Irony right? I’m in this one. I’ve been here for the past 4 years, but naturally people won’t even notice me (different account i’m using now so you can’t find me). It’s like that even with real life support groups or other online ones I’ve been to. People just don’t care. I’ve been in one for 1 1/2 years and the other for 3 years. And whilst I’ve made many friends, they’ve stopped caring about me. They don’t even notice me anymore. When we’re alone, they either make an excuse and leave or just sit there awkwardly with headphones and work/read. I try to talk with them, […]
always
The end of my life is growing closer. I’ve always known I would take my own life one day. But that day always seemed far off. So it wasn’t a source of excessive worry. However, that is no longer the case. I have reached a state very near the point of emotional exhaustion. My life has been spiraling downward for over a decade. I’ve lost everything in my life. My little remaining money allowed me to keep things going and appearances up. And I’ve kept assuming/hoping my career would be revitalized. After being unemployed for 3 years now, my last vestiges of hope are gone. […]
Hello Internet,
About me: I am a 12 year old guy that is not very happy but I am sad.
The Internet is my favorite place let me explain why, I have a bad life and school is the main problem, the teachers laugh at me kids bully me call me names etc… There is only some Pepole that are nice to me. Pepole even some of my friends make fun of me, I try to be playful but they say stop always very loud. I have been thinking of suicied but, I am very sacred of doing it. And the Internet is fun because pepole treat […]
i cant sleep. The anxiety and fear of going to school the next day to get bullied keeps me awake. When i do sleep its filled with nightmares of past experiences. and the voices. they’re always there i need help but doctors dont know what to do with me. At this point i feel like giving up.
What do you do when you’re divided into two again? When the part that wants to wait and fight is barely heard, and the other part wakes? When you can’t understand the words coming from your mouth… when everything is a blur of colours, noise, confusion and pain, and you stop believing you have the ability to make it end. Do you keep fighting for a forgotten world? Should you be afraid that you’re glimpsing into a past world where control belonged to something else in your mind? Do you listen? It’s like something sharing your mind, some dark, twisted thing, is alive again. It’s […]
The sensation that deprive your mind of any kind of goal oriented thinking and at the same time produce a will for getting rid of itself. The way it is felt is immense and it takes over other feelings much like an orgasm. Although momentarily but lasts its mark on your body, soul or your heart. Whenever you get reminded of your pain, of any time, you immediately know what is the feeling and how you would feel if to endure that pain again….But pain unfortunately has a habit of being recurrent. Normally brain would push the pain of the past to the farthest corners […]
I never though that I would honestly feel this way because I thought I would always be happy but I guess not. I always felt upset for some reason. Something would just happen that was happy it turned out to be upsetting when I thought of something different. I mean people would notice anything because they were to selfish and thinking about their stuck up lives and making a reason to make other people feel bad for them which I though was kinda stupid because other people are going through harder times which they don’t understand. I just want to go away that’s the easiest […]
Im sorry. I’m not the son my father wishes I could be, or the daughter my mother deserves. I have been, and always will be the second choice because I AM NOT GOOD ENOUGH. I’m not kind enough, not smart enough for my boyfriend, not strong enough for every one and their hardships, not popular enough, not worth enough. I’m not worthy of you guys- all of you are so courageous and talented and intelligent and thoughtful. I don’t deserve you- and besides, you all have each other. You don’t need me- You all have each other. No one ever has, and I just need […]
I just want to say a bit, fat, hugemongous thank you to all of my very punny peeps who enjoyed the pun post. I truly hope you all enjoyed it- I hope I was able to kindle some joy in your hearts. If any of you have a horrendous day, just dance your way over to the pun post and remember that there is always light at the end of the tunnel. Have a wonderful evening my lovelies 🙂
Lately things haven’t been looking up to me. It’s been brining me down to my lowest point, to the point were I don’t feel like my family or friends care about me anymore and I want to die. Everyone always compares me to someone I’m not and that makes me wish I was someone else. I wrote my suicide note out to my closest friends incase I make the drastic decision. I know who to send the message to and hopefully they will allow me to go in peace. I’m not taking my life anytime soon (I don’t think) but if things don’t look up […]
I’ve cut
I’ve tied the rope
I’ve drunk the poison
But I’m still here
I’m tired of fighting I want out. Not sure if anyone understand but I don’t want no one to notice me. I smile and laugh like everything’s okay.. but when I get back home I hope it’s my last day. Wishing and wishing that my pain will go a way. What is it that you feel. Idk but whatever it is it’s tearing my self esteem, my happiness gradually and I’m yellin but my voice is muted by my mask.
I’ve cut
I’ve tied the rope
I’ve drunk the poison but I’m Still here
What the hell what does this […]
I’ve been through it all.. it started when I started high school to when I lost my first boyfriend. I tried overdosing on Pain Killers nothing happened… nothing ever happens. I try to hang myself.. over 10 times and it always end up to me taking it off my neck and being weak about it. Because in all reality who really wants to die right? We just want the pain to end. But it doesn’t last. But Lately I’ve been letting this whole suicide thing get to me. I’m literally thinking about doing it tomorrow and succeeding. I don’t know what else to do. This […]
My friend has been through a lot two years ago he moved to Louisiana and when he was over there a lot of things happened to him he’s suicidal and depressed he feels so much pain everyday and I hate it he’s mad for things that happened over there where he used to live I really want to help him but he tells me that he can’t forget about everything that happened he’s addicted to cutting but I’m not there when he’s cutting so how can I stop him I want him to be happy and not feel this pain I get so mad because […]
Hey there. I saw your eyes yesterday. You’re disappointed. Sorry. I might be… out. I’m actually out. I’m always off. I’m always out. I push back my chair. I hide my hands in my pockets. I lay my head up against the wall. I deaf myself out and off with music. I don’t wanna listen anymore. I just don’t wanna be here. I keep complaining all the time. Always blaming someone, something. Always wondering, about me, about the others, about everything. I live in a world that isn’t. I have to make up my own to smile. See the smile on my lips when I […]
I’m really confused I’m not even sure why I’m depressed I wake up everyday feeling so sad I feel lonely all the time I feel like no one cares about me or how I feel I get anxiety and I tried killing myself with pills last week I cut and I want to smoke or drink to take the pain away some of my family members say I look thinner I’m always tired and I sleep a lot this week I’m eating more food than usual what is wrong with me can you guys help me out here I’m confused
I know no one one is really listening, but I have no where else to go…………
Well I fucked up again, for the 3 millionth time. I posted something on facebook and I was in my head if you know what I mean. I said something about my family (well my moms side) and it was about money. I said ” november, but being nice enough anymore people are going to treat you like shit no matter what you do especially if you dont have a job even your brothes treat you like shit no matter what you do when it comes to people liking you […]
I’m tired. Tired of everything. Well not everything. I’m not tired of the times when I feel some sort of happiness, I’m not tired of the times when I’m alone and no one bothers me, but I’m tired of the rest of it. Tired of people relying on me to help them with things that I cant even help myself with. That was always the case with my former best friend. She seemed as though she was in the same situation as me, although I never really saw her looking sad or wanting to die. We are no longer friends but at the time she […]
I have known my husband for 5 years, married for 3.
I have come to the conclusion that one does not know loneliness until married to someone who ignores you.
Intimacy and sex are very important to me. I love cuddling, massaging, touching, and making love to my husband. My husband does not reciprocate very much. And now he also doesn’t have sex very much. My husband has depression. In the last 6 1/2 months we have had sex 4 times. 4 (that’s four) times in 6 1/2 months (little over half a year). We used to have sex everyday.
My husband also likes to […]
So much has happened since the last time I posted. I haven’t been able to actually log in and write about it, but I thought, “I have to keep on writing and just let it all out, before this pot is ready to explode and suicide becomes the next and only option available.”
I mean suicide is always an option that tries to crawl out of the darkest depths of my mind and there are times that I just let it. I let it consume me and my thoughts because that’s easier than having to deal with reality. But then there are times that I’m just […]
the worst part of this shit is the fact that ill never get to tell my side of the story. Everyone thinks I’m a child molester so I have no side. I want to shout so badly that none of its true but if I do then I’m lying. I’m so tired. I cant cry because its fake I can’t smile because then I’m looking for attentions. I know god is laughing at me. Why am I still alive. I really shouldn’t be alive, I don’t event want to be alive. I have to hold everything in all the time. I lash out at people […]