grades. If i get any less than a A they scream and shout at me and take away the only things I enjoy-My xbox, and laptop. I only enjoy these, because when I play games I can escape to another world. I have tried to kill myself three times already… One time one of my parents saw me trying and didnt even bat an eyelid. They couldnt have cared less. The only people I care about in the world are my friends.. And even they are […]