Thursday morning… This existence is painful, I cant take it anymore. I have no friends all of them have betrayed me, or fucked me over. My family offers no support with anything that I’ve ever done. Every girl I’ve ever met has used me, cheated on me, then got their new boyfriends to bash me. I was abused as a child by step father, and abandoned my real father. Every choice I’ve ever made has been wrong in someones eyes. My best friend overdosed on ice, and has been in a psych ward for the past 3 years, he doesn’t even know who I am. […]
I am the girl who is always seen when doing nothing.I am the girl who all the rumours are about.
I am the girl who never smiles, laughs but always friendly.
I am the girl who will help the world but can’t help herself.
I am the girl who can see the beauty in every one but herself.
Who I am should not be the question but who I want to be.
The answer is happy with me and able to help me.
Not to be self-centered do not get me wrong, just able to self-love.
I miss the people who know me. Now I know how it feels to finally see the people I badly wanted to be with because they knew me and then realize that I left behind the ones who really know me for these people who will never understand me or even care to try to learn who I am. It hurts. I thought this is what I wanted but these aren’t the people I grew up with…
I’m home… Fuck it I have no home. I thought I wanted this but I’m still fucking miserable. Guess I’ll never be really happy again. I feel more trapped […]
They are terrible. My grandma is fucking crazy and she screams at me and chases me around. I live with my grandparents. My grandpa has no heart for the emotion of another human being. They used to beat their kids. My mom hit me really hard yesterday because of something stupid. I’m gifted but they tell me I’m not. They don’t encourage me or any of my talents or anything I do. They constantly blame me for things and make me feel like shit. I have no confidence. I don’t go out. I don’t do anything. I research and self-educate myself a lot but they […]
This is gonna be the strangest of post for me so far…I’d just like to share this completely for once.This is the one thing I haven’t told anybody since the time it was created when I was 10.No one ever knew this,not even my family.Strange that I’m putting it here to complete strangers on a suicide forum.
I think this is in a way how my last sliver of hope takes form.For as far as I can remember,this world was boring,colorless and full of unfair things.I was quick to escape in my own little dream-land.I was a lone little dreamer since kindergarden,always drawing by myself.No one […]
I can’t actually remember how it started. I’m not sure if I can even call it depression. Most of my life I have been surrounded by control. I have been from place to place. My parents had me at 14 so things were crazy growing. I barely ever saw them. Now I live with my father because I have a mother who is going through problems I don’t like to talk about.
I let myself be controlled, and even if i want to, I cant stand up for myself. I’m 17, and in school I just some weird lesbian (I’m not lesbian but people […]
^^^
Trying hard to keep going but dont think I can last any longer. I dont know what else to do Im so useless and selfish for wanting to kill myself. Honestly If it was easier thing to do like if I had a suicide button id deffinatlry be gone right now
I’ve decided to let it all go, let everything that’s bothering me, go. I feel like I should be someone because of the people I know and the expectations that I perceive they have of me, but it’s all in my head. Ok, I’m sure it’s not all in my head or else I wouldn’t be writing this.
I love women, but I have nothing to offer. All I want is death and that supercedes just about everything I see and hear. Any desires, yearnings I might have, are outranked by my desire to not be.
I haven’t seen friends in months, recently started chatting […]
Anyone wanna talk? about anything and everything? forget about the bad things in life and just get to know someone new.
benn.bywater@hotmail.co.uk
email me or add me on msn.
I’m really really starting to loose all enthusiasm in my life. I have no social life anymore, work takes up all my time and I hate it, I feel so miserable there but getting another job is difficult because I have no transport. I have too much spare time and nothing to do with it, I have lost so many of my friends and the ones I have left don’t seem to really wanna hang out with me. I’m just getting frustrated beyond belief, not just life, but myself.
I just need some friends. Some people to hang out with. People to laugh and joke […]
ugh! i knew faking it would come back and bite me someday that day would be yesterday and now all summer. one day 20 minutes and a guy fell for me??? but not ME my fake me! now he wants to get to know “me” all summer? great. should i fool him and keep my fake personality going? or should i open up and tell him EVERYTHING? suicidal, depression, cutting, everything, he already knows the worst part..that im a whore! haha perfect. what am i supposed to do..?
I still have urges of death…..just wanting to end my miserable existence. But I continue on.
I caught chlamydia for the 3rd time….awesome right.
I am in a relationship with a guy who, well don’t give a fuck. Lies so much it’s just not even worth caring about anymore.
My mother still thinks I’m worthless. I’m still jobless. BUT I did leave home and have been staying with my older cousin in a one bedroom apt with about 10 other people.
I’m living the life.
i will never understand someone who can say someone else is judgmental and that person themselves are. My sister judges me a lot. She calls me a jerk, mean, emotionless everything, and i dont understand why. She doesn’t know what i went through everyday at school. Do i think im a jerk and all that? No! And if i am then i don’t mean to be. Everyone has their off days. it just pisses me the freak off when she says that stuff about me. I feel like she doesnt even know anything about me or my life, or the things i go through, and she has the nerve to sit […]
That awkward moment when that person you forgave betrays you in EXACTLY the same way again.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
It’s actually funny because of how screwed over I am.
But don’t worry, retaliation is coming, *****. I let the last time slide because I must be a fucking saint, but this will not go unpunished.
MWAHAHAHAHAHA. You’ve yet to reckon with me, sweetheart.
Will someone please talk to me? I feel like doing it again and i just want someone to talk to.. Please? Anyone? I feel like im alone even thougj im right next to people.. I just want someone who will be considerate and not judge, even though the people next to me wont.. I just dont want to scare them ): i could just use some friends… ):
Well as the title States I’m new to this site. My names tj and I am cursed and bated by everyone and everything. If there is a God which I don’t believe there is I’m pretty sure he hares me as well. I lost my best friend, my girlfriend and pretty much everyone who’s ever been in my heart either by choice or not. No matter how hard I try to be a good person and nice to everyone it always goes horribly wrong. Most recently I found a girl who I began to fall in love with ironically with the same name as my […]
So, I get annoyed when people complain about how much their life sucks, but hey this what this website is for right?
Okay so i’ve been struggling with depression for a long time , around 5 years or so. I’m 19 now but even when I was 13 and 15 i would get in these slumps, especially when I was 15 since my entire school hated me and I just kept fucking up with my family and things.
I always felt like i was missing something.. Me and my family didn’t always get along but we do now. No one I know has ever known […]
Dez, it is time for education…
Heat Sensors, Cameras, etc, etc etc.. who is in charge of it
all? some retarded american female and male. useless bastards
that have sex all day long and poop. nothing divine nothing special.
Do not talk to me about heat sensors or any of that stuff.
i am the master of codes and hardware is simply not above
codes.
codes are below everything but it guides everything dez.
it is the quantum reality, at quantum reality, we spend pennies
to run tests dez, and tests suggest , this game is mine to win
yours to lose if you do not hire me into […]
It’s been 37 years next week. Â 37 years old, and never had anyone say they loved me. Â My wife was the only relationship I had, and I got into it because I was fedup of not being in a relationship and she seemed to like somethings about me.
14 years later, I realise what I have is not love. Â I want a separation and I have told her, yet my friends who I have always been there for are telling me I should “stick it out”, or that I am being obstinate. Â Today I wanted to talk to someone, anyone, tell them how I feel, […]