There isn’t any place as welcoming and unforgiving as it. Actually, that’s wrong. Hitting rock bottom means everything you have done may not be tolerable, but maybe it might be forgivable in the next life. And so here we sit. Alone. Cold. Empty. Loving and hating every second of it. Loving, because the hatred gives you power. Something to feel. I’d rather feel bitter than this damned sadness all the time. Ignorant to other emotions. Numb. The soft buzzing in your ears allows you to focus on your own problems. That’s all everyone is doing, anyways. Dealing with their own problems. What’s it to you […]
Tag:
18 Years
Hi, my name is Naana, 18 years old
Caution, I may go in different directions at times, most likely due to the fact that I have no idea how to put into format my thoughts correctly. This is my first time ever telling anyone properly, also my first time on here.
I’m stuck between two, whether to live or to choose my death. It all scares me and I question why me? I won’t say I’m not doing this for attention, because deep down I want to know at least someone knew I existed and cared; Knowingly I know I existed for my family, but I can’t […]
I just want to die. I have plenty of friends, great job, beautiful house. But I’m just tired. Tired of pretending my life is great. My husband is a selfish ass. And of course the only thing that matters is how he sees me. Even though I know he is a selfish ass. I want him to give me some credit. Not put me down for every thing I do, think or say. Of course I’ve tried to talk to him about this ( only for 18 years). but women are the ever ” I can fix it” – with enough love understanding and communication […]
HELLO, my name is teela i am 18 years old and currently i am a suicide survivor…….ive attempted suicied numerous times..well im on here because in my defense i didnt have anybody to talk to like call or shoot a tex to and say hey this is whats happening……i may not be able to give u every reason to not kill your self but i sure can give u every reason to make you wanna live im from a small town and im about to finish up high school…every since ive been in school nothing but bullying has tooken my place…ive been raped…beaten and everything […]
i have been divorced for 2 years and just cant stop loving him, even tho he is remarried, this man was my soul mate or so i thought we were married 18 years and ive tried everything therapy meds nothing is working and it just gets worse i cant live in this pain any longer. Â the pain is great i cry i lay in bed and just think, ive lost my job ive been told im crazy i want to die just to scared to do it because i will probably fuck that up to.
So, I’ve gone through a lot lately, I was enrolled to college out of high school, as are most people these days.
I was promised a job, a house, a roof over my head, and all the things that go a long with moving from one parent to another.
As soon as I made the journey from my Grandparents to my fathers, I knew something wasn’t right though.
The job my father had promised me, it never existed.
Even after not dropping a dime to child support for the last 18 years of my life, he still complained when there was another person under his roof.
The second I couldn’t […]
hi i have just joined 2 days ago and i feel better already. so the real problem is i can’t learn to love others because i don’t love myself. i don’t even know how to receive love. I’m 18 never had a girlfriend and only have kissed a girl once. i lost the chance to tell the love of my life that i like her a lot in high school. I’m in college now. 18 years of not loving myself has gone to shits for my personality. people see me as a immature fuck. so my final question is how do i kill myself without […]
Five years ago I lost the best job I ever had.  I worked there for 18 years and just like that I was out. I can’t let go of the past. I think about that job everyday. Random events remind me of that job and it makes me cry. I don’t know what to do with myself. I really need help but I don’t know how to get it. I see a psychiatrist once a week but he’s nothing more than a pill pusher. What I need is someone to talk to – really talk to. Someone who can help me put my life in […]
I hit a new low last night. There is one person who, without fail, makes me happy – even if said happiness is fleeting. However, last night, I was so close to cancelling our catch-up because I just didn’t feel like catching up.
We did catch up, and I’m glad we did … in a way.
What it has gone and done is confirmed that I’ve pretty much invested 18 years of my life in the wrong person. Not helpful.
I also feel under siege at work. My depression has got to a point where it has noticeably affected my work, and my boss’s boss had to have […]
so because im new to this i will just state my problem and what i hope to be the solution i am 18 years old my name is kyle i have worked my entire life to be a good person the best person actually but i am a loser i am overweight i am unhappy i have a girl i love her name is miranda everything i have is breaking she doesnt understand how much i love her or how much i care about her i have never hurt her lied or cheated on her we have been dating for 6 months she loves me […]
That’s what everyone keeps telling me. Don’t worry **** it will get better it always does. For me i have never had an incident were something gets better. I am 18 years old this is my first post. I have never actually been happy. Until about almost a year ago i met this girl. She is the one. She understood me, she was my kinda girl. She loved me and i still love her. Over the summer i had to move to Alaska. I am still here posting this at 4:45 in the morning cause i have sleeping problems recently. I feel like this girls is […]
Where do i even begin? I am 18 years old and i lost the people who pretty much raised me at a young age and developed depression before i had hit the third grade. Then i found out i had cancer, ive been fighting that for almost a year now and ive gone through so many surgeries and dont know what to say about it. But the weight of the sickness and the looming thought of dying and just having peace finally is so enticing i long for it. But then seven months ago i met the most amazing person i k.ow the person thats […]
All I ever wanted was to be excepted, I made friends with some of the cooler kids, got a girlfriend, got a car, but it’s all gone now. People change, my girlfriend cheated on me, and I wrecked my car (douche bag shouldn’t have turned out in front of me…). I decided to follow in my fathers footsteps and become a welder to make him proud, maybe he’d except me, but he never did… He thinks that I’m just some dumb kid who breaks the law, just like every adult thinks. I used to hangout with my girl, or my boys on a Friday night, […]
For anyone who is feeling suicidal, would you please answer the following questions?
Please tell me if:
1. You have never taken medication for depression
2. You are taking medication but it is not helping you
I would also be interested to know:
A. If you have taken medication, what has been your experience with it? Are you still
waiting for it to work? Have you tried many kinds but nothing has helped you yet?
B. If you have never taken medication for depression, what is your reason? Under
what conditions would you agree to get on medication?
I am someone who did not believe medication would help me when I was […]
I guess I’m not quite sure what to do at this point, so I need ur input. I’m 18 years old and ever since 5th grade I’ve wanted to die…or at least I didn’t care to live. In the past few years I’ve been but into a hospital four times due to breakdowns, see I’m stuck in this cycle between life and death and I don’t think itll ever end till th day I die. I’m terrified of existing, and I have several mental Heath problems that have caused me to lose all my friends…I push them away without realizing it, but it’s only […]
Sorry for my bad English, I’m Dutch/French (I’m a 18 years old, school dropout). I hope this all makes somewhat sense…
I was seen as a child prodigy when I was child (learned myself read at a young age and I went directly to second year of primary school), but everything went bad in secundary school. I feel totally useless. I have nothing to live for. The expectations that society has, the expectations I have of myself. The reality that doesn’t fit the expectations. My apathy towards humans, towards my family. I have no friends, I never needed friends, neither have I desired to have friends. I […]
I learned this recently. The story is very confusing. Are you ready?
This is who I thought I was: a severely schizophrenic German boy, who was severely abused as a child, alongside his twin sister. He has a boyfriend, who also has a twin. He is in Foster care.
Who I really am: a Canadian girl, less severely abused, with no twin, no boyfriend, and no Foster care.
What happened: I have multiple personalities. I suppose I’m transgender, because all the personalities are male. I am also schizophrenic, though not as badly as previously thought. The original personality, the female birthed 18 years ago next week, is gone. […]
i’m currently 18 years old (male), have a good circle of friends, supportive family, and have never really had any common struggles such as abuse or neglect. The thing is, i’m totally fucked inside. I’m a shell. I’ve always been told i’m attractive and i believe them partly. The thing is, i have a huge and weird shaped head. picture an upside down triangle. I used to have shorter hair when i was younger and i thought nothing of it. i used to get the odd comment like ‘you have a big head’ but it never used to bother me. i then realised that a […]
How should I start off? Well here it goes, hi I am a international student (18 years old) and I am to graduate this year in May. The thing is I have never had friends since I was in the 7th grade, which was when my so called friends decided that it was cool to bully and ignore me. The one moment that still lasts in my head was the field trip… and it still plays in my head like a recurring nightmare… going on the train with my ex-friends and getting bullied throughout the field trip. Not only that but sleeping a spare tent […]
[I WARN YOU NOW THIS IS LONG]
I’ll explain the tite in a minute. I’ve researched about suicide, understood all the facts. Yet I’m a hypocryte. I apoligise for that but here’s how I am: I’ll use as much logic and try to keep polite to get my point across if I’m trying to make or keep someone reletivy happy. But when it comes to myself. I can’t help but be as pesstimistic as possible.
Now about the title- One thing I heard that helps is getting your problems out. But I don’t trust some people and others I don’t want to worry. So I post it […]