So my depression started when i was bullied severely in middle school and summer camp, people really don’t know how much this messes up a person. I became introverted and started thinking of my own death constantly at a young age , to the people that say it gets better i just have to laugh. Because now that I am older I found out that I am diagnosed with schizophrenia, and not to mention I am a 30 year old unsuccessful virgin that also has erectile dysfunction. It seems that God is just laughing at me just like the builles did when I was a […]
Average Person
Depression.
Just the word alone make the average person want to look the other way.
But with so many people experiencing depression or a other mental illness. The issue is all around us. So why are mental health issues still a taboo..?
Perhaps the most scary thing about a mental health problem is the fact that it is not external. There is no rash, cough or cold to indicate illness. Just a quiet hijacking of the mind.
As you know I have a very rich grandmother who is quite snobby and verbally abused me when i was a child. Last week I was talking to her on the phone and my plan had slipped out and i told her by mistake.. She tried long and far to stop me but i said no to everything… For some fucking stupid reason she decided to give me a mil to enjoy before I pass away…I now this would sound really fake to the average person but i don’t care if you believe me or not. All that matters is what should i do with […]
To whomever reads this
I see a therapist to deal with my anxiety disorder that is heavily plagued with panic attacks and I am often ‘scared’ into a state of immobility where I cannot think move or breathe for short periods of time.
Anyway, we were discussing characteristics of what a person with anxiety exhibits and whether there are any common links. He had studied all his patients (and aside from other details he wasn’t able to release under confidentiality laws) he was able to tell me 64% of his patients were aquarius.
It is funny that this statistic exists. A profiling overview of an aquarius person states […]
I’m starting to gain weight! I know that so many females (and some males) would dread this, but I can’t tell you how happy it makes me!
Before my life took a turn for the worse, I use to eat like a pig. I’d have up to 5th servings for everything and just seem to not stop eating. I’d exercise most of it off, but I was still large for my age. During the time when my depression was at it’s highest, I basically stopped eating and started trying to exercise a lot. As a result, I lost nearly half my body weight. Even as I started getting […]
ME.
underneath im: stupid, a loser, a loner, a cutter, unusual, different, shunned, hated, betrayed, embarrased, failure, sad, unloved, defeated, lonely, DEPRESSED. so strange i can make this seem untrue. i fake my way through life- “fake it til u make it” would that make me a liar? an attention seeker? i dont think so but i dont care what i think.. ha i dont even know who i am cuz i care what u think, i change all the time. just to make you happy. but that will neva happen cuz u will never be ok with me. dont feel bad its not just […]
I can’t remember the last time I was truly happy.
I have no real friends that I can talk to anymore and I have no idea what I truly want to do or where my life is going. I went to college and I have a stable job. But I didn’t make it in life. I am an average person; I am a loser. I wake up, go to work, eat, shower, watch TV, eat, read a book, sleep—repeat. That’s it. Nothing spectacular but nothing that miserable.
I am afraid this is my life. This is it. There is nothing more.
I no longer have any real desire. […]
i follow every single rule in place for me, why can i get out of the fucking system? then you get these lucky bitches who get off and they are in no shape or place to be and they go and do drugs or illigal shit,while im working my ass off, i want to run far away,but the only people that would even look for me is the cops,im 21 years old,i feel like a slave, slaves had to fight for there freedom to and thats exactly what im doing,i want so much in life that the average person that walksd past me gets, that […]
Here we go. Just tossing this essay of self-hate out there, so some sicko can read it and get their jollies off from my misery. Well, either that, or well-meaning people will drop some meaningless words of encouragement, sympathy, or advice.
Where should I start? I’m 26. I think about killing myself nearly every day. Things that I once found fun, I simply do to waste time. I no longer get any enjoyment from them. I’m in college, studying chemistry, but I really don’t see the point, and I don’t even know if I’m working toward a realistic goal. I work part time at a […]
If I had a gun right now, I wouldnt be typing this.. i would be dead. Unluckily for me, I live in Ireland.
There is nothing wrong with my life and nothing that I cant change.I just lack the motivation to do whats best for myself and use my talents. I know where im going wrong but I choose to do nothing. Im the only one at fault, I dont blame the world for my own lack of effort. The truth is that life just bores me… learn to drive, get a job, buy a house, get married, have kids and die. That pretty much […]