sick and tired of being sick and tired

I’ve always wanted to die, ever since I was a child, I have no idea why. When I was a child and I believed in god, I prayed not to wake up the next day. And yet, I had a normal childhood. It seems that I have a tendency towards depression. Well, the years have passed and I imagined killing myself in so many ways that I can’t even remember them all. Now I’m all alone but I’m fine with loneliness, in fact, I think I want to be alone. I’m sick and tired of this crazy world and all the people, I want a sane world. I wish some aliens would come and take me to their planet. Too bad they aren’t visiting us.

I have not had a job for a while now and I really dislike being a burden to my parents. Well, I don’t ask for anything, I don’t want anything, I’m sick of it all, I’m tired of money, I’m tired of job interviews, I feel so useless, I went through the university for nothing it seems, for a piece of paper. I’m tired of stupidity, this world could be a paradise, if only people were reasonable. I just wish I’d go somewhere far away from everyone and everything.

I do have a nice strong rope and a nice strong beam to tie it to, it would be so easy, it would all be over in a few minutes. Nothing would really change, star dust I’ve been, am and will be. Billions of people have died and will die, I’m just a grain of sand on the beach.