please, anyone here that is even suicidal or slightly suicidal, or even not, or just needing someone to talk to, please send me an email. I want to be a friend to you and to try to offer you advice for a blessed life. I am not so old or wise, just 22, but I am pained at reading so many of these posts and I have it in me to be encouraging. I am not acting like I am some kind of suicide hotline but I know those hotlines cannot help to fill the void. please give me an opportunity to encourage you and be […]
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I’m running away from people again.
First time I didn’t have any friends. So it was ok if they didn’t talk to me since I didn’t talk to them.
This time I’ve met so many nice people, but I even catch myself saying  ‘I’m late, we’ll catch up later, right?’ and almost literally running.
I’m out of facebooks and whatsapp groups. I wait some hours or days to text someone back.
Inside, there is that famous phrase ‘help me!’ screaming in repeat. They even know I’m not fine and they want to talk, to make me feel better. So why do I run when I have […]
please, anyone here that is even suicidal or slightly suicidal, or even not, or just needing someone to talk to, please send me an email. I want to be a friend to you and to try to offer you advice for a blessed life. I am not so old or wise, just 22, but I am pained at reading so many of these posts and I have it in me to be encouraging. I am not acting like I am some kind of suicide hotline but I know those hotlines cannot help to fill the void. please give me an opportunity to encourage you and be […]
I’m just tired.
I’m just sad.
I’m just angry.
Today at school, some Christian told me i wasn’t going to heaven. Just because i don’t believe in Jesus. I do believe in God, though. But she doesn’t seem to understand that. Then after that, a friend of mine told me she had gone to the guidance office with one of my other friends. Extremely concerned on what happened, i asked why. They told me, it was for me. Some “preps” were talking about me behind my back, during gym today. They were saying that me and my girlfriend weren’t really in love, that we were […]
I know that my life has become pure suffering, all my dreams, all my fears, all the passion and all the devotion are now smashed into shards.However, I started to remember everything with joy and nostalgia … my memories are coming back in flashes : the way I used to sit and stare at a tree; the taste of my favourite ice cream; how funny it was to play with my friends in my childhood…
I’ve lived for so long.17 years.It’s curious to think that there are people who want to live for 100 years, and I’m unhappy enough with 17.It was a life.I’ve […]
I’ve been depressed on and off for about four years. I was in love with a good guy friend of mine. He moved away for a year and began dating his childhood best friend. About a year later I met a guy I liked. He was smart and funny in a dorky way. Things got complicated and it didn’t work out. This is when I first began to experience my depression. I listened to music most of the time, slept long hours, and neglected my homework and chores. I became a recluse. For months I was in a haze, but one day I snapped out […]
Me and my boyfriend *gasp* i know, i know why is this little ***** complaining about how life hates her, when she has a boyfriend that loves her?
1. I Feel numb, but he gives me some feeling back
2. He makes me smile and laugh, but I’m still not happy
3. He holds me when I’m crying, but I’m always crying
but the sad truth is my internet friends is that I don’t love him; I don’t even know if i like him. I mean he is the nicest guy you could meet, and he’s handsome, but I don’t know how I feel […]
Ignore me like disease
A ghost you choose not to see
Pretend I’m not there because
Shortly I won’t be
Maybe you thought I was stronger
That I could live through it
That the lies you spoke no longer linger
And instead I found peace
But you’re wrong, dead wrong
I’m just better at hiding it
The pain you put me through
Gave me much needed guidance
Trust no one
Believe in nothing
And the day will soon come
Where you feel nothing
No pain, no hurt, no sorrow
Maybe emptiness is a better way of living
Keep my heart beating is all you asked […]
well, this sucks. I can’t go to anyone. And I’ve been clean for so many months now and I really don’t want to go back. Someone saw me writing on here and I don’t know. Just don’t feel safe again. I feel like I’m gonna do something to myself if I’m ever alone
There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.
It’s Friday
Her alarm goes off at 6:00am…she hits the snooze button. “I do not want to get up today.” She pulls the cover over her face and falls back asleep until 7:00am.
She finally gets the energy to get up out of bed and drags herself into the shower, and begins to get ready for school. As she’s getting ready she occasionally looks out the window – the fog is rolling in and its windy. She sighs deeply inside…”I don’t want to go to school today”. Putting on her make up, she gives up halfway and gets dressed. With the little energy she has, she throws her […]
Okay… abyssal. My atomic cry. You, reader; unknown other champion of the “Present.” Your saber of light will ingnite, or let me die. Whoever you may be, in the land of Gotham City. Light to the light, reaching to the outers limit. Dr. Faith.
by Bisban
written by Bisban
No more herb, and forever.
No more green ignition. Will the Joker have the last laugh.
I, versus Lobo’s chain and Deathstroke’s Claymore.
Back to the place where “simple,” beaten to a bloody death.
Attempting words, into the lost façade. Fade. No echo.
The cry of the millennium.
In arms chain, and iron mask. A bodied spirit.
The Lucifer. Crucified upside-down.
The Bringer Of Light. The hidden suffer. The secret truth.
A sad child of Satan world. This is the voice of the “New Age,” dying.
The preach, sabotaged.
My humble children. Our mothers of life.
Change, why does it not. Grace is dead.
The truth, […]
I can’t hold the things I feel inside any longer I ditched school so Ican be alone so no one can bother me but it just caused more trouble.. I feel like a burden to my sisters to my brothers to my parents I can’t stay happy Cus when I am the thoughts jut flow back in those negative dark thoughts ..
the other night I was crying
and thinking about dying
I grabbed my knife and felt the familiar sting from my addiction to cutting.
i laid back and I felt dizzy. probably from the blood I lost.
looked down at my arms and legs and wondered who could love a girl like me.
then my beautiful little cat snuggled up against my cut up arm gently. put her paw against them and laid there until I stopped crying. like she knew what was going on. like she knew I needed any kind of comfort in that moment.
maybe if my cat can still love me there’s hope for people to.
Home for a 3-day weekend. Last time it was a week and I was left entertaining and flirting with the concept of death. Anything, really, to keep from having to take part in the shameful charade any longer. You come home. We sit in front of the TV, we ignore and tune each other out as we stare listlessly at the screen for hours on end.
Is that all that life has become for you? Don’t you want to talk about anything of substance, anything at all? Why can’t you just be civil for once? Why is every word out of your mouth an insult, a […]
I’m alone. and maybe it’s better this way. I told the guy I’ve been in love with for almost a year now. to leave me alone. I’ve isolated myself from my family. I can’t even find the strength to get up and go to school for the last two days. I don’t want to go back on anti depressants. but I don’t know how to be okay right now. a part of me feels like it’s missing. I said things I didn’t mean but I know they were better to say then try make people understand the truth.
i still don’t want to live. i still […]
There was a suicide blog named wantdeath.blogspot.com
Is anyone aware of that website? it had a shoutbox! That was the website that saved my life! and many others around the world who are suicidal and want a way out! I had actually made friends there :(( and now the website is gone  :'( I wish it comes back again
I think I’ll try to give this life one more year…..I’ll be 60 next year on March 26th……that is, if God doesn’t take me on his own before then…………you see…..since Mom died about this time last year, I have no one who loves me and cares for me in the selfless way a mother or partner can…..and there is no one who wants or needs that from me. The lonely, solitary life that was chosen for me by illness is simply not any way for a “senior” citizen to live……I’m in that high risk category, by gender and age, for suicide. I cared for Mom as companion and helper/care giver […]
I think I have what I call fat girl syndrome. I used to weigh in at 260lbs almost all my teenage life. I was well liked and respected because I was so big (not to mention small town life) it never bothered me to be fat. One day when I was 19 I decided i’d give the skinnier life a try… I quit eating, (which I found myself falling asleep behind the wheel) so I ate more. I walked, didn’t eat past 5pm (keep in mind I lived at home and was not pressured to get a job.) In one years time I lost over […]
But it sucks seeing my ex bf marrying some girl he managed to replace me with so quickly. I mean come on dude you’re 19 and you’re ready to spend the rest of your life with her? It makes me lol and want to cry at the same time.
I doubt any man is gonna want a woman with scars all over her body though =.=
Any of you feel the same way? I want someone in my life to help me along my goal to getting my survivor’s mentality back.
But I now also have a problem with the whole love life thing because of […]