Don’t read this if you hate things that waste your time.
Sorry for wasting space as well

Everything’s my fault. I blame me for everything that goes wrong. Maybe I can fix it by ending everything. I just don’t want to fail again. I’m tired of my failures.

Blank stares within the rain, if only you endured my pain. You shall know how much i love you. Despite my feelings of blue.

“Get over it” they say, staring right through me

“Talk it out” she says, holding my hand

He pulls back “to set me free”

So I’m drifting like cold sand

Sitting in my room, staring out the window

Razor in my hand, blinking through the tears

Waiting for the world to slow

Stumbling through my fears

And the whispers…wrap me up

And my stories…screaming to be heard

But now I know my time is up

And I’m streaming out the words

Please make room for us inside your heart

They think they know me well, but that’s not the truth

They don’t know, it’s ripping me apart

So I hold myself aloof

Holding back the screams tearing up my soul

Keeping up […]

as i was walking to my mailbox i found myself marching to my own beat. nothing but warm cracked gravel beneath my feet. i found myself smiling as the breeze brought movement to my lifeless hair. im still waking with no emotion on my face but a blank stare. the soil beneath the earth in which i was given birth. i long for a taste of the blistering sun wondering how hot the burn would be when im all done. i can feel it in my chest. the urge to keep walking and talking to myself. you know its out there but it hides in […]

I drag you along like a lost weight from my jail cell. Your evil and as cold as stone. I drag you around to all my classes, to every meal I eat, every breath I take, and when I think I can get a good nights sleep, and a rest from you; you show up. You twist my dream into a nightmare of you. When I finally give up and admit there is nothing else you can possibly do to hurt me, I wake up and see you standing above me; looking at me with your twisted smile.
I find myself looking in a mirror.

Yes mom.

It is all my fault.

Everything is absolutely all my fault.

Nothing,

But my fault

But you wanna know the sad part?

I’m actually starting to fucking beleive that it is all my fault.

It’s all your fault mom.
The reason why I cut.
The reason why I cry.
The reason why I scream into my pillow everynight.
It’s all your fault mom.
You push me to the edge — you push me over.
Just when it gets good.
Just when I think everything is going to be different.
You yell! You hit! You hurt — me.
So yes,
I’m selfish. I’m dumb. I’m failure. — You won!
I’m Done!

The prison of mirrors… we can’t see,
Yet trapped we are… by its reflection,
It sees all fear and watches our downfall,
It will rip all lies and pride from the soul.

You are all… all that you hate,
Force fed memories, suffer humiliation,
Victim of darkness, of the inner hidden kind,
I am the eye within the gleam,
Shatter before a mirror that stares into (a shallow soul).

Poison yourself… revel in waste,
Poison yourself, in the name of evil… destroy yourself.

I will always be the reason to hate your self,
Mirrors… will oppress your mind,
And follow all… all that you hide,
Blind, step inside […]

Do you ever feel like you are completely worthless? I do.

Do you ever think how much easier the world would be if you weren’t in it? I do.

Ever day i cut myself. It feels amazing. Like all the stress in my life is just released.

I live with a shadow- heavy on my shoulders. I’m dragging every fucked up memory around. I keep looking for that moment that it will be taken away.

After every pointless day i feel death is the only answer.

I may be crazy but im done fighting. I want to just give up. I want to be realeased from all my pain.

I’m done.

im reallly fucking happy today. i chopped all my hair off. its like a new me. i keep smiling and dancing duidfeui im at a loss for words i just wann sing and dance and run barefoot through my yard

does anyone have any specific films or tv shows or music they watch that go with their feelings, or like how they would like things to be, like at the moment i’m watching frequency, which i like cause it makes me feel, maybe, just maybe, i could change the shit thats happened, and make things better.

She’s too beautiful for words.

She doesn’t believe the compliments.

She deserves better than some guy with a lip ring that treats her badly.

Breathe in.

Breathe out.

You have the right to.. And you were put on this planet for a reason.

Please stay ok babe. :’)

Dedicated to Broken.

I’d like to believe that things are getting better but they aren’t. I’d like to believe that things will change but they simply won’t. I keep dreaming that I have friends and that people will actually want me for once. Instead I have people who pretend to like me because they don’t have a fricken back bone to admit they don’t like me. Or they just ignore me, like that’s any better.

I’m so fucking tired of pleasing people.

Put on a smile no one cares how you really feel. If you’re not happy you don’t belong. You know that quiet fat girl over there sitting by herself? She’s […]

what if tomorrow I woke up and I was loved … what if tomorrow I woke up and all this was just a terrible terrible nightmare …. what if my childhood was filled with toys and happiness, instead of bruises and fear …. what if I chose a husband who loved me, instead of one who fit my version of what life is … what if I had parents who weren’t addicts and who blame me for not taking care of them properly and who still still still are like a cancer in my life … What if ….  Man, I would sleep for a […]

i’m always planning for the worst

i signed my will right after birth

i got my eulogy rehersed

Why cant i not be left alone? Why is my name being call out every five seconds? There is other people in the fucking house you know. I cant even sleep anymore without my name being call. Ugh im going to go insane. It makes me sad and mad to even have this name. Makes me less of a person and more of a slave.:/ I cant wait to kill myself so everything is left alone without me. At least i get to sleep for once. At least i could be left alone out of this world. v- v

My teacher said this today: “If you’re having a down day you can’t just wish to be seven again, you can’t wish it all away. You have to learn to adapt”

It made me think “*****.”

I’ve never had strong feelings for someone like I did with this one person; however, we never met. Apparently this means nothing to some people. Anyway; today I learned that he’d been more suicidal than I originally expected (with a history of attempts). I’m frustrated because my love couldn’t reach him -which only proves to me that love is bullshit; it cannot exceed the limits of distance, and it cannot heal broken hearts. I usually don’t bother myself with this kind of issue as it usually is just a matter of brain chemistry… but it’s making me feel uncomfortable.

I want to see the blood

I want to feel the pain

I’m trekking through the mud

I’ve slowly gone insane

And now I just don’t care

It’s crowding in my brain

I’m ripping out my hair

I’m drowning in the pain

My heart has turned to ice

My body is all numb

You think that I’m so nice

But honey you’re just dumb

I feel I’m in a cube

Boxed in from every side

You say it’s a bad mood

So I’ll just go and hide

I peek out from my hole

The darkness keeps me in

The thoughts, they take their toll

There’s no way that I can win

The days are dragging by

The end is creeping near

I’ll leave it with a sigh…

One […]

Anna my friend i certanitly hope you are ok. Please do not go through what you said you were gonna do PLEASE i beg of you. Im worried about you,       

I cant help ur lonliness but im always availiable. if u dnt want to talk just give me a sign ur ok. Please. Im not sleepn til i get some sign your ok.

Brandon(Nihilism00)