Tag:

burning

Free Hat

by LifeafterDeath 5/13/2014

written by LifeafterDeath

Drinking an crying drinking and crying. filling up the empty bottle with tears so i can just pour it all over my psychiatrists nice rug tomorrow and say “Thats how i feel” but he wouldn’t get it.

You know the worst and maybe greatest feeling i’ve discovered in this amazing life, is the feeling you get when you realise you gotta take control of your own death. That strong burning sensation you get on the wrist’s that trickling blood feeling behind the eyes, so much passion and euphoria. which sadly is designed to be short lived, for reasons we all know.

Sorry I’m in a mood. 70% […]

5/13/2014 2 comments

more pathetic blathering

by kristink 5/8/2014

written by kristink

i feel a crying jag coming on for no particular reason. just really sad today. i am pretty sure i took my meds this morning though my memory sucks when i am in this state. i wonder what it would be like to not take meds. just be me au naturale. i suppose i would just fall further into the abyss. though at this time i question whether there is much more to fall into.Â my suicidal thoughts are all encompassing. i see my death in everyday things. falling down the stairs, crossing the street, cutting up vegetables, burning myself on the stove. when i […]

5/8/2014 0 comment

Ghastly

by khajiit 5/5/2014

written by khajiit

I want to embed myself under the furled layers of your essence, tuck myself beside the pulsating beat of your vulnerability. I want to drink you in, sip your secrets like shots of soul-warming alcohol. Intoxicate me with your purity, render me unconscious with your superiority and smother me with your suffocating beauty. Tease me with the palpable touch of your absence and speak to me in words so powerful their meaning can’t be truly fathomed. I miss the quintessence of your endless nihility.
Like a beautiful, burning inferno I want you to burst into vibrancy, your hot, explosive atmosphere lighting up the room in […]

5/5/2014 4 comments

countdown to april 30

by candyapple 4/25/2014

written by candyapple

i’ve finally decided to do it. the date will be april 30, after watching the new spiderman 🙂 it’s been a great 25 years of life, but the past two years have just been too much to deal with anymore. somebody told me to love myself, and in this sense, i feel like i am. at least i wont feel anymore pain, right?

i’ve decided to use the hibachi method, hopefully, i can find burning coals along the way.

hey, whoever you are, thanks for reading this. i’ve lost people to talk to. i didn’t want to bother my friends anymore, and my family will just label […]

4/25/2014 15 comments

Better?

by abigail 4/24/2014

written by abigail

I start to see a new way, everything seems okay now, but right when things seem fine….my world comes crashing down around me and i cant stand the weight of everything thats happening , i just want things to be better and be able to be happy on my own is that to much to ask? like for real…. i hate depression with a burning passion i want to kill it. make it go away please …………….

4/24/2014 3 comments

18 August 1987

by Nusu Nusu 4/16/2014

written by Nusu Nusu

And

The leaden

Stone seared

A passage to the light

So that the darkness might escape

So that the spell might for once break

It sped through the darkness

And it caused no trail of fire

Nor yet feelings coldness freezing

There were no sounds trumpets calling

There were no voices high pitched screaming

No fires brightly burning

There was only darkness waiting

Her arms outstretched

Receiving.

4/16/2014 0 comment

by thingschange 4/11/2014

written by thingschange

That moment.

That feeling.

That place.

You can feel yourselfâ€¦

Alone.

Hot water

Running down your

Face.

Washing away the pain

The hurt

The filth.

The water pressure

Against your back

The feeling of both

Relief and loneliness

Every memory from that day

Running through your mind

Greif in your body

Depressed

The water burning the cuts

That is fresh

Overwhelmed in the moment

A place to be alone.

4/11/2014 0 comment

by winterrain98 4/9/2014

written by winterrain98

Sorting out my thoughts I guess, really hard to knowÂ what is what Â anymore,Â am I just thinking this way cuz im angry or depressed or Â is this what I really think.Â I question every thoughtÂ i have anymore, I don’t trust myselfÂ to make many decisions anymore.Â Insomnia is kickingÂ my ass .Â 2-3 hours sleep a day is really getting to me.Â Soon i will crash an sleep hours an hours.Â Obessessive thoughts and tourrettes syndrome is starting to get really bad to.

I have nightmares about my boyfriend , in them im trying to escape and hide from him.Â .. Guess cuz of all the […]

4/9/2014 0 comment

This Martian Land

by khajiit 4/8/2014

written by khajiit

In this Martian, barren land
Upon a rustic hill I stand
on this ground no being breathes
to allow for ghastly, ghoulish deeds.

Phantoms reek of mystic smells,
And devils ring their wailing bells
Whose voices warn of blasphemy
And sing of brewing agony.

No protest comes from those deceased,
Their bodies slain with frightful ease.
A sickle formed of lust and greed
Carried out this gruesome deed.

Gods bear witness to my crime
Condemning this sold life of mine.
The children vanish in the sand
and out protrudes their withered hands

I feel my burning blood on fire
As I amass this desert […]

4/8/2014 2 comments

“Music is not music anymore, it’s a fucking plastic fashion show”

by Wednesday 4/3/2014

written by Wednesday

I am most sure that today in the music scene talent and practice will get you nowhere, nor will it get you noticed by record labels or the fans the labels control.
Music has turned into a fashion show that has nothing to do with music.

I have come to the conclusion that my 16 years of classical training and practicing many different instruments has all been for nothing since I refuse to cover my body in tattoos, play hot topic dress up and crop my hair off at a weird angle. I am most sure if I did those three […]

4/3/2014 5 comments

Follow Your Dreams or Follow Your Heart?

by shatteredhopes 3/31/2014

written by shatteredhopes

In this situation in particular,
do I choose to follow my dreams or to follow my heart?
How do I know which will work out?

Do I follow my dreams and risk it all?
Or, do I follow my heart and end it all?

They both may seem so simplistic, of that I’m sure,
but they are burning me to the core.
Why must my endeavors of thisÂ be so intricate,
when there are no plans and no times set?

My dreams are supposed to balance my internal torment,
but my choices cause nothing but my mere discontent.

All the things I once cared about are now obsolete,
and though […]

3/31/2014 1 comment

I had a dream

by nozmoking 3/4/2014

written by nozmoking

Throughout my life I’ve been rather fearless but there are a couple of things that always scared me – death by suffocation or drowning and being burned to death. Maybe it’s the fact of having no control in the moment. Like being trapped in a burning car or having something heavy fall and being pinned to the ground, unable to breath or fight in any way.

But last night I had a dream. In this dream there were no circumstances or long, drawn out situations. Just the perception of burning; burning away all my useless flesh and taking my physical pain and disabilities away with it. […]

3/4/2014 17 comments

A dammed river

by lostchild445 2/26/2014

written by lostchild445

Pen to paper, ink on the page
Unable to let flow the words I made
A block, a wall, something in the way makes it feel like these words are fake. My heart, my soul, my self I used to pour in the paper
The lines, the truth printed out in front of their maker, never forced never coerced out of his mind but now those same words I’ve written a thousand times seem hard to find.
Have I drank the well dry? Is it because I’ve gotten too happy to cry or feel empty inside? Is that where my inspiration was derived? Where my […]

2/26/2014 0 comment

Self Doubt/Really struggling…

by bugman 2/4/2014

written by bugman

So much self doubt that I will survive these suicidal urges. Even my therapist is really worried about me. I can’t get suicide off my mind. Lately some issues have resurfaced that have caused me to start burning again and have me thinking of suicide almost constantly. These issues include relationships(romantic),fear of abandonment/rejection,boundaries,self hatred,etc…I keep having dreams/nightmares about suicide and think about suicide all day long. I watch videos on how to do it,videos about people who have committed suicide,videos about people who have survived suicide attempts and listen to songs about suicide. Several times lately I have had the knife to my wrist ready […]

2/4/2014 0 comment

An open message to God

by nozmoking 2/3/2014

written by nozmoking

I thought I once knew who or what you are. I am not stupid; I can see the wondrous universe and all of its beautiful order and structure and I know this did not happen by chance. But all I know of you now is the pain you think I and others need. I awaken every day with my addictions to something better and my burning desire to leave my broken body and relieve the searing burn of my broken spirit. I am through begging a higher power for delivery. I am done feeling the compulsion to dig an artery out of one of my […]

2/3/2014 14 comments

More than one cause…

by PhantomShadow 1/26/2014

written by PhantomShadow

The deep and uncontrollable need for that pure dark silence…Â The blissfull absence of all senses…Â I want it, but I know I am not allowed…

On a good day, the suicidal thoughts used to roam my mind on and off through out the day.Â At night, while in bed, no matter what I did, my mind would wander to the topic.Â The medication has helped…a lot, but now, with the weather being so unpredictable with rain coming and going and the humidity, my body is contributing to the reasons “why not” and is pushing past the barrier so carefully constructed by the various pills I […]

1/26/2014 0 comment

I can’t help but cry….

by whyme336 1/24/2014

written by whyme336

I cry not because I’m sad but because I’ve built up so many emotions I don’t know what else to do. But crying leads to cutting, cutting leads to burning, burning leads to bruising, bruising leads to suicidal thoughts, suicidal thoughts leads to suicide plans, suicide plans leads to suicide letters, suicide letters leads to suicide, suicide leads to others crying…

1/24/2014 2 comments

Burning Out

by __D__ 1/24/2014

written by __D__

Forgive me, for I have sinned..

I have committed acts of lust

I have committed acts of hatred

I have committed acts of theft

I have committed acts of homosexuality

I have committed acts of pride

I have committed acts of greed

I have committed acts of gluttony

I have committed acts of lying

I have committed acts of being agnostic

I have committed acts of feeling suicidal

And here I stand on two feet

Waiting to be struck down

To burn, to live an eternity in Hell

I may be a sinner, but won’t my good deeds in this mortal life do anything for me in the afterlife?

Will I stand at the gates of Heaven, and fall into […]

1/24/2014 2 comments

I miss feeling alive

by Naldoron 10/22/2013

written by Naldoron

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SHqo2FDJSU0I feel like nothing is going anywhere… nothing is getting any better. A year ago I moved to my father’s to finally get away from my mother, sister, and my mother’s boyfriend, because they were pushing me to the edge. They’ve always been “there” for me, at things like competitions for band, and driving me to school events… but that is pretty much where it ends.
My mother loves me, and I hate seeing her upset, but when my sister is around, there is always a pointless fight started by her, and I get to the point of just wanting to jump off the […]

10/22/2013 1 comment

Wow..

by rawrimaturtle.. 11/23/2012

written by rawrimaturtle..

i told my parents about how i have a girlfriend now… big mistake.,. did not accept it at all.. so what if i like girls and guys?

ugh… worst night ever. and to add to it. my girlfriend dumped me.. so i told my parents for nothing… i tell my friends and theyre all like “you should of waited a month before telling your parents” and im like, wow! cant you just be here for me instead of telling me the things i should of done differently…

i wanted to start being close to my parents.. so i was gunna try.. well im done trying.. my mom […]

11/23/2012 0 comment

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