Tag:

Apparent Reason

Why do people push love away before they can give love a chance?

by sleepxdeath 9/26/2013

written by sleepxdeath

Fear, Frustration,Â AngerÂ and Heart Break changes that.

Have you ever been so excited and so alive with one person yet for no apparent reason they just leave and everything changes? One day you guys are doing so much and are so happy that you can’t leave that person behind, because you think that there isn’t anyone as loving like them or enjoy each other’s company? You’ve done almost everything together and feels like nobody can ever replace them? Then one day, you both wake up. They leave you behind for other people. They lie; make excuses. Then they or another person tells you that they never met […]

9/26/2013 3 comments

Back home after failing

by ISmiled 6/15/2013

written by ISmiled

So here I am after failing the first time. Let’s go back to the night of the 26th of May, for the full story.

I was feeling awful that night, it was another one of my bouts of guilt and depression. But this one was different, while normally, they happen for no apparent reason and last for a few hours, half a day at most, this one lasted for 3 days, after an incident with a boy from my class. We’ll say he wasn’t well-liked, and he was awkward, sweaty and not the best looking either. He came up and asked to be my partner for […]

6/15/2013 5 comments

Does Anybody ?

by myowndestruction 5/7/2013

written by myowndestruction

does anybody know that alone feeling ? that feeling of feeling worthless the feeling of wanting to cry all the time because you are lost you dont know where you belong. you try to smile and laugh try to pretend to be happy but deep down inside you are screaming out screaming to be heard for them to see that all you long for is a hug that will make you feel so safe. crying these tears for no apparent reason, i feel empty i am a walking dead soul i look in the mirror and i dont see who i am . i see […]

5/7/2013 3 comments

Guilt

by flatus 2/17/2013

written by flatus

I’ve read that depression is based on self-loathing.

I’ve never experienced sober happiness the way others seem to. Â Looking back on my life, the parts that I think of as happiness are brief moments of relief from this always-present guilt that seems to hover over my head. Â When it briefly lifts once in awhile, that’s happiness to me. Â It makes me feel lonely too, and I wonder if others ever suffer from the same thing.

I wondered if I’ve been hating myself. Â It’s true that I don’t like myself, but “hate?” Â That seemed a little too harsh. […]

2/17/2013 3 comments

Survivor – 15 years later

by BvG 11/9/2012

written by BvG

I sent a bullet through my skull 15 years ago on November 10th, 1997.Â I never did it again, came close a couple of times but I’ve tried hard never to let things get that bad again.Â Of course, so many things are out of our control and there’s always the day to day BS that canÂ lead toÂ death by a thousand cuts.Â Even as a small child I remember suicide being an option.Â If things went bad at school or with friends I remember thinking “I could always kill myself” and it made me feel better.Â I didn’t act on it until much later but […]

11/9/2012 1 comment

Bipolar

by Bipolar8609 10/12/2012

written by Bipolar8609

The day embarked with a feeling of happiness. One of those days where you just wake up and you know *i’m happy*. It’s continuous but seems to last for seconds when it lasts about a day. You’re the quintessence of happiness. When your busy day of running around and trying to stay away from your house ends, you must go “home”. Their your parents scream and yell, no silence but in your own thoughts. However your thoughts tend to be pessimistic, annoyingly so. Because you grew up without a sense self-worthiness. But life goes on and you walk to school everyday, plodding around, for […]

10/12/2012 0 comment

Happiness isn’t a choice

by RJo 7/14/2012

written by RJo

I hate to say it but I’ve heard it from so many sources. Just be happy! Maybe there’s something horribly wrong with me but I can’t push myself to be happy. I should be though-from the outside my life kind of seems pretty fucking OK. Nowadays I feel guilty and anxious because I can’t bring myself to enjoy it. It’s there, right in front of me but forcing myself to be happy?

That only deepens my anxiety making it so much worse. I tried to ask for help, to make people understand me but they can’t. Now the plan switched to: I’ll off myself if I […]

7/14/2012 17 comments

My deamons wont leave me

by james page 2/17/2012

written by james page

Last night my dad went crazy at my mum for no apparent reason.Â Â Its been going on for 15 years and its been haunting me all my life . My dad has anger problems (and also smokes weed) and because of this i am afraid of other people who do to so im afraid to talk to people.Â Â Because of the argument my parents had last night i wanted to run away so my dad could realise that im not happy with the way hes acting but i couldnt run away cause i was too much as a pussey.Â Â Im a very quiet person so […]

2/17/2012 3 comments

Almost Gone..

by tahnee_wisch27 2/10/2012

written by tahnee_wisch27

I never understood why I would one minute be unbelievably happy and the next minute be crying for no apparent reason..
It all started on a Monday after school, which is another reason life had been unbearable. No matter where I went I was the school whore..or at least the freshman whore. But back to that Monday night, my cousin whoâ€™s also my best friend was over spending the night. We were picking out clothes to wear for the next day at school. Then my mom came home, she was obviously stressed and started yelling at me. Next thing I know weâ€™re screaming bloody murder […]

2/10/2012 1 comment

Almost Gone…

by tahnee_wisch27 2/9/2012

written by tahnee_wisch27

I never understood why I would one minute be unbelievably happy and the next minute be crying for no apparent reason..
It all started on a Monday after school, which is another reason life had been unbearable. No matter where I went I was the school whore..or at least the freshman whore. But back to that Monday night, my cousin who’s also my best friend was over spending the night. We were picking out clothes to wear for the next day at school. Then my mom came home, she was obviously stressed and started yelling at me. Next thing I know we’re screaming bloody murder […]

2/9/2012 3 comments